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crazydogs · Nov 19, 2009, 05:16 PM

Hello. My 2 sons are 21 and 20. They do not pay rent, help out around the house. They stay up all night and sleep all day. I have asked them to pitch in several times. I get cussed out. All this in front of their 10 year old brother. The police say They can do whatever they want, including cause havoc all night. I live in Suffolk County, NY.

Any advise or real life experiences will be greatly appeciated. Thank you all. I want them out. I think their wings are very flappable to fly away on their own.

fishlover · Nov 19, 2009, 05:27 PM

They're over 18, they're adults. If they want to act and speak that way, they can find somewhere else to live. Kick 'em out.

jmjoseph · Nov 19, 2009, 05:32 PM

Stop doing things for them, like washing clothes, and giving them food.

At least until they start giving you respect and support.

Kids should ALWAYS respect their parents, no matter what age they are, or stage/phase of life they are in.

It's a shame when you have to call the cops on your own kids.

I feel for you.

justcurious55 · Nov 19, 2009, 05:32 PM

You'll have to give them notice and if they don't get out you'll have to file for an eviction. Prepare yourself, you'll probably get cussed out even more. But sometimes tough love is best. This seems like one of those times.

Jake2008 · Nov 19, 2009, 11:23 PM

Are they handicapped in any way? Are they low functioning individuals who cannot take care of themselves?

This didn't happen overnight, and you have to take some of the blame for them being deadbeats. Where is their father, and why are there no rules in your home?

I don't know what could possibly have gone wrong for them to be so disrespectful. Do you have any idea? Or is it a matter of they have lived their lives without anybody having any expectations of them? They stay up all night and sleep all day. I guess they don't go to school, or work either?

But let me guess. You pay for food, shelter, clothing. You do all their laundry, pick up after them too? You are doing no service to them by not allowing them to grow up.

I am stunned that you would have produced adults like this, and turn around and then expect somebody else to solve the problem, i.e. the police, in getting them evicted.

I think you need help and assistance in doing the right thing by your adult children, and I hope you get it.