[Jake2008]

Clough is so right. While you may feel it's not worth the effort to do what needs to be done to see a counsellor, I truly hope you do. You are not the first, nor the last that is going through a rough spot.

Sometimes, being in this depressed place, it is easier to remain there, than it is making what seems to be, a huge effort to get your life back on track. I understand, as I've also been off and on medication for PTSD among other things.

When you aren't feeling good about yourself, nothing feels right. School, friends, the future. Being alone, and/or choosing to be alone, is the lonliest place on earth I think.

Not to mention that you lost a very good friend, and we've seen that many times here in this community. The results are devastating. Losses are enormous, and it is hard to cope with the hole left in your heart, and in your life. Being depressed on top of that, only adds to the pain of grieving.

I do hope you will make just that one effort this week, get your papers in order, arrange to see a Doctor, and be really upfront and honest about all the symptoms you note in your original post. Added up, and talked about, I'm am 100% confident that there is help for you, and you will feel better getting through these days.

Please let us know how you made out.

[Clough]

Thank you, Jake2008!

I couldn't spread the "love" to you so soon after already giving it to you tonight. But, thanks for the confirmation and also the very sound advice that you give!

[ForeverSearching]

I had a really bad night last night. I was alone and I broke down and I couldn't stop crying, and it's the lowest I've felt yet. I went up to the on-campus doctors today, and they agreed to see me. I broke down in front of her, and explained what was wrong, and she told me nothing was wrong and that I was fine. She told me to wash my face and leave. :(

[Soulbeliever666]

I'm pleased to hear the sit helped. I think the constant reassurance is the key for him he needs support and it sounds like he'll get all of that from you I guess you'll just have to keep telling him that you don't want every thing because what you really want his him and just keep telling him that maybe it will help him.
The Doctor at your on-campus sounds like.. . Your better off going to a proper GP or nurse but it might be wise to report her for negligence because she's clearly not doing her job she could have sorted out counseling for you etc but that's up to you. Why don't you check out the counseling at uni ? When I was in college I was able to see one every week and it helped because for a while I could break down and let it all out knowing it will never leave the room felt kind of safe.
Just try and keep positive pet I know its easier said then done sometimes

[ForeverSearching]

I went to the counselling service first, but they have no appointments for this week, but they took my number and said they would call if there was a cancellation.
Seeing the on-campus doctor, hasn't encouraged me to go and see someone for help because I feel I won't be taken seriously, but I can't take it anymore, I just want the hopelessness and the headaches to go away. I want the anxious feeling to go away, but if doctors are just going to tell me there is nothing wrong I don't know what else to do. :(

[ForeverSearching]

I can't do it anymore. I feel so unbelievably alone. Ive lost my best friend, he's gone, and there's a big void and I don't know what to do. My head hurts so much. I don't know what to do. Hes refusing to talk to me at all and I don't know where to turn. Im all alone :'(

[Jake2008]

What you do is, you don't give up-ever! This time in your life is only temporary, and seriously, you will survive, and go on to enjoy your life again.

Try writing out a list of things you want to accomplish in a day that will keep you busy. Simple things to start, like: 1. Walk for one mile. 2. grocery shop. 3. Clean your room and catch up with laundry.

Don't overdo it, but while you are feeling so miserable, things are probably piling up.

A little bit of normal in your life might help you, if you can keep even a bit more organized, and busier.

It is important that you take some steps to help yourself. Do things that should have been done, but in an organized way. You will feel a sense of accomplishment, and realize that life goes on, the jobs nobody wants to do have to get done.

Increase your list for the next day to maybe include checking out some volunteer positions. If you have the time to cry all night, you can offer a few hours at the local humane society, or shelter.

Give more, and expect less from others. Accept that you have been given a rough road, but maybe there is a bigger purpose for you, and where it leads may be the last place you thought you'd ever go.

Meet people through volunteering, enjoy your time, and feel good about giving back a bit. Consider tutoring for special needs students, call the Salvation Army and volunteer to help deliver Christmas baskets to needy families. So many opportunities.

Try to open your life up a little bit, rather than shutting it down. Force yourself to face a new day with a smile on your face, and do just a little tiny bit, to put your problems aside, and take in a bigger piece of the world.

You will feel better, more in control, and happy with even the smallest of accomplishments.

The hard part is deciding to get started, but once you do, there will be no turning back.

[ForeverSearching]

I came home today, and went to my proper doctor. She was really good, and she sat down and spoke to me properly. She's diagnosed me with depression, and has put me on antie-depressants, and has suggested I have some kind of counselling earlier in the new year. I hope now I will be able to get back to myself and that I will all help.

[Jake2008]

Good for you! I'm glad you went. I think you're right- it will certainly help. Counselling in the new year is a good recommendation as well. Keep us posted.