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Mykidsmatter · Sep 28, 2009, 01:10 PM

I am a mother of two children I have joint custody with their dad who lives in a different state. However, he just got remarried and wants me out of the picture all together. We have a court order for joint custody in the state in which I live in. I pay him child support every month, however he avoids all contact with me and doesn't allow the kids and I to speak. He states he is going to file abandoment on me? How could he do such a thing! He has changed his phone 6 times in the past few months.

J_9 · Sep 28, 2009, 01:16 PM

It appears you need to go back to court if you have joint custody but he's not giving you the joint time.

Mykidsmatter · Sep 28, 2009, 01:21 PM

I have contacted an attorney in the state in which he lives, however, right now I am getting all my money and ducks in a row to proceed in court. However, in the meantime he is constantly harassing me leaving nasty messages. I have sent the cops to his house numerous of times to do a wellness check on my children. However, I have never missed a payment yet. I am just wondering why he wants to make our kids suffer?

stevetcg · Sep 28, 2009, 01:40 PM

Because some people are just nasty like that. Maybe his wife doesn't like the fact that the ex is still part of his life. Wouldn't be a new story around here.

J_9 is right though... if he isn't playing along with the joint parenting plan, get the court to slap him for it.

Mykidsmatter · Sep 29, 2009, 02:28 PM

Yea, since she has come into the picture! It has been a total living HELL! But as long as I am sending child support every month and constantly trying to call my children, he has no rights in Florida to file abandonment on me does he? Like I have said they constantly cut their phone off and never except my mail.

stinawords · Sep 29, 2009, 04:13 PM

No, he can absolutely not file abandonment charges on you. So don't worry about that at all. But, as said you really need to get back into court to enforce your joint custody and the sooner the better (I know money is always an issue but the longer it takes the harder it can be).

ScottGem · Sep 29, 2009, 04:51 PM

First, if you read the Sticky Note on the top of this forum on abandonment , you would know abandonment is something you can't file on.

Second, you mention you have joint custody, what you don't say is if there is a court ordered visitation schedule in place. That's a key issue. Is there one? If there is, what were its terms?

If there was a visitation schedule, how did he get away with moving out of state?

Mykidsmatter · Sep 30, 2009, 08:27 AM

We had moved from Florida together and then he left and I filed abandonment on him in the State of Tn. They found him in Florida, however he came up here on a court order and we both were awarded joint custody. I got very sick and we agreed that the kids should go with him for awhile. So we used to meet at the Florida Alabama Stateline and switch the kids off every other weekend. However, since he has gotten married, he has stopped all visitation upon himself. The only court order in place is the one which is in Tn, states I pay child support once a month and Im entitled to sufficient phone calls, and all records and notifications as on my kids well being and so forth. However, he is not abiding by it.