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loopyhaze · Oct 5, 2009, 06:16 AM

Hello everyone,

Hope you are all well. Ive found myself slowly getting attracted to a co-worker over the last six months. I have tried very hard to be objective to see if the signals she's sent out to me are genuine or am I just mis-interprting them because I like her. After picking up quite a few signals. Glances and smiles I plucked up the courage to ask her out for a coffee during lunch.

Her response was 'she didn't think her boyfriend would approve, but thanks for the offer'

To be entirely ohnest I was supprised by the respose considering all the flirting that was going on so I simply lft it with a 'Your welcome'. Moving forward a few weeks, Ive noticed she's started flirting lightly and looking in my direction again.

Ive not contacted her again, being rejected once was quite enough. Can anyone offer some advice please, should I continue to be indefferent or should I ask her again. The only reason I say this is because Im not 100% sure she has a boyfriend.

Thanks in advance.

redhed35 · Oct 5, 2009, 06:25 AM

You can only go on what she says,if she has a boyfriend she is off limits,I suspect she likes the thought of you fancying her and its an ego boost to her...

Leave this one alone.

I wish · Oct 5, 2009, 07:30 AM

If she has a boyfriend and you have feelings for her, then stay away. You're just setting yourself up for heartache and disappointment.

Don't misinterpret her kindness for something more. If you think there's something more in her behavior, then she's emotionally cheating on her boyfriend. Any way you look at it, she's off limits.

ItWasMe · Oct 7, 2009, 02:35 PM

Keep away, first to your question yes she probably was, secondly feel happy that you are not her boyfriend ;)

jaime90 · Oct 7, 2009, 03:32 PM

She probably does have a boyfriend so I would stop flirting with her. I don't see any problem in giving her compliments though. She probably goes to her boyfriend and tells him that some guy at work thinks she looks good and he probably says, "well of course!" I know, a co-worker texted me 'you're lookin' good!' while I was with my fiancé and his response was, "You do!" When guys other than my fiancé give me compliments or flirt with me, (and it happens a lot) it makes me feel good about myself- and it makes me feel like more of a treasure to my fiance- that he has me, and they don't... Lucky him!

loopyhaze · Oct 19, 2009, 05:42 AM

Hi,

Thanks for the common sense advice. I would never intentional get involved with someone who is already spoken for. I've gone about my business and sort of ignored her. Not in a nasty way but am being as professional as I can be. She has tried again to get my attention but I'm not going to fall for it :-) - I bumped into her last week and saw she was a bit peeved at me, probably because I'm not chasing!

I wish · Oct 19, 2009, 11:31 AM

Sounds like she's emotionally unstable and her relationship is very fragile.

Good move by staying away. You don't need that type of drama in your life.

thagirlie · Oct 23, 2009, 07:44 AM

Well,some girls like to flirt and feel desired even if they are in a relationship ( men like to do, either, of course)
So,if she said that she has a boyfriend then you should ignore when she flirts with you,because probably she is just having fun

talaniman · Oct 24, 2009, 10:21 AM

Just because she flirts with you at work doesn't mean she wants you in any way, so forget trying to date her.