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    Michelle12345's Avatar
    Michelle12345 Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Nov 23, 2009, 07:37 PM
    Baby mama drama Need advise ASAP!
    So I have been with my b/f for 3 yrs and he has spent every moment with me... BUT he is still legally married to his babies mother. He has been telling me he is going to get a divorce since we first met but that "he doesnt have the money". How long should I wait? He says he wants to get a lawyer and will cost at least 2,500. Does it really cost that much?
    J_9's Avatar
    J_9 Posts: 40,298, Reputation: 5646
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    #2

    Nov 23, 2009, 07:40 PM
    You have waited too long already!!

    Yes, it can cost that much... but it'll end up costing you more if you end up having his baby and he stays with his wife.

    Tell him to get lost and don't come back until he has the divorce papers signed.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #3

    Nov 23, 2009, 07:45 PM

    Divorces are expensive, but if he had really wanted one, he could have saved for it in 3 years.
    bjohnrupp's Avatar
    bjohnrupp Posts: 293, Reputation: 32
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    #4

    Nov 23, 2009, 07:52 PM

    Have to agree with Tal- he had 3 years to save for a divorce ($2,500 is not a lot to save in 3 yr period of time). You waited too long already. Tell him you're not waiting any longer.
    J_9's Avatar
    J_9 Posts: 40,298, Reputation: 5646
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    #5

    Nov 23, 2009, 08:26 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by zippit View Post
    you may want to re-post or read the law threads,there are alot of variables but a divorce can be really cheap if there are not many issues like children,property,ect.
    Read the title of the question... Baby mama drama Need advise ASAP. There IS a child involved.
    jmjoseph's Avatar
    jmjoseph Posts: 2,727, Reputation: 1244
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    #6

    Nov 23, 2009, 08:34 PM
    May I ask where he lives? With you, her, or by himself?

    3 years is a long time to be waiting on him to divorce.

    If this was important to him, he would have made it priority one.

    Do you feel as if you are being used?
    Michelle12345's Avatar
    Michelle12345 Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
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    #7

    Nov 30, 2009, 09:32 AM
    Me and him live together, and we had 2 kids together. I really don't feel like I am being used simply for that fact that he is ALWAYS home with me... never goes out with the boys... stays home with the kids. Any advice?
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #8

    Nov 30, 2009, 09:59 AM
    When there are kids involved then mommas and daddy's are involved. Leave his ex alone. Ignore her. You have your own worries. He needs a divorce because she has all the rights to him, legally.

    Maybe you should research this yourself, and examine your own results. Yellow pages, and google can help you. Find out if his concerns have merit or not.

    Frankly he may just be evading child support, or some other financial excuse. Bet they own a house together.
    liz28's Avatar
    liz28 Posts: 4,662, Reputation: 1034
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    #9

    Nov 30, 2009, 10:17 AM

    If you want him to get a divorce and he wants one too but can't afford by don't you help him pay for it. Btw, the tax season is around the corner so maybe he can use his taxes to pay for it if he works. Just a thought!

    However if he keep using money as an issue then he will never get it done. How much money have he been saving towards it in the last 3 years?

    I think he is just at ease about this situation. I mean he have a wife and a girlfriend.

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