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aladisic · Nov 5, 2009, 07:41 AM

Hello. I have a 7 year old daughter. Her biological dad and I dated only a few months before I got pregnant. We broke up way before the baby was born. He has only seen her once when she was 1 week old for a total of 5 minutes. I have never asked him for support, and he has never given her anything. Recently I had to get a paternity test for insurance purposes, and he did indeed come back as being the dad. We made a deal we discussed that whe the test came back that he was the dad, he would sign over parental rights and I would never ask him for support.. The day the results came back he did not show up. I had already told the support people I did not want support because of the deal we made. Now... here is my question. He is not on her birth certificate and she has my last name(maiden). I am remarried and She only knows my husband as her father. He wants to adopt her badly, and I would love fore this to happen. However, I don't know where her biological dad is, his ss number, his dob or anything. What do I need to do?

JudyKayTee · Nov 5, 2009, 07:55 AM

If you use the search feature you will find this has been asked/answered a thousand times.

The child cannot be adopted without the consent of the natural father. If you don't know where he is an Attorney can get a Court Order to serve him by publication.

He cannot simply waive his rights/privileges as a father and walk away. However, he CAN sign to allow the child to be adopted.

If you "recently" were in contact with him (you say he didn't show up) I don't know how you've lost contact with him so soon - ?

aladisic · Nov 5, 2009, 08:04 AM

I guess I was trying to find a way to do this without an attorney, they are expensive. Also, in answer to your question of how I lost touch with him... He was court ordered to show up for the test, but not for the results.

aladisic · Nov 5, 2009, 08:05 AM

Also if it matters his name is not on the birth certificate.

JudyKayTee · Nov 5, 2009, 08:11 AM

Originally Posted by aladisic

also if it matters his name is not on the birth certificate.

He doesn't need to be on the birth certificate - you had DNA testing. He's the father.

As far as losing touch with him - the Court contacted him somewhere. Ask them.

Synnen · Nov 5, 2009, 09:49 AM

I would not EVER recommend doing any form of adoption without a lawyer.

You have NO idea how easy it can be to fill out a form wrong--which leaves the door open for the adoption to be overturned.

Get a lawyer. They may be expensive, but when dealing with adoption, it's better to pay the money than to be VERY sorry later.