[Vivya Chirwa]

I got married some five years ago. We have been blessed with a son however my wife seem not to trust me in any of my actions. My wife always suspects that I am cheating on her despite the fact that I am always transparent in my actions.

[Jake2008]

Jealousy is the mark of a person who is insecure, and those insecurities lead to irrational thoughts.

Jealousy is also often marked by fear. Fears are not an easy thing to identify when you are concentrating on finding fault with another person to justify them.

Suggest that the two of you attend counselling, so that she can freely talk about why she feels the way she does.

It is unfair and unbalanced when you are made to feel responsible for her being miserable and accusatory. This will wear you down and tear the relationship down.

Whatever her issues are that have her seeing you as a cheater, when you are not, needs to be uncovered and dealt with.

[talaniman]

Your wife seems to have issues that needs to be dealt with, either by a doctor or a counselor. The hard part is getting her to agree, but I think if you press upon how important this is to trust you she may agree.

Worth a try any way.

But what does transparent mean, that you have female friends that you party with? That you have females you text? All these could be seen as contributing factors in the way she sees things, even if your not cheating.

[Devorameira]

I’m not sure if there is jealousy involved or if she has been so deeply hurt in the past that she is unable to let it go of it. When something really bad happens to you, it is sometimes hard to let go of those “doomsday” feelings. If the insecurities aren’t addressed, they just seem to build and build while waiting for the ax to fall on the relationship. It's an awful way for her to live too.

You need to communicate with your wife and try to get to the bottom of the trust issues. If she won’t talk openly to you, counseling is the only answer. Would she be open to that?