[Ithappenstoall]

Thanks amicon talk to you soon


Really feeling down about this... want to know it will be okay and that she is just sad and not anything else. I hope it is her emotions and current state talking, and that she is not doubting the possibility of this working out

[Ithappenstoall]

It has been a living nightmare today my insecurities surfacing... hate this

[Ithappenstoall]

6 months and going strong with the long distance, we have had ups and down but it going forward.. owsh me luck

[someone13]

Goodluck with your long distance relation. I failed mine... but maybe you two are luckier :) keep her entertained, communicate and remind her from time to time that 1 and 1/2 year is not that long

[Devorameira]

I know you can't always get away from your job to make your visits with her, but can't you pay for her to come visit you occasionally? LDR's at really hard emotional times and you need to see each other at least 3-4 times a year.

[Ithappenstoall]

Right I already this visit in December and I hoping to get a break in a few months time, hopefully it will be good. She tells me she gets lonely, I understand that completely and hope it just her reaction and not a sign things are going to the worst

[amicon]

Stay strong and keep up all levels of communication.
And try not to worry too much!

[Ithappenstoall]

Right, I need to be strong in order not to be needy... Love makes you do crazy things. I get paranoid knowing I am working in a foreign country and don't have much of a social life and she is still finishing college and has one.

[amicon]

If you trust her that shouldn't be a problem.
What can you do to broaden your circle of friends where you are?

[Ithappenstoall]

That's a good question... work all day I don't know where to start

[Romefalls19]

Start at work then, or join a gym and make friends their. What country are you working in?

[I wish]

It sounds like other than work, you're not very occupied, so you have a lot of time to think about how much you miss you. What you need to do is get busy.

Check out the two links that Tal provided in response #3. It gives great insight on how you should each build your own lives, as opposed to being dependent on one another.

[Ithappenstoall]

OK guys things took a turn for the worst... we spoke yesterday and have been having the same talk about what we wanted in life. We both want the same things, but she wants them before. She finishes school in a year and half and I will be back by then. She wants to get married then and I told her that we don't have enough financial stability right now but I want these things with her. On top of this we have the whole religion issue where she tells me that she wants to be with me and that she appreciates all the things I want to do but its to hard ans he cannot lie to god

I told her that I wanted a family with her, but in good time. She wants to get married early and young ( mind you when she graduates she will be 23, she still has plenty of time). I told her I am back in 1.5 years and then we are living together and then 1.5 more and we get start this process. She says that she wanted to do these things before but now that the religion issue is there she can't do it. She is muslim and I am christian, I told her that I would on paper have all the formalities like she wants them and that I will support her in all the traditions that she has (because living in an arab country and growing up in one, I know them inside out). She says that that is great but she knows that its wrong. Its wrong in the eyes of god, and she cant

She tells me she is so lonely and sad and tells me that all she wants is to be with me right there right now but sad because I can't and won't be, which makes things even worst in my head, I keep thinking of her being with someone else and can't see it. We were seriously perfect ofr each other and everyone said so, and its only the reiligon that made this all happen. What shoould I do? We love each other and its hard not to communicate when you are in love. Being far aways makes it even worst because you can't even see them

[amicon]

When's your next leave?

[Ithappenstoall]

April or end of march

[amicon]

So you need to keep your mind busy and not paint any worst case scenarios or you won't have much of a life till then.
I assume you love,trust and miss each other-then trust in that things will be fine,rather than worry your head off. :-)

[Ithappenstoall]

Yeah I need to stay away for a few days and not get needy. She spoke to today and told me love me and what's to work things out, so I need to do something anything to make it work... god

[amicon]

Could she fly out for a minibreak?

[Ithappenstoall]

Right now she is saying that she can't do this anynmore, she loves me but she cannot see how we will move passed the religion issues, I tell her not to think like that and we need to fight this problem together but she keeps saying that she thought and she cannot see how it will happen. I want her to be with me and she wants me to be with her, but she just can't seem to be thinking positive. Every time I tell why do you think that or think like this and she says, because it's the reality of things. What to do ? Everyday she contacts and tell me she is sad, I tell don't think like that I love and I want nothing more than to be with you, she tells me so do I but I cant, and I keep trying to convince her that we can, or at least let us explore all options.

[Ithappenstoall]

Why is she being so stubborn and closing her mind on this, she saiys she is so sad, I always try and reassure her but I don't know if that the good idea, I tell her I love her and want nothing more than be with her and you need to give me time to figure out if I can think of the possibility of for example changing religions, (religion is not important for me but it represents my families background so that's something to consider)