[Mountainlion79]

I was broken up with through a text message after my ex-girlfriend returned from a 5 day business conference.

She is scheduled for surgery to remove cysts and her right ovary(possibly) She learned of this right before her trip.

I made the mistake of assuming she was already back when I sent her a rude message.

"Jeez, it's nice to know that I'm the last person to know you're back"

She told me she could not take the stress of the upcoming surgery and worrying about me thinking the worst case scenario.


I could not get her on the phone. I have sent two messages and a friend request on FB, thereby breaking NC. Happened last night.

15.5 month relationship... I will answer any question to help you help me.

Thank you...

[I wish]

Sounds like she's going a really big rough patch.

I suggest that you put your relationship in the backseat and check your ego at the door. This isn't only about you. It's about her too. This is the time to be as supportive as possible, as a friend or whatever.

If she wants you there, then be there for her. If she wants space, then leave her alone. Respect her wishes. Don't force her to do something that she's not comfortable with.

Once she's recovered, then you can talk about your relationship with her again.

[friend4u178]

Like Iwish said above , time to give her some space to sort her stuff out , she will respect you so much more if you leave her be and do as she asks.

If you start trying to contact her or bombarding her with emails , texts etc. it'll just push her away further.

[Mountainlion79]

You guy's are the absolute best. I just got an email from her that she is giving ME space in order to sort myself out and forgive myself for my past that is affecting us now.

I can only assume it is a good thing and she offered to give me updates on her surgery(I accepted) and I made no mention of our relationship. I just said that thank you for giving me the space and I will do this for me and to not lose her or my family.

Is it safe to say that going the route I feel in my heart and suggested here and by my mom (God Bless her) that space in this situation is good?

Again, thank you so very much for the responses and I will update as it goes along.

[I wish]

You should definitely spend this time to make yourself a better person. Work on yourself. Once you're more comfortable and confident about yourself, you will be a better person for her to come back to.

[Mountainlion79]

I wish, Thank you and Godbless. I won''t fail and I will report back :)


I will also look around the forums to help guide me to inner peace.

[talaniman]

You have to give your partner space to deal with their issues. You can't expect them to deal with yours, when they have their own.

[Mountainlion79]

You have to give your partner space to deal with their issues. You can't expect them to deal with yours, when they have their own.

:) I thank her for giving it to me and will extend the same to her. I do not initiate any contact unless contacted. Even though I have a great lead on a job tomorrow, I will only mention it if she asks.

In the meantime, I am dealing with my issues and confronting my past demons.

"To live with ghosts, requires solitude"


I don't want to suffer in self pity anymore.