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emilio7 · Jan 17, 2010, 12:58 AM

Hey y'all this is my first post. All right to start my ex and I dated for a year and about 3 months. At the beginning of the summer '09 she dumped me saying "she wasn't ready for anything serious" and that "she needed to be single". During the summer when I would rarely see her she would act funny and almost act jealous towards me.

Around the beginning of the fall semester I confronted her on her "mix signals" and she completely and totally denied it, saying that "she wwas moving on" and "trying to see what else is out there."... I took that as a hint and cut off all contact with her (I would only see her at tailgates on saturdays and I would make meaningless conversation with her).

Then the day after her 21st birthday came and everything has been turned upside down since. The morning after her 21st birthday I was in my accounting class when I got a text saying "you didn't text me yesterday?". Now the day before her birthday (Saturday) I ran into her INPERSON and wished her a happy birthday. She basically went on to say that she was hurt/surprised that I didn't call or text her on her birthday... then started to spill her guts about how I had forgotten she existed and had completely moved on with girls, while she hadn't. I offered to meet up with her in person and talk about this and she replied "I'm not ready to act on anything yet and stir things up"??

Ever since then it's been a weird/confusing turn of events and most recently today I was driving with one of my friends when I saw her with another guy driving her car.

Yosomoton213 · Jan 17, 2010, 01:15 AM

It seems that she doesn't want to be in a relationship or move in that direction yet, but doesn't want you to move on either. It comes back to the adage of "crap or get off the pot". Because she doesn't want to get back together, leave this turd mountain of a situation and get off the pot. Continue what you are doing, back to no/trivial contact. Keep conversation short, and like you said, meaningless. Who knows who that other guy driving her car is, and at this point, who cares. Leave her in the dust.

emilio7 · Jan 17, 2010, 01:25 AM

I see where you're coming from. It's just a very weird situation, because if she would have never said those things after her birthday I wouldn't be in this position where I feel idle. I don't see the point in contacting her because it's all meaningless conversation that doesn't help our situation.

The last time we talked about everything was over a month ago and she said "she wasn't ready to stir things up" but at the same time she called our situation "very complicated"... I almost feel like I'm dealing with a completely different person.

amicon · Jan 17, 2010, 01:32 AM

Stay away from further confusion by doing NC whenever possible. If you bump into her be polite but busy.

Let her sort out her life and continue moving on with yours.

emilio7 · Jan 17, 2010, 01:37 AM

I haven't spoken to her since christmas day and haven't seen her since November (outside of what happen today)

Would it be a douchebag or move to delete her from Facebook?

Ithappenstoall · Jan 17, 2010, 01:39 AM

Do it if there is temptation, if there isn't then don't. If she asks tell its somehting you need to do

emilio7 · Jan 17, 2010, 01:42 AM

I gotcha.

I was telling my roommate I'm truly not expecting us to date ever again. But, I would like to talk to her to see why she thinks it's fair/right to play these games with someone after all of this time. Especially when she only said a few months back that she was "moving forward" and "didn't want to be tied down"

amicon · Jan 17, 2010, 02:00 AM

Why would you want to open that can of worms?
It doesn't matter what she does-she's your ex.

emilio7 · Jan 17, 2010, 02:09 AM

I really can't explain it... in some cases I want her back because I'm somewhat still into her. But in reality I don't see us getting back together because as of now we don't talk.

She was also the one who opened all of this up by spilling her guts and saying I had forgotten she existed , etc.

amicon · Jan 17, 2010, 02:20 AM

Then go with your head-ie you don't see the two of you getting back together-and don't worry about whatever games she might or might not be playing.

emilio7 · Jan 17, 2010, 02:25 AM

Okay dude

Jake2008 · Jan 17, 2010, 05:25 AM

While it would be satisfying to know, you are much further ahead to just accept that to do so, would indeed open up a can of worms.

She can only play games with you if you play back.

Next time she tosses the ball, let it go into the ditch.