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    WonderWorld48's Avatar
    WonderWorld48 Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
    New Member
    		  
    #1

    Jan 31, 2010, 11:49 PM
    Inexperienced boyfriend, sexual
    New into a newer relationship... wonderful man... very happy in all areas...
    Question is, why does he not use his hands to stimulate or guide himself in during intercourse? He simply pokes around until it happens or I put it in. During long make out sessions (dressed) he does not do this either. He only rubs with his genitalia when aroused. What is going on?
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
    Jobs & Parenting Expert
    		  
    #2

    Feb 1, 2010, 12:08 AM

    Ask him.
    Gemini54's Avatar
    Gemini54 Posts: 2,871, Reputation: 1116
    Ultra Member
    		  
    #3

    Feb 1, 2010, 01:07 AM
    Talk to him about what you'd like - he probably does it from habit. Habits can be changed. Put his hands on his penis and guide them in, if that's what you'd like. Talk about it!
    WonderWorld48's Avatar
    WonderWorld48 Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
    New Member
    		  
    #4

    Feb 1, 2010, 01:39 AM

    I had originally written a bit more profound explanation of my "I have no idea if this is a problem or something else .... " and the server logged out on me and deleted the "whole picture" of sorts.
    I am recently divorced (15 years) in the last year. Obviously, intimacy is pretty well set (basics anyway) and I absolutely get that this is NEW to us both...
    It is just a "gut" question of it... that there is a disconnect between...
    Very passionate and excited about each other... and attraction...
    Here's my point: if you are capable of having intercourse... why wouldn't you be capable of simply "touching your partner's genitalia" and I mean NOT AT ALL!
    Huh?

    And yes, I do help out... help him "in" so to speak... (Starting to sound like a Sienfeldt Episode... LOL! Elaine: "He took IT out!")

    Anyway... It sounds so cold what I wrote initially... basically... I want to know what I can do... and if there is a possible underlying issue I need to be cognicent and compassionate or cautious or... I don't know...
    Men... help me out here (and don't be gross... or state the obvious "to do's"... )
    Thanks!
    LJDK's Avatar
    LJDK Posts: 281, Reputation: 25
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    #5

    Feb 1, 2010, 08:05 AM

    Tell him that you like it when he holds his cock, and rubs it up and down across your .

    Soon he will get the feel of where the spot is. Keep in mind, maybe he is like me... I have very little sensation on my head, so I cannot feel anything when doing such things... but still its hard to not notice something slipping away.
    Point is he might hurt you when he rubds to hard.

    Otherwise, tell him he needs to practise to do it himself, make it fun. Why so serious?
    neverme's Avatar
    neverme Posts: 1,430, Reputation: 270
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    #6

    Feb 1, 2010, 08:08 AM

    Is the issue that you feel he may have a problem with touching your genitalia and therefore you feel something is lacking in your arousal and it seems to be concentrated on penetration alone?
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