Check out some similar questions!

Something_Here · Dec 11, 2009, 04:28 AM

It's like Friend4U said, if she wanted to say something, it wouldn't have been with a blank email. Either it was a mistake, or she's fishing for some kind of response. Just ignore it in either case, you'll feel better soon enough.

emopunk7 · Dec 11, 2009, 11:01 PM

Well, I didn't feel so good today. I actually cried for the third time in almost 3 months. I have not responded to the email. I will not go backwards... I suffered enough.

vanheart · Dec 11, 2009, 11:24 PM

"I will not go backwards...I suffered enough."

That's exactly the right attitude. Keep it up.

amicon · Dec 12, 2009, 01:23 AM

There's only one way to go-forward. And you're going to continue on that road.

emopunk7 · Dec 12, 2009, 01:59 AM

For the first time, I actually reread my entire thread. With the emotional dust mostly settled and my great progress, I actually noticed a few things. In the beginning I thought everyone was against me but it was the total opposite! Everyone has been trying very hard to help me. Cat, thank you for being there since the beginning and giving me the best advice. Same for you TMan! Thank you, IWish, Amicon, Paxe, Friend4U, ohsohappy, justwantfair, and vanheart!

I have been doing a tremendous job in my recovery. I have continued with my band, continued working out, fixing my room, hanging out with friends, registered for school, manage to focus on my job, and not holding anger and being polite and great and humble to everyone as usual. I am happy to know that I can still be myself. Everyday is a step forward. I am happy for these things. I just want to do so much right now. I think I'm understanding everything better and that this is for the best and for my experience because there is something better waiting for me. I think everything happens for a reason and this was a preparation for something better.

amicon · Dec 12, 2009, 02:05 AM

That's great Emo,I'm proud of you. Cyberhugs. :-)

emopunk7 · Dec 12, 2009, 05:28 AM

Oh no! I was going through my email and there were pictures of her and us! I'm scared if this will draw me back for a while now... We looked so happy and she was so pretty... uh oh! Why did I want to keep looking at it and stare at it?

amicon · Dec 12, 2009, 05:36 AM

Delete the pictures. Delete anything that draws you back.
What's not there can't hurt you.
Stay strong now.

emopunk7 · Dec 12, 2009, 06:54 AM

OK... deleted! I'm okay!

emopunk7 · Dec 14, 2009, 09:45 PM

Its been 3 months and I still think of my ex and it hurts sometimes. Surely she is not feeling this way or else this wouldn't be happening. What am I to do? It's not too bad. I have had a lot of progress and I'm sure there will be more but I don't want to go through this anymore. Also fear of another relationship going bad and so on. Help...

vanheart · Dec 14, 2009, 09:55 PM

Its OK buddy.

Those feelings will pass if you control them & let them.

Don't worry about anything like what she's thinking. Especially who's next.

Get yourself on track first. Learn from this one.

Realize this is over. That's a good emotional start.

Listen to yourself in your previous post abut recovery. Keep riding that.

She's not going to hurt you any longer.

The past is the past.

Now what?

friend4u178 · Dec 14, 2009, 10:32 PM

Originally Posted by emopunk7

In the beginning I thought everyone was against me but it was the total opposite! Everyone has been trying very hard to help me.

LOL... don't worry Emo you aren't the first and certainly won't be the last.

Point is , now that the emotional dust is starting to settle you can actually to see it :)

emopunk7 · Dec 14, 2009, 10:32 PM

I surely have accepted it's over and I don't even want her back. Hence, the no contact. I just think of cute things we did, for example:
1. She would raise her hand to speak in a cute way playing around and I would select her and she would say "You Cute!". Then I would raise my hand and she would select me and I'd say, "You Cute!"
2. I would tell her to jum and she used to do this cute little jump. The pictures she took were sooo cute and she looked so happy and innocent.

I just don't get it. Since she started working, she didn't want to see me as much. I can still remember how she would sneak smoking so that I wouldn't find out. She would get upset and either ignore me or throw me out of her house or curse me or swing at me or throw things at my car or slam my door or yell at me in public. She would always wonder who text me and would never believe me. If I were home and she thought I was in my car she would say "prove it" and I would so that she knows I never lie to her. She always thought I was trying to talk or look at other girls and I always reassured her that it's only her because it really was! She would always say she doesn't find any celebrity sexy except me. But I was like c'mon, can't we be honest and be friends a bit and not so strict? I would tell her the ones pretty to me were beyonce and sandra bullock. She would get upset and I'd say but you are prettier and sexier. I don't get it. I never went out behind her back even once. If I were caught once, I wouldn't do it again but yet she did it four times and I still feel bad for doing it back cause that's not like me. Still just for that one time she broke up with me. Even throughout all this, call me stupid, but I'd still accept it all just to select her raised hand and hear her say, "You Cute!".

vanheart · Dec 14, 2009, 10:42 PM

Rant on.

Everything about your post is about her. She, she, she...

And celebs.. hehhehe.
Plus she went behind your back 4 times. And you still are worrying about her.

What about you, now.

emopunk7 · Dec 20, 2009, 04:58 PM

I have been wanting to put an update for a while but couldn't push myself to do it. Here is an update. I have been doing a lot better as far as feeling pain this week. I wake up and I don't really feel anything anymore. Though at times she crosses my mind and I still get sad a bit. I keep thinking its my fault. I wonder what things I could have done differently and saved a pretty good relationship. I don't know anymore. I often wonder that maybe its not my fault since I did tell her 4 times before to please not do things behind my back and lie about it. And every time she did it, she said its because she barely gets to hang out with her friends. Yet she never even mentioned about wanting to hang out with anyone so that always confused me. Then when I would get upset about her lying then and only then would she bring up that she never gets to hang out with friends or something along those lines. It confuses me and I would tell her I have no idea what she means because I'm only bothered that she lied and not that she is hanging out. I never questioned her cheating. That just always confused me how every time she lied then she pulls that same card of "i don't hang out with friends". Why not say hey I'm going to go out with so and so today. Was that emotional blackmailing?

I remember once she wanted to go to a party where an ex was and I said oh you just want to go to see your ex and she said f... you and hung up. She didn't go to the party that time. Then about 2 years later she says she was going out to a club with friends and her sister and I was like OK cool and have fun. Then another time she was going to hang out with friends and I was like OK cool. She went and I asked for her to call when she got there. I ended up calling her and asked why she didn't call when she got there and that was it. I can't remember anything more drastic than these so I don't see her need to lie. Let alone I always took her out with me and never felt the need to do things without her. Confused.

vanheart · Dec 20, 2009, 05:04 PM

Focus on yourself. Not the whys & what ifs. That's only going to cause more confusion as you are certainly realizing.

The less mental & emotionally energy you spend on her, the better.

Its OK to run all of those past tapes in your mind, but only if you can learn from them & know when to take a break & step back in a clear way.

amicon · Dec 20, 2009, 05:07 PM

Hello confused-do you know you're overthinking the past again? You are doing so much better Emo keep moving forward and don't get hung up blaming yourself for the past.
Look forward to the future.

bswc · Dec 20, 2009, 05:20 PM

Those memories sound real clear in your head as if your brain is processing them all the time. Emo, go buy a ton of brain boots and give yourself a kick in your brain when this virus sets in!

emopunk7 · Dec 20, 2009, 05:29 PM

I get it... but nobody answered my questions... Please friends, answer them or give me your opinion at least. I feel like I wrote my last post for no reason. I need to hear your opinion and talk with you all about it. I have more to say and ask. Please respond. I know I have to keep moving forward and I am. I just want some responses. Talking about it and venting is useful... pLease heLp!

friend4u178 · Dec 20, 2009, 05:31 PM

Emo

If my GF was constantly questioning & badgering me whenever I went somewhere without her I'd get sick of it after a while , a good relationship doesn't require constant answers and you have to learn to trust or it won't work anyway in the long run.

I definitely feel you have some major trust issue's when it comes to this girl , so it's something you should work on before you get into another relationship.

Now stop thinking about this girl , IT'S OVER , and start moving forward again.