[basquiat]

I know what the scriptures say about becoming involved with a non-believer, however when you have the potential to become romantically involved with someone who has committed their life to God, but is in a season in their life where they are no longer 100% practicing, but still have their faith in God and integrity. My question is: Is it permissible to pursue a relationship with someone who at one point in their life has given their life the same God you follow, and still professes to be a born again christian, but just not as full-on as you may be?
This is hard to explain, I hope this question has made sense.
I'd appreciate any veiws on this, as I'm really focused on doing the right thing and pleasing God, But I am not so much of a Fundamentalist as I once was, I feel I have learnt a lot and life is not clear cut, black and white as most fundamentalists tend to veiw it.:eek:

[basquiat]

To add to my last post:
The only scripture I am fimiliar with, regards to being unequally yoked is; 2 Corinthians 6:14... "Do not be yoked together with unbelievers........what fellowship can light have with darkness...."

This scripture is dealing specifically with an unbeliever being yoked with a believer. In this context it doesn't even mention marriage or the prospect of marriage. My situation is two believers at very different stages in their personal journey with God/Faith. I have heard it preached many times that if you're considering a long term relationship, you must be equally yoked? Is this just a denominational philosophy? Or is this something I must settle with God myself? As we are both essentually believers. Help

[Maggie 3]

When you are born again you put your old life to death and live for Jesus.
When you live for the Lord you live the kind of life that honores and pleases
Him in every way. You stop doing things that are against Gods will, that separate
from Him. Jesus loves you and though His death in the body so that he might
bring you into God's presence as a person who is holy, with no wrong, and with
nothing of which God can judge you guilty. Jesus is the light and there is no darkness
in Him. There is no such person as non-practicing Born Again Christian. You are
for the Lord or against. If you love Jesus build your life on faith in Him. Sin is
darkness and death, run from it don't look back. It is sin that keeps us spiritually
dead but God forgives and gives us life when we follow Him. He strips away
the spiritual rulers and powers of darkness over you. Be transformed by the renewing
of your mind in God's spirit. Faith in His word is not letting feelings pull you back to a carnal minded life style.

Maggie 3

[arcura]

basquiat,
That depends on what you think the words like born again and fundamentalist mean.
As an example I am a born again Christian and a fundamentalist in that I was born again of the spirit and water in baptism and I believe in the 5 fundmentals of the Christian faith but I do not believe in Sola Scriptora or Sols Fide (that is Scripture only and faith only) for they are both beliefs that are not biblical and therefore heresies.
Your association with this other person sounds to me to be a bit judgmental for he/she is not conforming to what you think is "the way".
I may be wrong on that, but that's the way it seems to me to me.
Keep in mind that a persons faith can only be judged by God and that God understands each one of us far better than we understand ourselves.
When I am involved with others I pray now and in the future that I will do, say, and think the right things about the person and my involvement with them.
That includes all those people whom I know, whom I love, whom I work with on the internet and with strangers.
I try to be a good Christian in all of those encounters and not worry too much about those individual's beliefs unless they are dangerously radical in some way.
I think that is why I get along well with almost everyone.
Christianity is a religion of attraction and it is NOT supposed to be one of force or intimidation.
That is why we are told by Jesus to be the light of the world (that is a good example) and to let our light shine for all to see and give the glory to God.
So let us all live for bringing that Glory to God by the manner in which we associate with others.
Peace and kindness,
Fred

[basquiat]

Hi Fred,
Thank you for your answer. It is a breath of fresh air, as I have met with so much dogma and unfriendly advice since I started seeking councel on this.
I realise I may have come across a bit judgemental, but it is difficult to describe this situation as it is a very grey area for most Christians, as most people tell me I should be in church and so should my friend before we can be considered born again christians, therefore equally yoked and apparently then it would be permissible for us to pursue a serious relationship.
My faith, and my friends faith is deeply personal to each of us, however we want to do what is right in the eyes of God/Scripturally.

[Maggie 3]

We choose daily who we will serve. Jesus has no interest in dipassionate, hypothetical views regarding His person and work. He want to know what you think about Him. Who
Do you say that He is? He wants us to know Him in a close, intimate, relationship.
You receive this through prayer, and reading His Word the bible, believeing in faith
The truth of His Word. Jesus works on our heart and will bring wisdom, knowledge and
Understsnding of Him, to us as we seek Him. Through forginvness and the power of the Holy Spirit, we can restore our relationship with the Lord. The Lord tells us to pray in the name of Jesus . When we ask in the name of Jesue we are saying to the Father, "Jesus
would have asked this if He were physically here now." When you have a personal
Relationship with Jesus we depend and rely on the guidance of God's Word. If you do
This you will know how to handle things as they come up in life. Seek and ask God!

Blessings, Maggie 3

[arcura]

basquiat,
Maggie 3 has made some good points.
Also, IF you have been baptized with water and spirit (that is in the name of the Father, The Son and The Holy Spirit) you are born again.
Also keep in mind that whatever relationship you have with any one it should be first and foremost with Jesus Christ as your Lord and savior.

[galveston]

What do you mean by "long term relationship"?

The Bible gives us the only righteous definition of that with the word "marriage", and it is a lifetime commitment.

I ask because so many claim a long term relationship when they really mean until someone more attractive comes along.

[arcura]

galveston,
That is a good question.
I'd like to see the answer.
Peace and kindness,
Fred

[rnrg]

Basquiat,
A lot of times, it is difficult for us to make difficult decisions because our emotions are involved. What would you tell another Christian that asked the same question as you have? God does want us to be "equally yoked," not just for His sake, but for our sake as well. Can you guess why? It definitely saves a lot of heart ache, grief, pain, dissappointment, disallusionment, and unfillment in our life. God expects those that we date and eventually choose as our marriage partners to have Him (God) first in their lives. If you could present a "non-practicing" Christian before God, your Heavenly Father, as your prospective marriage partner, what do you think God would say?

God is very serious about our relationship with Him. He is well aware of our fickle nature, but expects us to "grow-up" and leave no one in doubt about our salvation. He expects the same from those we date/marry. Please know that all Christians have gone through periods of growing, learning, being tested, failure, rebelling, and being reconciled with God. This usually happens, though, during our early years as God is teaching us to rely on Him. From that we grow and mature. Our rebelling ceases (or mostly), and we gain wisdom and understanding. We become "like a tree" planted by the "Water." However, a dormant life, produces a withered tree.

If someone is living a "dormant" or "stagnant" Christian life, then you definitely need to find out why (as a Christian brother/sister) and try to encourage them to reconconcile with God, or whatever the problem may be, in order that they may start "growing again." Here are some things to hold to in choosing your mate.

1. Pray about your future husband/wife and that God will lead you to this person.
2. Does the person love God and is God their main focus. Do they spend time with Him daily? Reading His Word?
3. Is God evident in his/her life? Are they becoming more Christlike?
4. Do you both share the same/similar Christians beliefs, core values, morals. This plays an important role in every marriage.
5. Lastly, unresolved issues during a relationship will be carried into your lifelong relationship (marriage). Without God being a top priority in both of your lives, your marriage will be very difficult and most likely fail.

I know you said earlier that you have learned a lot but things were not so clear cut. You can depend upon this. God is very much aware of you and what is best for you. He will not lead you into a wrong relationship if you are truly seeking His will for your life. Lastly, seek God and wait patiently for His answer. Accept the answer that He gives. His ways are always right. His ways will save a lifetime of misery that IS waiting at your door.

[arcura]

rnrg,
That is a very good advice post.
I hope it helps.
Peace and kindness,
Fred