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matty2010 · Dec 5, 2009, 03:34 AM

Me and my girlfriend have been together for 6year.We never have sex because she doesn't won't it anymore.We only do it to satisfied me but that doesn't last that long course I no she doesn't enjoy it anymore and it just for me in a way!
I am at my wits end because we never kiss we never hug.Sound like it could be the end of aware relationship!But that's the last think I won't to do is split up over no sexually activity,I love the woman.
Just to say the sex was ace when we first meet then we had a child that is 2 now!!

mudweiser · Dec 5, 2009, 03:42 AM

Have you spoken to her about this? What does she say? What happens when you do talk about this?

Do you watch porn? If you watch a lot of porn it could be a huge turn off for her and well that's probably reason #1 she doesn't want to be touched by you.

Do you do things for her? Like make dinner? Let her have a girls night so she's baby free? Tell her she's beautiful?

You guys need to talk! Seems like you lack communication!

Synnen · Dec 5, 2009, 09:06 AM

Having a baby--and the extra work that goes with it--can ruin a libido.

Do you two ever have nights where you get out of the house WITHOUT the baby?

Gemini54 · Dec 5, 2009, 09:03 PM

For many women their sex drive decreases after the birth of a child. This may or may not have contributed to your GF's lack of libido.

The first thing I'd suggest is TALK. Not the 'how come I'm not getting any', sort of talk but the 'I care about our relationship and I miss the connection we used to have through sex', sort of talk.

If there is no physical affection it could be the symptom of a deeper problem, or it could just be that she thinks if she kisses and hugs you, you'll want sex.

Talk to her and make some time for kissing and hugging - without it leading to sex.

QLP · Dec 6, 2009, 04:42 PM

She could also be frightened of getting pregnant again, particualrly if the birth was difficult or she finds motherhood more demanding than she expected.

There are so many possiblilities to be honest, especially after the birth of a child. She may be simply too tired. She may no longer feel attractive.

Gemini is spot on. Talk to her in a non-accusing way. Make it clear you are there for her and want to help with anything that might be upsetting her - and make sure she doesn't feel it's just so you can have sex. Give plenty of affection without sex for now.

Good luck