[TQuinn1080]

My daughter is now 9 1/2 years old, her biological father has not had any contact with her in almost 2 years. She wants nothing to do with him and refers to him by his name, refuses to call him dad.

When my daughter was an infant, I went to court with her father re: child support. At the time, his family and himself were very active parts of her life so I got suckered into a shared parenting order. Since Sommer, my daughter, was less than a year old, that has all changed. I used to take her to his mother's house (he lived there and currently still does) all the time trying to "make" him be a part of her life. When Sommer was 4, his sister verbally attacked Sommer and threatened physical harm to her. I got her out of there immediately and to this day his sister still is never around her. This sister was also living there with her toddler daughter. Children services came in and removed the child giving her to her father d/t the disgusting condition of the house and to this day no children are permitted to be there.

Sommer has had no contact with anyone on his side of the family in almost 2 years. The only person Sommer ever even mentions is her father's mom who calls maybe once a year when she wants something from me. She is also homebound d/t health conditions, so even if she wanted to see Sommer, I legally can not take her to that house. The last couple of times she did see her father, she wanted nothing to do with him and asked me if we could leave.

I have filed the paper work several times over the last year and a half trying to get back into court for child support at least, but I never hear back from anyone. I would much prefer if Sommer's father would just give up his rights all together and I honestly think he would instead of paying the support. My fiancé who we have been with for almost 6 years is Sommer's daddy. He supports her in every way and wants to adopt her once we can get married. Is there anything I can do now to get her "father" out of the picture legally until we do get married? Can my fiancé adopt her before that? I really just don't know what to do and I'm so afraid that someone from her father's side of the family will do something crazy if they hear of me trying to do anything like this. One of his sister's got mad at me one time and tried to take Sommer from my fiance's mom at a carnival several years ago. None of them are mentally compatent to have my child ever with out me there. Help? :(

[Fr_Chuck]

1. he can not just "give up his rights" unless you have a new partner willing to adopt.

2. if there is no child support order in place, he does not owe any support.

3. you can not require him to visit.

I don't know why you legally can't take her to that one home ?

Your first move is to change custody, not support, and then add support

[stinawords]

Okay first off many states require a year of marriage before an adoption can take place. Second, your first move is to get into court to have the custody order changed then deal with the suppor issue. Have you asked if he will be willing to allow the adoption once all the other criteria is met?