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miss_natalie · Apr 25, 2010, 06:03 AM

Hi everyone, thank you for your help. I am having relationship problems, and am not sure as to whether I am being unfair... my boyfriend and I have been together now for 8 years, I am 26 and he is 25. He has a demanding job and is very career orientated, but lately all he does it work and has no interest in me at all, even sex. He works a 10 hour day, works every weekend, and even works on public holidays. He doesn't want to touch me or have sex, and is not affectionate at all. The sad thing is, all I seem to be concerned about is the lack of affection. I feel selfish and superficial but the lack of physical contact is making me depressed. I flirt with everyone I meet, and I crave attention now. I have tried talking to him about this, but he just says that I am not being supportive and he is tired, but this has been going on for a year now... please help, should I leave?

sphx26 · Apr 25, 2010, 07:02 AM

It is not over until you both give up. "Variety is the spice of life",I'm not saying that you both should get your own variety in other people.lol... but try to do something that is not so "routine". Try something new together, go on vacation or something. As long as it is a new activity that you both love, then that ought to bring some excitement back into your relationship, ei? Good luck, and I hope everything will turn out fine.

sully123 · Apr 25, 2010, 09:24 AM

I think you are answering your own question. It's time to move on. That's a poor excuse because he works 10 hour days and isn't affectionate at all to you. Those are just excuses. He isn't willing to change, he is being selfish and thinking of himself. He isn't going to put an effort into the relationship, he tells you he is tired. Sorry, but I don't buy that. It's time for you to find someone who can give you what you want. Don't waste anymore time on someone who doesn't care less about the relationship. You deserve better!

Devorameira · Apr 25, 2010, 12:54 PM

Everyone gets tired, but unless he's sick, there's no excuse for him not showing some signs of affection.

We all go through short periods where we aren't as loving, but a year is way too long.

Since you've tried talking to him about your needs and he appears to have no interest in meeting your needs, I think maybe it's time to move on.

talaniman · Apr 25, 2010, 01:01 PM

He may be busy at work, and seem to have little time for you, but the key thing is WHAT you do with your time.

If your approach to not having your man give you enough attention is to seek it else where then you better break it off and leave him alone.

I think a much better course of action is using your free time in a positive way for yourself, that you enjoy, and not lead you to shame and guilt.

I think that's the choice you make and if its another person you want, then tell the one your with to take a hike.

Do it the right way.