[TwistedContext0]

I've been with my girlfriend for a couple weeks now and were happy so far. This isn't our first time dating, we've been off and on for about 3 or 4 years now. And all the other times we've dated, things haven't really worked out between us. Since we've gotten back together, I don't know what I'd do with out her and I know I really do love and care about her. But at the same time, my exgirlfriend keeps popping up in my mind. We had a bad relationship and now have a no contact order between us. I care about her and I know I don't ever want to be with her again, but for some reason... every little thing seems to remind me of her lately. Sometimes bad thoughts, sometimes good and other times, its just memories. But I want to just forget about her. I love my current girlfriend and that's who I really want, but for some reason, I haven't completely erased the idea of my ex yet. So if anyone could please tell me why this is, or how to just get rid of her... I'd appreciate it:)

[ChihuahuaMomma]

Because you had a relationship with her, that includes good times, bad times, fights, fun, tear, laughs. Those things aren't easy to just forget. I've been broken up with my ex for three years now, and my 1 year anniversary with my current boyfriend is tomorrow. I'm incredibly happy with my relationship but I still think of ex. It's natural. Just don't act on it. It seems to be your pattern. Break up-get back together-break up-get back together. I hope things work out for you this time, however if they don't, don't go back to the ex.

[jaime90]

Try to direct all your thoughts about your ex, towards your current girlfriend. Every time a thought comes up about your ex, turn it around toward the girlfriend you have now.

[TwistedContext0]

I dated a girl for about 4 1/2 years on and off and this last time we dated lasted about 10 1/2 months and recently ended in September. Throughout the relationship I did a wide list of things that would make ANYONE in their right minds want to leave me. Such as cheating, lying, talking to people she this liked, putting my hands on her when I was drunk and fighting with her over stupid reasons. But towards the end, we were pretty close to perfect. We barely fought, and everything seemed great. But then I left for school 2 states away and less then a week of me being there, she dumped me and found a boyfriend (I'm a female by the way) and it caught me completely off guard. I pleaded for her not to do it, but when that didn't work I decided that it was my fault for her leaving and now I'm back home because school didn't work out and it's only been a month. I miss her so much it hurts and I can't stop thinking about her. I want her back but I don't, and I know I'm in love with her and can do it right this time but it doesn't seem like an option for her. I'm hurting pretty bad over this whole thing. I have slept with 2 people after we broke up hoping it would ease the pain but it only makes me feel more quilty. What should I do??

[lemonism]

Hey I'm no expert but if you really feel like you can't let her go then don't. Maybe just wait until she breaks up with her boyfriend and then try and get closer with her again. If you do get back together with her then definitely don't do any of the stuff you were doing in the relationship that angered her and don leave her again. If she does happen to break up with her boyfriend let her know how you feel and tell her that you really want to go into a serious relationship now.
Hope that helps and hope everything works out
By the way ill bet half the reason she went out with a guy was to try and ease her own pain a bit and if you tell her that you won't hurt her again maybe it'll help for her to come back to u


Editors note to poster

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relati...lk-303157.html

You have no contact info, so please along with staying within the rules, could you please use spell check so we can all understand you-Thanks in advance.

[Devorameira]

You really need to face the facts - she broke it off, so now you need to face the reality of the situation and move on.

It's obvious that she wasn't happy in the relationship. It could be that she was never able to get over the past abuse in your relationship, or could be that she really wanted to just have a new start with a fellow, or could be that she just plain didn't feel the love for you that you suddenly seem to have for her.

I'm sure you are feeling bad, like you can't live without her, but believe me, you can. Everybody feels awful after a breakup.

[talaniman]

What's done is done, and you no longer need to suffer the guilt of past mistakes, and failures. Just leave her alone, and let this go, and look ahead to a better future by learning from the past, and doing better in the future, and above all be PATIENT with yourself, as your healing will take a lot of time.