[tay19]

Okay, this is embarrassing enough, so please refreain yourself from juvenille comments.

Hello, my name is tayson, 21 years of age. And I'm gay.

Well, the tittle is preatty self explanatory, but to argument further... I've never been able to orgams () while I'm with someone.

I've had various boyfriend, and one or two one nightstanders. But I've never been able to reach ummm climax. I enjoy the whole experience, I mean right now I'm with a guy that really has come close to get me there but it seams I'm always one cm short from reaching


(I you feel uncomfortable reading this, you can walk away. But if you an advice please do let me know)

I mean I don't understand it. The guys I've been with, I've made them reach climax, why can't I?

The only reason I could think is that I jacked off a little too many times while growing up and busted my penis. (a little humor to break the ice :P but the statement remains true)

And don't throw me the story "well, maybe you're not gay" I hear that enough from family already. Besides, when I was a kid I did tried with girls and no luck either. I even felt uncomfortable doing it with a girl.


In any case. Thank you for your time. Mates, and thanks to those who would put their two cents in :D

[redhed35]

Reaching climax is a much a mental release as a physical..

The final letting go,so to speak..

Even though you are comfortable with your partner and they can reach climax,could it be possible that you are more into their pleasure then your own...

Trusting your partner and feeling safe to climax,perhaps is blocking your finale?

[shazamataz]

I cannot orgasm unless I am completely comfortable with my partner as redhed said...

I have to be in the right frame of mind as well... sometimes if I am 'oh so close' but not quite there I think of some saucy scenarios in my head to get me over the edge... I know the act should be enough but a little fantasy can go a long way just to get you over that hurdle of the first orgasm.

[Catsmine]

Is your partner as much into pleasing you as you are into pleasing him? Maybe you guys should just make love instead of having sex. There is a difference.

[Cat1864]

It almost sounds like a control issue. Like maybe you are holding part of yourself back from being completely involved in the union. It might be a fear of being vulnerable either physically or emotionally. Perhaps, subconsciously, your family's opinions of your lifestyle are affecting your mental and emotional involvement. Maybe you haven't found the one person who is right for you or you haven't given your partners enough time to be completely comfortable with them.

Another thought is that you may have conditioned yourself to reach orgasm from different stimuli than you are getting from sex.

Can you climax if you masturbate in front of your partner?

Believe it or not, a lot people (male and female, gay and straight) have problems letting go enough to climax. Yes, for the reasons I mentioned.

[Gemini54]

I doubt that your penis is 'broken' - I'm assuming that you reach orgasm OK when you're on your own?

It may be that you've got too used to the feeling of your own hand, and when you're with other guys it's just not the same. Perhaps you need to walk your partners through what feels good for you until it happens.

Perhaps sex with someone else just doesn't provide you with the level of stimulation that you require and you need to think about what would send you 'over the edge' when you get close. What extra little thing would tip you into orgasm?

It may be thinking about a favorite fantasy, watching some porn while you're doing it, stimulating yourself with a vibrator, or having your partner say or do specific things.

Sometimes it requires being totally 'in the moment' and not judging or having expectations of the experience before we can let go enough to climax. This takes practice!