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    tiinaa's Avatar
    tiinaa Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Dec 23, 2009, 07:52 AM
    Why he said that when I asked him does he loves me?
    After 9 months with him see each other oftene yesterday night I text him and I asked him why you never say that's you loves me, because I always say it to u, the answer was have nice holidays and take care when I asked him why that was his answer he said that I'm stressing him too much with my love and he said loves come by time please does this guy love me I don't know what to do I really love him how can make him love me and care about me I always ask about him text him I need your advice please help me .
    Romefalls19's Avatar
    Romefalls19 Posts: 4,739, Reputation: 1130
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    #2

    Dec 23, 2009, 08:06 AM

    Maybe he doesn't want to say it because he isn't completely in love right now. Not everyone falls in love quickly. I dated a girl for over a year and wasn't in love
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #3

    Dec 23, 2009, 08:30 AM

    You sound so desperate to have him feel as you do. He doesn't, so calm down, and slow down, so you can enjoy what you do have. You will overwhelm him if you don't. Your coming on way to strong.
    Misshersomuch's Avatar
    Misshersomuch Posts: 84, Reputation: 12
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    #4

    Dec 23, 2009, 03:05 PM

    If there's one thing I'm learned, even though I'm still very young, it's that you can't make anyone love you if they don't already.

    Just respect that he's not ready to say something like that and don't worry about it. Either that, or talk it through with him, but not over messages in that case.

    You're not saying anything about your age or previous relationships, put perhaps it's hard for him to commit because of past relationships?

    One other thing I've learned is to not analyze everything too much. I know it's hard, but don't put too much into this and don't think too much about it.

    You should really just respect what he says and give him time. Back a little off, and respect his wishes - don't push him, that won't do any good.

    If you really can't live with this situation and insecurity, the best thing you can do is to talk with him. But if you do, make sure that you're not judging him at all!

    I wish you the best of luck and a merry christmas!
    Cat1864's Avatar
    Cat1864 Posts: 8,007, Reputation: 3687
    Marriage Expert
    		  
    #5

    Dec 23, 2009, 03:35 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by tiinaa View Post
    After 9 months with him see each other oftene yesterday night I text him and I asked him why you never say thats you loves me, because I always say it to u, the answer was have nice holidays and take care when I asked him why that was his answer he said that im stressing him to much with my love and he said loves come by time please does this guy love me I dont know what to do I really love him how can make him love me and care about me I always ask about him text him I need your advice please help me .
    One of the hardest lessons in life is that you can not make someone feel or care for you more than he does on his own. You can show him how you feel and care about him, but you have to be careful that you don't overwhelm him.

    Sometimes, the best way to show someone that you love and care for him is to give him space and time for himself and his family and friends. At the same time, you take time for yourself and your friends and family. It makes both of you stronger people and better able to handle the ups and downs of life and relationships.
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