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kdogg804 · Dec 11, 2009, 05:19 PM

My wife wants to have a threesome with a guy I work with... I am open to the idea, and she has said she would want to watch me with another woman. How do I ask the other guy to join us in our sexcapade?

kdogg804 · Dec 11, 2009, 05:20 PM

Originally Posted by kdogg804

My wife wants to have a threesome with a guy I work with.... I am open to the idea, and she has said she would want to watch me with another woman. How do I ask the other guy to join us in our sexcapade?

or should I?

J_9 · Dec 11, 2009, 05:23 PM

You don't.

It would make it very awkward at work should something more come of this. You don't want to risk your job in these trying times.

Fr_Chuck · Dec 11, 2009, 05:25 PM

Yes, every time you see him at work, you would remember him with your wife??

ohsohappy · Dec 11, 2009, 05:26 PM

HARSH POST WARNING

You show him a picture of your wife naked and tell him she wants to screw him. And then you get fired for sexual harassment and possibly have your marriage ended after the jealousy finally sets in.. . Fool.

The point of being married is being exclusive and cherishing each other, not passing your spouse around, if you're going to do that, you might as well not be married.

This is so immoral.

I have so much more to say about this, but I'll hold back.

kdogg804 · Dec 11, 2009, 05:28 PM

He does not actually work with me... he works at the same place I do... I actually hardly see him.

ohsohappy · Dec 11, 2009, 05:28 PM

Originally Posted by kdogg804

He does not actually work with me.... he works at the same place I do... I actually hardly see him.

Then go for it, maybe he has an STD, something else all 3 of you can share. :D

J_9 · Dec 11, 2009, 05:28 PM

Doesn't matter.

shazamataz · Dec 11, 2009, 05:30 PM

Originally Posted by ohsohappy

HARSH POST WARNING
The point of being married is being exclusive and cherishing each other, not passing your spouse around, if you're going to do that, you might as well not be married.

This is so immoral.
.

Some people are perfectly fine with having threesomes, sorry ohso but just because that's your opinion doesn't mean it's everyone's.

I myself had had the experience in the past and there weren't any jealousy issues because we completely discussed the rules before it happened and it doesn't mean our relationship is in trouble.

HOWEVER in this case I do agree that it would not be a good idea at all. Not the threesome part but the fact that he works with this other person, if something does happen to go wrong he has to deal with it at work every single day and could possibly end up getting fired.

ohsohappy · Dec 11, 2009, 05:31 PM

Originally Posted by shazamataz

Some people are perfectly fine with having threesomes, sorry ohso but just because that's your opinion doesn't mean it's everyones.

I myself had had the experience in the past and there weren't any jealousy issues because we completely discussed the rules before it happened and it doesn't mean our relationship is in trouble.

HOWEVER in this case I do agree that it would not be a good idea at all. Not the threesome part but the fact that he works with this other person, if something does happen to go wrong he has to deal with it at work every single day and could possibly end up getting fired.

Just a opinion.

J_9 · Dec 11, 2009, 05:33 PM

Shaz, with all due respect, you are the lucky one. I too had an experience such as this and am divorced and two children suffered because of it. Yes, the rules were discussed beforehand, but one other member of the twosome (not me, one of the other two) became obsessed.

So, it is a double edged sword. You're damned if you do... it can have a negative impact, or your damned if you don't... it will keep coming up in the relationship.

You just can't control how another person will feel after the escapade.

Enigma1999 · Dec 11, 2009, 05:35 PM

Hello Kdogg,

Ahhh you are playing with fire... You two really need to sit down and think about it, long and hard. Things that you need to think about are,

:What happens if she decides that she really likes the other man?

:What happens if you like the other woman?

:If you do go through with it with someone you know, how will that effect you afterwards?

:Are you not enough for her?

These are things you guys should discuss. Don't get me wrong, I too have thought about my partner with another while watching... I am only human. However, there's that fine line there that I don't want to cross. If you guys do end up doing this, please make sure that your relationship is strong enough. It seems fine at first, but afterwards there can be that doubt of, is he better than me? Does she want him more than me? So on and so forth.

I wish you luck.

shazamataz · Dec 11, 2009, 05:38 PM

That's more than fair J9, I have known quite a few people who have had threesomes with no problem at all.. however it was always with people they knew quite well so there wasn't an issue of them becoming obsessed.
I myself was involved in a threesome with a very good friend, it wasn't a decision we took lightly but for us it ended up fine and strangely enough we are much closer friends now because of it and there is no awkwardness, but like you said, it doesn't always end that well.

Sorry, it's just a peeve of mine when people say that something I have done is immoral and wrong and I tend to fire up (no offence at all ohso just sayin') I'll take it to the other thread.

J_9 · Dec 11, 2009, 05:40 PM

Originally Posted by Enigma1999

:What happens if you like the other woman?

My case in point. My ex got addicted to the "other woman."

ohsohappy · Dec 11, 2009, 05:43 PM

Originally Posted by shazamataz

That's more than fair J9, I have known quite a few people who have had threesomes with no problem at all.. however it was always with people they knew quite well so there wasn't an issue of them becoming obsessed.
I myself was involved in a threesome with a very good friend, it wasn't a decision we took lightly but for us it ended up fine and strangely enough we are much closer friends now because of it and there is no awkwardness, but like you said, it doesn't always end that well.

Sorry, it's just a peeve of mine when people say that something I have done is immoral and wrong and I tend to fire up (no offence at all ohso just sayin') I'll take it to the other thread.

For clarification, it's more between married couples where it bothers me, because, as I said, it's supposed to be monogomus (or however you spell it)
People who are dating, I have a slightly different view, I don't agree with it, but if it helps test the waters in the relationship for trust, then do what you must.

kdogg804 · Dec 11, 2009, 05:47 PM

The other guy works on a different shift than I do... He does not have an STD... He is a mutual friend, whom we trust. I do not want to ask a RANDOM guy at the bar! We agreed that we need some spice in the bedroom and have decided to do this... We have had an experience with another couple 5 years ago... although we never swapped partners it did bring spice into the bedroom... and other places :-)

ohsohappy · Dec 11, 2009, 05:49 PM

Originally Posted by kdogg804

The other guy works on a different shift than I do... He does not have an STD.

You sure? Did you check his penis? Read his file?

ohsohappy · Dec 11, 2009, 05:53 PM

Comments on this post
Shazamataz agrees: haha now all I can picture is a guy in an office showing off his std-free penis lol

I wave mine around in the office, no biggie. :)

kdogg804 · Dec 11, 2009, 05:55 PM

Actually... we work in EMS... We have tests done MONTHLY due to the high concern of swine flu and all... we get the full work up... thanks anyway for your concern...

ohsohappy · Dec 11, 2009, 05:57 PM

Originally Posted by kdogg804

actually.... we work in EMS... We have tests done MONTHLY due to the high concern of swine flu and all... we get the full work up... thanks anyways for your concern...

You know, aside from the threesome question, You're being very calm about this criticism.

I like you!