[espejuelo]

Hi everyone, I have a issue that I need advise on how to handle... if you read my previous tread about my sickle cell issue, this is still with the same guy. I've long moved on from what happened and forgotten all about the inccident, then all of a sudden he contacted me on thanksgiving day wanting to be friends which I accepted without thinking. Though I'm over it and have gotten ride of the past feeling, I'm worried about those feelings coming back, especially when I know is not going to work out and I'm with someone already. I don't just want anything to do with him anymore, how can I tell him all this without sounding childish, selfish or crazy being that I already accepted his friendship.

[amicon]

Honesty is always the best policy.
Tell him you've had second thoughts and feel you have to carry on without his friendship.

[redhed35]

You could say, although you accepted his friendship,on consideration you feel it would be better if you were not friends, that you have a new relationship and you would feel uncomfortable with the friendship,wish him the best and sign off.

[Alty]

Tell him that you accepted his offer without thinking things through and now that you have you don't think it's a good idea.

Tell him that you're in a new relationship and want to focus on that right now, and not on him.

If you're worried about old feelings coming back then it's too soon for friendship. Not all exes can be friends, in fact, most exes can't be friends.

[Mistique]

Just as amicon said: be honest, straight forward and firm. Tell him exactly what you told us. "I have been thinking about our last conversation and I really thought about us being friends. I honestly don't think it is a good idea and I don't think that it would work. I am past a lot of stuff and found a great guy that makes me happy. I think it would be best for both of us to go our own separate ways. I wish you the best and take care!"

Be honest, friendly, gentle and firm BUT to the point. Good luck!

[espejuelo]

Thanks a lot guys, but do say it over the phone, email, text or in person?

[amicon]

How did he get in touch with you? I'd use the same type of communication.

[Devorameira]

Can we just be good friends?" There is an easy answer - No you can't, not in a million years so don't waste your time trying. Tell him honestly that you've moved on and have a new man in your life and don't want a relationship of any kind with him.

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The hardest part of loving someone is knowing when to let go, and knowing when to say goodbye. - Anonymous

[talaniman]

Being honest with him is the way to go, be it text, email, or phone, but busy, and unavailable, is also an option, plus simply ignoring him if you have to.