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Junior Member
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Mar 3, 2010, 07:00 PM
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I feel for you, I really do. I went through a bad breakup last year. He was my first as well. I had troubles eating and sleeping. I too felt like I could never trust again, but at the same time I felt like I would never love someone as much as I loved my ex.
Then I realized something. Life isn't going to wait for me to get over this. My friends are going to continue living, life is going to continue and I needed to decide whether I was going to sit there and pity myself or get act together. Everyone needs to take time to heal but breaking up isn't the end of your book, it's the end of a chapter.
What you're feeling is completely normal. I am now with someone new... and to think last year I was sure I was never going to love again. But I took what I learnt from the last relationship, and because of that I am a better person. You will through this, and I have no doubt in my mind that you will love again.
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Junior Member
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Mar 3, 2010, 07:53 PM
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Wow... your message has brought me to tears. I am so happy from your words. It feels like you have opened up my eyes...
 Originally Posted by AmericanGirl01
Then I realized something. Life isn't going to wait for me to get over this. My friends are going to continue living, life is going to continue and I needed to decide whether or not I was going to sit there and pity myself or get act together. Everyone needs to take time to heal but breaking up isn't the end of your book, its the end of a chapter.
SO TRUE!! OMG!! Yes...
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Uber Member
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Mar 3, 2010, 10:23 PM
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And now its time to start writing a new chapter!
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Junior Member
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Mar 8, 2010, 03:24 PM
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Was doing good... But today was especially hard on me. I am starting to cry again about it all. Is it normal to go from strong to weak to rock bottom? I feel like since it has been 2 months I should not be this upset anymore. It hurts so bad to know that she has not tried to come back to me or at least talk to me. The pain is so real... I don't know what to-do in life anymore. HELP!
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Expert
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Mar 8, 2010, 05:39 PM
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You just let it pass like any other storm that sweeps through your life. Like any other bad day at work. Why? Because bad as it is at the moment, it will pass and get better. Hold on to that thought.
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Junior Member
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Mar 9, 2010, 01:09 PM
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I hope you are right. Gah it hurts a lot sometimes but I guess id rather be hurt then nothing at all. Ill let this be a reminder of how we shouldn't let our emotions get all crazy!
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New Member
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Mar 9, 2010, 02:26 PM
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Sounds like you're doing quite well. I started lurking on these forums after my break up. A lot of good advices here.
Here's a little background info on my situation:
Dated my GF since I was in HS. This was my second serious relationship. I was with my first for 2 years and she left me for another guy. Then I ended with this girl for more than 7 years. She ended recently telling me she doesn't know if she loves me anyone and it may be caused by the fact that she's never been with anybody else (I guess emotionally and physically). And she's not certain as to whether I am the "one" for one to spend the rest of her life with. It was a bit easier as this wasn't my first lost, but still a huge blow cause I was at a different stage in life and was really thinking about the future.
I haven't really done the NC rule yet as all my friends are linked to her. Secondly, I am very close to her family. I've decided to keep in touch with her family due to personal reasons that I've decided to not disclose. I know the way I'm handling isn't the best, but I think It'll work out in the end.
GL with your end.
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Junior Member
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Mar 9, 2010, 02:34 PM
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Listen to these folks because believe me... they give great advise! I've been through quite an ordeal and they shown me that you have to be happy with yourself and be your own person first. Don't let her be a part of you the rest of your life because that's exactly what is going to happen if you close yourself off from the possibilities because of your experience with her... It's a hard thing to do, but move on and don't stop loving. It's who you are so don't let her change you...
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Junior Member
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Mar 9, 2010, 02:53 PM
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Sounds to me that dating women is a waste of time. Seems to me that people just can't be happy with what they got. Its really sad that people don't stay in love... Really pisses me off. But there is hope... As I would think there is a woman out there who doesn't fall out of love when they fall in love...
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Ultra Member
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Mar 9, 2010, 03:42 PM
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 Originally Posted by Adapa
Sounds to me that dating women is a waste of time. Seems to me that people just can't be happy with what they got. Its really sad that people dont stay in love... Really pisses me off. But there is hope... As i would think there is a woman out there who doesnt fall out of love when they fall in love...
Sometimes we can all feel that this is the case but IT'S NOT.
Most of us go through the trials and tribulations of dating and Relationships until you find THE ONE , so just learn from the one's that don't work and remember just because 2 people don't necessarily get on and can't live with each other doesn't make either of them a bad person.
Just be happy with yourself and the rest will fall into place when you least expect it.
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Expert
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Mar 9, 2010, 04:02 PM
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Originally Posted by Adapa
Sounds to me that dating women is a waste of time. Seems to me that people just can't be happy with what they got. Its really sad that people don't stay in love... Really pisses me off. But there is hope... As I would think there is a woman out there who doesn't fall out of love when they fall in love...
Its funny how we feel like this when we go through a break up, I know I did, but when your ready, and look around, you will try it again, trust me.
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Junior Member
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Mar 13, 2010, 12:45 PM
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So... my ex messaged me on face book. She messaged me cause I had this on my comment:
Let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth. ~1 John 3:18
So she took the time to message me on face book:
1 If I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but do not have love, I have become a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 If I have the gift of prophecy, and know all mysteries and all knowledge; and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. 3 And if I give all my possessions to feed the poor, and if I surrender my body to be burned, but do not have love, it profits me nothing.
4 Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, 5 does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, 6 does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; 7 bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
8 Love never fails; but if there are gifts of prophecy, they will be done away; if there are tongues, they will cease; if there is knowledge, it will be done away. 9 For we know in part and we prophesy in part; 10 but when the perfect comes, the partial will be done away. 11 When I was a child, I used to speak like a child, think like a child, reason like a child; when I became a man, I did away with childish things. 12 For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face; now I know in part, but then I will know fully just as I also have been fully known. 13 But now faith, hope, love, abide these three; but the greatest of these is love.
That's all she said. . HER. I AM OVER THIS. WHY THE HELL DID SHE BREAK NO CONTACT! HER.
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Uber Member
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Mar 14, 2010, 12:20 AM
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Delete her from FB.
That will stop all confusing messages.
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Junior Member
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Mar 14, 2010, 07:01 AM
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We are not friends on face book. I had my comments off privacy dumb me.
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Junior Member
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Mar 14, 2010, 11:30 AM
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You man, it took me about 2 months of NC to finally have the strength to delete her off Facebook, because I was soooo concerned about her "feelings" and being the "immature" one and deleting her, but then when she posted a pic of her and the new BF on her profile... I was like WTFlip? Im an idiot being played like a foooool!! So bammmmm deleted that chik instantly!! Everybody plays the fool, there's no exception to the rule, it may be factual it may be cruel, but everybody plays the fool.
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Junior Member
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Mar 14, 2010, 01:10 PM
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 Originally Posted by pureorganic
ya man, it took me about 2 months of NC to finally have the strength to delete her off facebook, because i was soooo concerned about her "feelings" and being the "immature" one and deleting her, but then when she posted a pic of her and the new BF on her profile.... i was like WTFlip? Im an idiot being played like a foooool!!! so bammmmm deleted that chik instantly!!! everybody plays the fool, theres no exception to the rule, it may be factual it may be cruel, but everybody plays the fool.
Yeah... She's acting all mature now, calling me a child and not a man cause I block her from my life. But... yet she is the one who broke no contact. I told her to ONLY e-mail me with your accomplishments LATER in life. I am not running or hiding, I just don't have any desire to communicate with her after how she treated me. She's acting all grown up but she's the one who broke up with me ON THE PHONE right before I was about to leave the house to go see her. How mature is that? No spine.
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Ultra Member
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Mar 14, 2010, 03:08 PM
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Who care's if she broke No Contact , the important thing is that you keep it up.
Delete her FB message , build a bridge and get over it.
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Junior Member
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Mar 14, 2010, 07:14 PM
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 Originally Posted by friend4u178
Who care's if she broke No Contact , the important thing is that you keep it up.
Delete her FB message , build a bridge and get over it.
I was going to write back but then I was like... She doesn't deserve to have a conversation with me. The sad thing is... the first message she says to me after 2 months is a freaking bible quote... Pretty freaking crazy if you ask me.
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Uber Member
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Mar 14, 2010, 11:28 PM
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Bump in the road-ignore and keep moving on.
It doesn't really matter anymore,does it?
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Junior Member
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Mar 19, 2010, 01:20 PM
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Its starting to get nice out. And I am starting to feel a of a whole lot better. I think Ill do some spring cleaning in my brain and sweep out the dust and throw some memories away.
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