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    Spontaneouslemon's Avatar
    Spontaneouslemon Posts: 75, Reputation: 5
    Junior Member
     
    #1

    Oct 18, 2009, 03:41 PM
    Did I sound completely desperate?
    So this guy told me he really likes me. And asked me out (via text message, I told him I had seen a trailer for a film and he told me he'd bring me to go see it) this was about 2 days ago. I asked him when he wanted to go, and he said maybe Monday, or Tuesday... we'll figure it out. Then he asked me if the movie (Paranormal Activites) is playing anywhere near, so I told him I'd check. Then I stepped into a movie theater and saw another movie with my mom, so I couldn't check right away. Once I got home, about 2 hours later, I responded by telling him where the movie was playing and asked if 8p or 10p would work for him on Monday? And he never responded!
    I hope I didn't sound desperate by giving him a location and time? This was about 2 days in advance so maybe it sounded desperate but I just have a really busy week so my natural impulse was to attempt to save a time to go to the movies.
    Then after a day passed, an old friend of mine decided she'd come by on Monday night and asked if I wanted to hang out and I told her sure! Since I hadn't seen her in a while and the guy hadn't responded yet! (I've known him for about a year now).
    So I sent him a text telling him: "Scratch the monday showtimes I had to make plans hope it's okay? I didn't know if you could do monday or not. We'll figure something out for next week." And he still never responded.

    So what's your reaction to this? Did I scare him off or what?

    Thanks in advance!
    dream11207's Avatar
    dream11207 Posts: 39, Reputation: 3
    Junior Member
     
    #2

    Oct 18, 2009, 03:58 PM

    Everything you did was fine. You acted like yourself and yourself was not over bearing or needy or pushy or anything like that. You are seeing now (right away) if he would be a reliable person to date and the answer is obviously no. Not responding for days after someone asks you a question like that has no reason or exscuse.

    Don't contact him again. And if/when he contacts you, I'd think beforehand if you want to even reciprocate. He does not sound very promising.
    Spontaneouslemon's Avatar
    Spontaneouslemon Posts: 75, Reputation: 5
    Junior Member
     
    #3

    Oct 18, 2009, 09:40 PM
    Do I sound completely desperate?
    So this guy told me he really likes me. And asked me out (via text message, I told him I had seen a trailer for a film and he told me he'd bring me to go see it) this was about 2 days ago. I asked him when he wanted to go, and he said maybe Monday, or Tuesday... we'll figure it out. Then he asked me if the movie (Paranormal Activites) is playing anywhere near, so I told him I'd check. Then I stepped into a movie theater and saw another movie with my mom, so I couldn't check right away. Once I got home, about 2 hours later, I responded by telling him where the movie was playing and asked if 8p or 10p would work for him on Monday? And he never responded!
    I hope I didn't sound desperate by giving him a location and time? This was about 2 days in advance so maybe it sounded desperate but I just have a really busy week so my natural impulse was to attempt to save a time to go to the movies.
    Then after a day passed, an old friend of mine decided she'd come by on Monday night and asked if I wanted to hang out and I told her sure! Since I hadn't seen her in a while and the guy hadn't responded yet! (I've known him for about a year now).
    So I sent him a text telling him: "Scratch the monday showtimes I had to make plans hope it's okay? I didn't know if you could do monday or not. We'll figure something out for next week." And he still never responded.

    So what's your reaction to this? Did I scare him off or what?

    Thanks in advance!
    friend4u178's Avatar
    friend4u178 Posts: 3,349, Reputation: 1584
    Ultra Member
     
    #4

    Oct 18, 2009, 10:43 PM

    I don't think so , you were only communicating. Just be patient and see where it goes , no point fretting over something that may not even be a problem.

    Good Luck whatever happens :)
    crimsonwhispyr's Avatar
    crimsonwhispyr Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #5

    Oct 18, 2009, 11:42 PM

    Maybe something happened to his phone, or he's busy, or not interested anymore (in that case a jerk)

    You didn't do anything wrong. Just trying to settle plans.
    Starry nights's Avatar
    Starry nights Posts: 213, Reputation: 104
    Full Member
     
    #6

    Oct 19, 2009, 12:49 AM
    Did I scare him off or what?


    Boy,its so easy giving advice and getting a perspective on other people's problems.Does another thing too,helps get perspective on one's own problems:)

    I am in the same spot as you and I have also posted my own concern a couple of days back to my friends here(who always help!).Like you I have started wondering on the guy's interest level/intentions/etc etc.

    That's natural,considering the circumstances where you are looking forward to something,then there's silence on the other end.Its pretty unnerving.

    So,my advice,ironically,is based on the advice I got here and which has brought back some sanity to me.Dont think twice about the texts.Dont put too much thought into the why's and wherefores.People react the way they want to,the way they have been brought up to,the way they know how to.Maybe he's lazy.Maybe he's got work.Maybe he just doesn't want to go to the movies.Maybe this.Maybe that.I don't get paid an extra dime by anyone trying to figure out what other people are thinking.So,I just don't do it.

    What will work is for the guy to come up to me and state his intentions clearly(after he knows what they are himself,to save us all any trouble:p),show ME he cares and wants to work on something between us.That or nothing else,in terms of a solid,proper relationship.If he fits into that category,I will think.Else,he can be somebody I just met and might forget!

    Read our friends's advice to my latest post(Not again?)to derive a solution to your question.

    And no,you didn't scare him off.If making plans to go the movies(which is as natural as saying hi,what's up) means scaring someone off,then you are better off without such a unique specimen of a guy in your life.

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