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palmel1234 · Sep 25, 2009, 06:19 AM

I want a divorce. He's run up $10k in credit card debt, he never spends any time with me or the kids, and he expects me to have sex with him whenever he wants it (which I refuse to do). We've been to marriage counseling four times, each time things are better for a while, but then he reverts back to his selfish ways.

We have two children and a house in both of our names. I would like to keep the house since it's close to my children's school and daycare, but my husband refuses to move out. I told him fine, let’s sell the house, split any profit 50-50 and go our separate ways. He refused, he says if I want out of the marriage I have to leave.

I talked to an attorney and she told me I don't have grounds for abuse so if I want to keep the house I have to move out with the kids until she can file a temporary hearing. Then, maybe the judge will allow me to move back in and my husband would have to move out.

I don’t have any family here, a few friends, but no one has any room for me plus two kids. I don’t belong to any church so no help there either.

I know I should’ve asked the attorney this, but I was so upset I didn’t think to ask. My question is why do I have to move out to file the temporary hearing? We're talking one to two months. Why can’t I just stay in the house until the judge decides what happens?

Thanks for your time.

JudyKayTee · Sep 25, 2009, 06:46 AM

If your paid Attorney has told you that you HAVE to move out and then have a hearing she is basing that advice on something in the law - it may very well be that her argument will be that it is unsafe for you to be living with him. Therefore, you moved out to stay safe and now you want to get back in.

Your Attorney is familiar with ALL of the circumstances as well as the law in your area and I would believe her. The "why" part matters little except I'm sure you would like to understand why things are done in this manner.

palmel1234 · Sep 25, 2009, 07:29 AM

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palmel1234 · Sep 25, 2009, 07:33 AM

Thanks for your response. Yes, I'm sure there's a reason for it. It would just be helpful to understand why so when I'm asking someone to let me and my kids stay with them I can explain to them.

I also don't understand how the court would know I moved out unless I started getting mail at the new residence.

JudyKayTee · Sep 25, 2009, 07:34 AM

The Court would know because it would be mentioned in your papers - you HAD to move out to stay safe and now you want back in. It would be part of your legal argument.

That's my best (unfortunately) guess.