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    Roxie10's Avatar
    Roxie10 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Apr 19, 2010, 01:18 PM
    Father has not went to court for visitation do I have to let him see son before he go
    Un married father wants visitation right with out court order I was wondering if I had to give it to him. We've been to court for child support but nothing else.
    cdad's Avatar
    cdad Posts: 12,700, Reputation: 1438
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    #2

    Apr 19, 2010, 03:02 PM

    Lets put it this way. Do you really want to walk into a court room and have to explain why your witholding the child from the other parent? That could get you in serious trouble.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #3

    Apr 19, 2010, 08:05 PM

    If there is no court order, no you don't have to. BUT as noted, if he does go back to court and shows you refused him to see the child, he is more likely to win more visits at that time since you will appear to be the bad guy
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #4

    Apr 20, 2010, 08:42 AM

    I'm going to disagree (somewhat) with my colleagues - a lot of MY decision would depend on how much I trust the father, how prepared he is to care for the child, why didn't he apply for formal visitation at the time of the hearing for support - ?

    If there is a CHANCE that the child will not be brought back to you in accordance with any agreement you have with the father OR you don't think the child will be safe I would NOT let the father take the child.

    I personally would be very hesitant to allow one on one visitation without clear, concise direction from the Court.
    this8384's Avatar
    this8384 Posts: 4,564, Reputation: 485
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    #5

    Apr 20, 2010, 11:03 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by JudyKayTee View Post
    I'm going to disagree (somewhat) with my colleagues - a lot of MY decision would depend on how much I trust the father, how prepared he is to care for the child, why didn't he apply for formal visitation at the time of the hearing for support - ?

    If there is a CHANCE that the child will not be brought back to you in accordance with any agreement you have with the father OR you don't think the child will be safe I would NOT let the father take the child.

    I personally would be very hesitant to allow one on one visitation without clear, concise direction from the Court.
    I half agree with you and the other half agrees with califdad and FrChuck. She didn't state that she didn't trust him, just that she didn't want the child to see him. The simple statement "i was wondering if i have to give it to him" makes me think it's not a trust issue, but rather a personal one.
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #6

    Apr 20, 2010, 01:07 PM

    One way or the other OP has to be clear with her own thinking - of course, we're all "guessing."

    If it is a personal issue (she is just angry with him), then, of course, she should allow him to see the child. If there is a margin of suspicion - absolutely not.
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
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    #7

    Apr 20, 2010, 03:48 PM

    There is one piece of info here that you left out. WHY don't you want to let him see his child? You had a relationship with this man, intimate enough to have sex with him.

    Basically I agree with everyone here. If you don't have a good reason to withhold the child from him then it will look bad when you go to court. On the other hand if you do have fears for your child, that comes first, but you better be able to prove that your fears are real.
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