[veryupset]

My girlfriend and I were in a really good relationship.. we had great times together and she would always tell me how comfortable she felt with me... she also says that it is really easy to hang out and be with me... in a past relationship of hers, she was physically and mentally abused... and I told her a story about my past girlfriend who would attack me and try to commit suicide... I told her about not letting her leave the house for fear that she would kill herself... my now girlfriend freaked out and has not spoken to me in a week, she says that she needs time and that she doesn't know if she can stay with me because of my actions with my ex girlfriend. I have never indicated in any way that I would ever be like that around her... what can I do to show her that I would never hurt her emotionally or physically when she won't even give me the chance. And was I too honest with her?

Now she also says that we need to slow down our relationship... to do this.. she broke up with me and doesn't want to talk about it. I told her that I was upset and that it feels like she putting on the breaks and not even letting me get close to her.. she says she needs time... and that she doesn't know if we can be anything more than friends..

[jaime90]

You weren't too honest with her. If you didn't tell her now were you planning on waiting until you got married? She got some new information about your past relationship and changed her mind about your relationship with one another. The best thing you can do now is to do what she is suggesting- give her some time. If you pressure her or try to push and control the situation, trying to talk her into getting back together with you- you will be confirming her fears- that she will be controlled like your past girlfriend- not saying you were controlling, it's just how she sees it I'm sure. If you step back and give her time to cool off, you will prove to her that you are able to give her freedom and independence. Who knows, she may come back and you'll be pleasently surprised.

[talaniman]

I would be upset too, to tell the truth, but I would still leave her alone and get someone who can handle what I had been through without freaking out over nothing. She has issues I guess.