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crhammer · Oct 13, 2009, 09:34 AM

I met this girl back in feb and got her number but never called her. About a month later she picks me up in a club and we start dating. For the first couple of months we would see each other once or twice a week but by the end of may we were spending just about every night together. We got in a big fight in the beginning of sept. and did not speak for a week. We starting hanging out again and everything seemed fine.

Then she goes to this wedding without me as she was the bridesmaid and I didn't know anyone and I really did not want to go. So instead her friend who she says she thinks is gay goes as her date because he was invited as he is a friend of the bride. She shares a hotel room with him and he comes and spends the weekend at her house during which time she ignores my calls. At first she lies and said she was alone all weekend and tells me that he was there with her but nothing happened. I don't believe that as I have caught being dishonest before. We hung out a few times after that but something seems different. She seems distant and never has time for me. I know she is not hanging out with the other guy through the week at least because he lives and works 2 hours away. When I questioned her about her lack of wanting to see me she said she is just busy with work and hasent had the time... however she has always been busy and was always able to make the time to see me. Over the last week she won't call first but will generally respond to my texts and calls. I think she has feelings for this other guy but wants to keep me on the sidelines to see how it works out? As of yesterday I have stopped contacting her and have decided not to respond to her for a week or so if she contacts me. Does anyone have any thoughts or advice?

redhed35 · Oct 13, 2009, 09:55 AM

It seems a lot of game playing and not much talking going on.

Have you considered just asking her if she wants out?

crhammer · Oct 13, 2009, 10:17 AM

Originally Posted by redhed35

it seems a lot of game playing and not much talking going on.

have you considered just asking her if she wants out?

I have asked her if she thinks its over between us on a couple of occasions. The first via text and she replied "what?" The second in person and said she didn't think so. The games are driving me crazy so I think I should just walk away. I remember her telling me long ago that she is loyal and doesn't break up but always gets broken up with

I wish · Oct 13, 2009, 10:21 AM

Originally Posted by crhammer

I remember her telling me long ago that she is loyal and doesnt break up but always gets broken up with

If she lied to you about other things, how do you know she isn't lying about that too?

There are too many mind games going on in this relationship. Is she can't take this relationship as seriously as you want it to be, then find someone else who shares your idea of what a relationship should constitute.

No point forcing her into something that she isn't willing to do.

amicon · Oct 13, 2009, 10:25 AM

She doesn't seem willing to communicate with you so its time to walk away as you suggested yourself.

crhammer · Oct 13, 2009, 10:25 AM

I agree. While it is hard and I still like her I believe for my own sanity I should move on. In a few weeks none of this will matter anyway

crhammer · Oct 13, 2009, 10:28 AM

Should I even bother contacting her to tell her I'm done forget about it. The problem is we have many of the same friends and hang out at many of the same places even before we got together. We've casually know each other for a couple years but were never really friends.

amicon · Oct 13, 2009, 10:30 AM

Yes listen to your head-it ll hurt for some time but you ll get over it.

redhed35 · Oct 13, 2009, 11:05 AM

Originally Posted by crhammer

Should I even bother contacting her to tell her I'm done forget about it. The problem is we have many of the same friends and hang out at many of the same places even before we got together. We've casually know each other for a couple years but were never really friends.

Even though you are finished,I would suggest you officially break up...

crhammer · Oct 13, 2009, 11:27 AM

She texted hour ago saying to hope you are having a great day and when I did not reply she just called me and did not answer. Am I doing the right thing?

redhed35 · Oct 13, 2009, 11:33 AM

Originally Posted by crhammer

She texted hour ago saying to hope u r having a great day and when i did not reply she just called me and did not answer. Am I doing the right thing?

You seem a little confused,or I am.

I under the impression you wanted to end the relationship.

If you want out, end it.

If you want to see what happens,talk to her.