[tomjj]

I was dating a great girl for the last year. The last month she indicated she wanted to e singe - not because we ever fought or had dysfunction. It was her need to get a career and also have no accountability - since she was married for 5 years and had a couple of children, she wanted to clear her head of her ex and sort out a life plan.

We separated, and it was tough but I said OK. I did not however talk to her since, because that helps me clear my head. She would like to have that not be my way... But accepted it.

Now, 3 weeks later she emails me asking to represent my work (I have a media product). She offered to work with me to bring new business to my business. She has her own job/money, so it's not economic desperation. It is rather a collaboration she thinks could be successful.

Is she angling to stay in touch to keep me on hold?
Or is this just friends?
Any other questions I can answer that would help?

Thanks.

[Larken85]

I don't think I can really answer that. All I can say is let whatever happens happen and be patient. If she comes back to you, then she does. She may just want to be friends.

Personally anyway I look at it I would still want some connection to her. Of course we preach no contact rules here to heal but I don't see this as a horrible break up.

[amicon]

Would you be able to keep it stricktly business?

What are your other options regarding your product?

Personally,I wouldn't get involved in any business projects with an ex.

[Devorameira]

I don’t know what’s she’s thinking. It’s possible that she wants to hang on to you as a friend or may want to have you as a back-up in case she doesn’t find someone else.

I’m sure you don’t want to be her back-up buddy. If you can't be first in her life, you surely don't want to be second.

I wouldn’t want to remain as friends with her either. Being friends with her would be like putting on a mask and pretending to be someone you're not. The entire situation would be nothing but fake smiles, small talk, jealousy, and pretend happiness every time she accomplishes something without you in her life.

Imagine her telling you (her “friend”) that she's met a great new guy and she starts dating again. Can you handle being the buddy who gets the late night phone calls or who offers the shoulder she leans on when things go wrong in her new relationships?

I wouldn't get involved in any venture with her.

[talaniman]

If you can't handle a business relationship without seeing romance, and fantasy, don't do it!!

You will be sorry if you do!

[Ash123]

I think what you are asking is she sending you a vibe of second thoughts that would validate you? She may be:
- keeping you close as a back-up
- or to have the benefits of friendship
- and assuage her guilt. It's a hat trick!

She obviously likes you and has no fear of you, if that helps. Women's time horizon, unless they want babies can be longer than a man's. A year is not much to a woman if she thinks she can control the situation. Don't let her. It will be healthier for you - and speed up the truth if she does have an angle... They say that being cool after a break up makes a woman shake her head in wonder... Well, if she wants to represent you, she better get in line :-)

[amicon]

A woman's time zone?
Sorry I don't agree with that statement.

We are all individuals, and act and react differently in the situations we find ourselves in.

[Ash123]

Agreed.

Patience is sometimes required in life regardless of gender.
(this may not be one of those times though. Sounds unsure :-)

[vanheart]

Don't work with her, ever.

Screw that.

[teshbm]

Keep off en start a new life...