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dincher · Nov 3, 2009, 07:48 PM

I have another online friend, we are very close. (at least I thought) .

We chat with each other on the telephone, give each other packages, etc etc. She lives in another country but she's like a sister to me. We've been friends for four years now. Anyway, someone blocked me on Facebook for discussing religious beliefs and they took offense, and then they proceeded to block my girlfriend as well, because of my views even though she doesn't even hold the same views.

Point is, that my girlfriend started "crying" all over the place, posting her pity me story that she got blocked because of "my internet friend" (me). I don't blame her for "crying" - she was after all blocked for something she didn't do and she did like that person's page.

But, why does the term "internet friend" bug me? It's not like I don't spend money on this chick when her birthday and christmas come around, and vice versa.

Could I be disconnected from reality? Because that is after all what she is... we never met, but still I wonder why that term "internet friend" bothers me. Has anyone here felt the same way?

N0help4u · Nov 3, 2009, 09:02 PM

I think it is somewhat common that we often get caught up in a serious attachment to many of our internet friends. I don't think what you are going through is all that uncommon if we are honest about it.
With internet friends we can project a lot of our own image of what we precieve others to be like and so it seems harder on us when we lose them... often they had no flaws, faults, etc, in our mind.
I have heard several stories of people getting really strong attachments to internet friends. You are not alone.

dincher · Nov 3, 2009, 10:36 PM

Would the term "internet friend" bother you if you thought you were close to the person? I really did think we were close. Like I said, we used to talk every weekend for four years and then for hours on end. She is like a sister to me, but now I"m starting to doubt her.

The problem with being labeled an internet frined is that she placed a qualifier on "friend". All along, I was here sitting feeling like she was a "friend" and now I'm discovering that she sees me as an "internet friend."

I sense disparity, and feel uneasy about the qualifier "internet". Does that mean she doesn't see me as a "real friend"?

It bothers me because it comes during a rant of sorts - making it seem like a way to distance herself from me. As though, by adding that qualifier, she seemed to say: "and she's not even a REAL friend."

dontknownuthin · Nov 7, 2009, 12:39 PM

I think you are splitting hairs. Would you be as offended if someone called you their "friend from the neighborhood" or their, "work friend" or their "highschool friend"? She's simply qualifying where she knows you from. Perhaps what this is about is that generally you've not met her yet in person, and you don't know where you stand with this friend. I'd suggest you start working toward an opportunity to visit with one another and take your friendship off-line after all this time.

N0help4u · Nov 7, 2009, 01:00 PM

No I agree with Dontknow I think the distinction is merely having meet you personally or never having met you.
Just like in real life some people still call their friends 'some one I know' or 'someone I am associated with' or CLOSE friend. Internet friends make similar distinctions and internet simply means never met. So using the word internet is really basically irrelevant.
So yes you are splitting hairs.