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    sazb's Avatar
    sazb Posts: 2, Reputation: 0
    New Member
     
    #1

    Feb 24, 2010, 08:03 AM
    I need him back!
    Well I've hard a boyfriend that was 'different' from all the other idiots I've dated. & I really thought he's be special. I once cheated on him with another boy that I really used to fancy however I did come clean with my boyfriend and told him straight away, and he did gave me another chance. But then I had to find out that then he cheated on me once with another girl and I spoke to him about it. And we sorted it out. Now two months into the relationship (I know its not long) he broke up with me, using ' I found out about your past' as an excuse. Now I am not proud of my past at all but it can't be undone. Now I've tried speaking to him about it. And told him exactly how felt and how hurt I am. But he said it doesn't change the situation. Now the break up is a bit of a shock to me because he isn't exactly one of the 'popular' boys and quite a lot of boys are after me and he knows that, even his own friends, so I don't see what would make him want to leave me (hope I don't sound cocky) But I was really nice to him and gave him good/true sincere loving after he gave me a second chance.. Now I really need some advice. And please don't say that 'he isn't worth it and that' because I have honestly heard that so many times and it doesn't make me feel any better.. HELP please people xx
    Romefalls19's Avatar
    Romefalls19 Posts: 4,739, Reputation: 1130
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    #2

    Feb 24, 2010, 08:06 AM

    Stop talking to him and allowing him to keep entering your healing process. Read the stickies at the top of the forum for help and a guide to how to handle NC
    dynocompe's Avatar
    dynocompe Posts: 331, Reputation: 56
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    #3

    Feb 24, 2010, 08:28 AM

    If you heard he isn't worth it so many times, how many times do you need to hear it before it clues in? Sorry to be harsh, but usually when you hear something repeatily by different people,there is often truth to it!
    amicon's Avatar
    amicon Posts: 6,066, Reputation: 1911
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    #4

    Feb 24, 2010, 08:32 AM

    Two months and you both cheated?
    Sorry,but it's over for a reason and you need to start moving on.
    Imabadman's Avatar
    Imabadman Posts: 303, Reputation: 135
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    #5

    Feb 24, 2010, 08:35 AM

    You both sound a bit immature and dysfunctional. Sorry… just how I read it.

    It's hard to build a relationship in a 2 month span, that's more like a fling. I'm just speculating but I think you're probably more concerned with that fact that he dumped you than you are with him. Are you sure your 'desire' isn't just your pride/ego being hurt?
    sam1590's Avatar
    sam1590 Posts: 4, Reputation: -2
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    #6

    Feb 24, 2010, 08:39 AM

    Okay so I don't think anyone's helped you at all so far... you need to stop talking to him its not going to work. Now its time to be strong. You can't talk him into seeing the change you said you've made now its time to show him. Show him your not who you were anymore don't date anyone else don't flirt with anyone else make it known that the only one you want is him... do this for no more then 3 months if it doesn't work its really over. And you could pm me and I'll try and help you with that too.
    Devorameira's Avatar
    Devorameira Posts: 2,461, Reputation: 981
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    #7

    Feb 24, 2010, 08:59 AM
    He was only using your past as an excuse to break it off. You really need to face the fact that your relationship is over and move on. You are worthy of having a great guy who treats you right.
    sazb's Avatar
    sazb Posts: 2, Reputation: 0
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    #8

    Feb 24, 2010, 09:13 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by sam1590 View Post
    okay so i dont think anyones helped you at all so far.... you need to stop talking to him its not gonna work. now its time to be strong. you can't talk him into seeing the change you said you've made now its time to show him. show him your not who you were anymore dont date anyone else dont flirt with anyone else make it known that the only one you want is him..... do this for no more then 3 months if it doesn't work its really over. and you could pm me and i'll try and help you with that too.
    Aww thank you. I really found that beneficial & sorry I could help but notice and point this out.. his name is sam as well :L
    But yeah. I know it has honestly been a short while, but I've known him for over 5 years and I become really close to him.. and its really not like me to fall over a guy like this. :'/
    TrueFaith's Avatar
    TrueFaith Posts: 1,202, Reputation: 313
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    #9

    Feb 24, 2010, 09:17 AM

    Go no contact with him. Its over
    And that part about Why did he dump me when he isn't that hot but the rest are after me.

    Sorry to tell you this but being popular does not really have much to do with it.

    Sounds like you guys are in school anyway it's a good chance for you to learn what you want out of a relationship and if you are ready for one.
    In my mind you cheating on someone just goes to show how not ready you are, for a relationship

    My advice Go no contact with this guy
    And work on what you want out of life

    Best of luck
    sam1590's Avatar
    sam1590 Posts: 4, Reputation: -2
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    #10

    Feb 24, 2010, 11:22 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by sazb View Post
    aww thank you. i really found that benificial & sorry i could help but notice and point this out.. his name is sam aswell :L
    But yeah. i know it has honestly been a short while, but i've known him for over 5 years and i become really close to him.. and its really not like me to fall over a guy like this. :'/
    Thank you for appreciating my advice. And to all you who think its bad advice please learn to say something other then "get over it" and "stop talking to him" because that quite honestly is filler advice that apllies to all people and all broken relationship issues maybe you should try to actually put yourselves in the askers shoes and realize your advice is redundant.
    Romefalls19's Avatar
    Romefalls19 Posts: 4,739, Reputation: 1130
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    #11

    Feb 24, 2010, 12:33 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by sam1590 View Post
    thank you for appreciating my advice. and to all you who think its bad advice please learn to say something other then "get over it" and "stop talking to him" because that quite honestly is filler advice that apllies to all people and all broken relationship issues maybe you should try to actually put yourselfs in the askers shoes and realize your advice is redundant.

    I have been in the OP's shoes, everyone that comes here has been. Trying to change or prove yourself to someone isn't love. Love isn't a game, it's not about trying to fit into someone's idea of a perfect person it's being who you are and them loving you for that. They both have cheated, and as far as I'm concerned, cheating is a deal breaker for any relationship. You can come here and say we are wrong for saying not to talk to him, but our methods work a lot more than yours do, and we have facts to back that up
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #12

    Feb 26, 2010, 09:15 PM

    LOL, never fails that sometimes the only good advice, is the advice you like.

    Go ahead, and follow it, and come back and tell us how wrong we were.

    Good Luck, and I mean that.
    Gemini54's Avatar
    Gemini54 Posts: 2,871, Reputation: 1116
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    #13

    Feb 26, 2010, 09:48 PM
    Now the break up is a bit of a shock to me because he isn't exactly one of the 'popular' boys and quite a lot of boys are after me and he knows that, even his own friends, so I don't see what would make him want to leave me
    Well, clearly you won't have any problems replacing him. Methinks you just want him because he doesn't want you. He cheated on you and now he's not interested. Pretty obvious what's going on, I reckon.

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