[juve8]

Hello,

Me and my girlfriend of 1.5 years broke up. Life lost their appeal and edge, it all seems meaningless now.

To give some background:

We met about two years ago and clicked right away, we came from the same countries, similar childhoods and were almost the same person just different gender. Everything was going great; we went to some vacations together, started to get to know each other and I really started to fall in love and realized that she is truly one of a kind and maybe the one for me. I know that probably everyone says this about their mates, but I really do mean this; she was a different girl, unlike I ever met before. She was literally everything I wanted and more in one package, I could not think of one thing that I would like and she did not posses.

Everything was going great, I was happier then I ever was, and felt like for once I had a person that I can share everything with. Then we realized that I am falling in love with her, but she does not feel the same. She said that it takes her longer to feel that way which was fine. Recently she realized that she does not love me and probably will not in the future. Its one of those unexplained things, we had an amazing relationship and she said she hope and waited for the feeling to come, but it never did.

We talked about this, and decided that since we are both having a great time and do not wish to get married or look for something else, we would stay together. She told me up front that she does not love me and that after all this time it probably will not happen. Of course this devastated me but I said that she means a lot to me, that I am having fun and am willing to stay together and see what happens. It was going good, except a small fight here and there, in which it always came back to the fact that she does not feel the same as I do, and sometimes I, and rightfully so ask for more then she can give me, but she just can’t. I knew this the whole time, and knew that there is probably no real future, but I loved her very much, I was truly happy and was willing to forget about our issues, deny the reality and just worry about this later. I was truly vowed by her and maybe somewhere inside hoped she will fall in love with me. We were completely honest with each other and always told the absolute truth, even what it was not pleasant.

Now we had another of those arguments, and we realized that we are just lying to ourselves and delaying the unavoidable. We both respect and admire each other, but its time to move on and not stay in a place that is not healthy for either of us. Now to be honest, I still wanted to stay together. I knew it’s pointless and that it will end eventually but I had such strong feelings for her, loved her being around and just us spending time together that I was willing to deny it further and stay together. She did not feel the same and said that it issue will always come up, and we should just face it now and move on.

I am not mad at her and still love her and admire her, I know that what happened was for the benefit of us both and that now we can move on and try to find the right person, but I am still in pain. First because she was amazing and a huge part of my life, I live away from most of my family, and she and her family reminded me the feeling of a loving close circle. Second, I truly feel like she was the one for me, if things were different and we stayed together for another 5 or so years I would have married her and considered myself lucky to have someone like her. I am mad because life is cruel, I am furious because life dangled in front of me the realization of my dreams, not allowing me true happiness. I am sick to my stomach thinking that I found my other half, and then some mysterious force prevented her from loving me. I am lost and don’t know what to do and where to continue. As Cliché as it sounds, I really don’t think ill find someone better. Everything was great, except that someone or something decided to play a nasty joke on me. I just don’t understand what went wrong, I was the perfect boyfriend, we had the perfect recipe for love, and we had true potential for something special. I feel cheated and abused by life and by the other forces that may or may not be at work. I really feel that if this did not work out, then nothing will. It’s like I am cursed, and I am at a real lose. I doubt all that I knew and all that I believed in, I am mentally drained.

Sorry for the long post and the rant, I just need to pour my heart somewhere.

[redhed35]

You spent a lot of time in your post saying how great she was and that she was your other half, and how perfect everything was,except for one [B]major thing,she did not love you back.

It was not so wonderful and perfect for her,because she did not feel the thing you felt,nor thought about a future with you.

This was a big love for you,and a good friendship for her...

Unrequited love is perhaps the hardest I feel to comprehend, because one person sees how good it could be if only the other saw and felt it too.

The good news is, there is someone out there who will love you the way you deserve to be loved.

She told you the truth,she was honest and straight up with you,and I have to say I respect her decision to leave the relationship and give both of you a chance of finding love.

[juve8]

Your right, it is hard when you feel one thing and the other person does not, especially when it can be great. I do respect her for always being up front and open and forever will. I am not mad at her, I'm just upset that its over and I now lost the best thing I had.

Life can be so unfair...

[redhed35]

I think perhaps love can be so unfair.

But the up shot of this is you know what love is, and how to love..

It's the old cliché,better to have loved and lost then never loved at all... dos'ent reallyy help though.

All the platitudes don't ease the hurt.

All you can do is accept that the decision to end was the right one for both of you,and in time you will heal,and find someone just as special.

That sounds crazy talk right now,I know,but the hurt will ease,and you will heal.

Keep busy, exercise,eat healthy and look after yourself right now.

[talaniman]

It sucks for sure, but damn if you didn't try your best. The deck was stacked against you this time.

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