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    sue cin's Avatar
    sue cin Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
    		  
    #1

    Dec 13, 2006, 06:49 PM
    Betrayed
    I was betrayed by a boyfriend of 4 years and it has been 1 1/2 years and I still haven't got over it he just left me one day for another women and I am having a hard time getting over the pain I would really appreciate some help:

    Mad:
    valinors_sorrow's Avatar
    valinors_sorrow Posts: 2,927, Reputation: 653
    I regard all beings mostly by their consciousness and little else
    		  
    #2

    Dec 13, 2006, 06:59 PM
    Betrayal is a different kind of hurt. It damages deeply and worse it causes us to lose our sense of knowing what is what. First there is the loss of your relationship but its compounded by the terrible way he ended it. It takes a great amount of grief work to restore our sense of proportion to things. My guess, based on what little you posted, is you have somehow dug yourself a little foxhole somewhere in the grief journey process and you have holed up in it. Hard to say more than that without more information... such as:

    Is it any better today than when it first happened and if so, how?
    What is the predominent feeling involved now-- fear, sorrow, anger?
    What was the predominant feeling in the beginning?
    What if any conclusions have you drawn from this experience?
    And finally, how good at looking at yourself objectively do you think you are?

    Share this if you like. I don't mean to be nosey but what you posted is not a lot to go on.
    teemar's Avatar
    teemar Posts: 6, Reputation: 3
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    #3

    Dec 13, 2006, 07:30 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by sue cin
    i was betrayed by a boyfriend of 4 years and it has been 1 1/2 years and i still havent got over it he just left me one day for another women and i am having a hard time getting over the pain i would really appreciate some help:

    mad:
    My mother and step-father were married for 13 yrs. and one day he told her he found someone else, it took her three agonizing yrs to let him go! I watched her everyday, its hard. One thing that I can suggest is to think of how bad he hurt you everyday, get mad at him. Learn not to love him, love doesn't hurt.
    Bluerose's Avatar
    Bluerose Posts: 1,521, Reputation: 310
    Ultra Member
    		  
    #4

    Dec 14, 2006, 05:33 AM
    sue cin,

    I'm sorry you are hurting so much. I have the urge to post this song for you. I don't know why but I hope it helps. Sometimes we just want to kick some but. And if it stops us from hurting so much, so be it. He betrayed you, he doesn't deserve the energy you are spending on him right now.

    Time to move on, sweetie. Play this loud.

    Aaron Tippin - Kiss This.mp3
    http://www.filelodge.com/files/room1...iss%20This.mp3


    PS. I hope the link works.
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