[InPain1337]

Ok, I thought it was usually pretty strange to ever ask random people over the internet how to fix problems but this one is so stressful and painful that I haven't slept well for weeks and I'm constantly in a up or down feeling. First, Ill say I'm a high school student and that my best friend is a girl who I've known since 8th grade. We were always great friends and had been in a relationship 8th grade but of course that's not quite real. Now I'm almost out of high school and into college and I've started to notice I think everything she does is great and I'm always more than happy then before to see her. She feels the same but doesn't want a hardcore relationship that id like but don't need, but the problem is, I'm in love with her and every time I just want to be her man, although this isn't all that manly, I want to just spend time lying togeather cuddling not necessarily having sex. I just want her love, she said we both want the same thing and agreed with me but isn't sure about letting me pull the trigger on it. I said ill give her time but I've given her almost 3 months and my heart is slowly ripping and I feel like its impossible to breathe because I want her so badly but she doesn't understand how its hurting me, I've explained but nothing but has changed, in fact its even more awkward now because of that and I'm slowly losing her I'm sure. Too much pain for me I need help, no need to tell me to just wait it out until college because I get that, I'm talking how to deal now until then. Im in love with someone I don't even know loves me back, weather she is hiding it or doesn't want to tell me were just friends, either would be fine but I need closure. Please help. :confused:

[Scleros]

Please help.

The only help you'll likely get is that which you make for yourself. Cope with your feelings and continue your friendship, or not and discontinue it and hope with time the pain and thoughts of her fade. Been there, done that. As you're finding out it isn't a good place to be. Recommend you start dating as many other women as you can because I suspect you are firmly entrenched in the friend zone and going nowhere with her except to twist in the wind. She's either a friend or potential mate, decide which it has to be and act accordingly. Reasoning with her in hopes of convincing her to permit you to have a relationship with her ain't going to do it.

[I wish]

Since she already knows how you feel about her, the ball is on her side of the court. If she wanted to something to happen, she would let you know.

I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but if it's been 3 months of silence, then you can be pretty sure that she doesn't feel the same way about you and that she's just letting you down easy.

You need to stop talking to her until your feelings for her have disappated, otherwise, you're just going to keep on hurting.

If you don't want to loose this friendship, then let her know that you need space so that you can heal from your pains. If she can't understand that, then she's not a very good friend in the first place.

Your other choice is to keep on talking to her and waiting for her to come around. The problem with that is that you will over-analyze everything she does and says, as well as fall for the demon of false hope. All of which is very unhealthy.

You said it yourself, you can't sleep because you keep waiting for her. Well, STOP waiting and move on with your life. I know it's easy for us to tell you to move on, but you're in so much pain and you don't deserve to be in this position. Quit putting your life on hold for someone who might never come around to you. Go do things for yourself. Meet new people and have fun with your friends.