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bswc · Sep 15, 2009, 05:53 PM

I thought I was strong, I took a big step backwards, almost to square one!

Last night I checked on her Facebook and every single detail... I thought I was strong enough to handle it! It didn't kill me, but when I went to bed I just couldn't get to sleep! I feeling the effect, some chemicals rushing in my blood. Doesn't seem as serious to me but the effect can't be neglected!

none12345 · Sep 15, 2009, 05:55 PM

That's what you get for not deleting her Facebook. I have heard so many cases people checking Facebook and ruined their healing process. Heck it even happened to me but then I learned my lesson and deleted every contact I have with her immediately.

bswc · Sep 15, 2009, 06:03 PM

Agh, I feel my stomach growling since then!

none12345 · Sep 15, 2009, 06:06 PM

Do yourself a favour and delete all contact with her if you know what is good for yah =P

bswc · Sep 17, 2009, 03:42 AM

I got news from her saying she regret breaking up with me due to a simple crush with another person. Situation going complicated..

amicon · Sep 17, 2009, 04:03 AM

So now she wants a fallback guy as her crush didn't work out?That's not complicated that's a classic and you should avoid falling into that trap.Focus on yourself let her be and get on with your own life-you re not responsible for anyone else's at this moment in time.

talaniman · Sep 17, 2009, 07:57 AM

So a SIMPLE crush on another, broke up this relationship? That's a big red flag that tells you she was not as happy as she said, or seemed.

Something you need to look at, is if the crush developed as she hoped, would she have regretted her break up, and would the crush still be so simple then?

I don't think so, and you better heed the red flag, and heal, before you get sucked back in.

Her impulsive actions ended this, and your healing will keep it that way, or at least allow you to make a decision based on facts, and not just feelings.

This isn't all that complicated, she thought the grass was greener in the other yard, and found out it wasn't, at least not this time.

Talaniman Rule-When you see someones true colors, believe your eyes, not your hurt heart.

bswc · Sep 17, 2009, 08:12 AM

Oh yeah, thanks for the reminders. A classic prob needs to be solved the classic way. Heal and we'll see how it goes after that! Just reming myself to keep calm and cool always.

talaniman · Sep 17, 2009, 08:37 AM

And busy.

I wish · Sep 19, 2009, 09:27 AM

So she's finally done experimenting, now she's going to her backup plan, which is you.
Don't fall for that. Keep moving forward. Don't let her hinder your progress.

By the way, I hope that you've deleted her from Facebook. Don't allow yourself to be tortured by going to her page. It's really unhealthy. You're better off spending your time doing something else. Don't forget, there are 5,999,999,999 other people in this world.

bswc · Sep 19, 2009, 10:46 AM

I went far beyond that, gained unrevealed truths about the ex and used it as a nitros to move on. When I look back the pass few months, its shocking. I'm amazed by how this breakup change my life, I'm no more a loser, coward, sissy, clingy guy. Breakup gave me the opportunity to express my feelings more. I used to be a boy of few words to express myself, deep thought but nvr express it, uses my heart to speak. Now I get my brain working. When I look in a mirror I couldn't even remember myself before, inside and outside! Couldn't have done it without you ladies and gentlemen!

amicon · Sep 19, 2009, 11:09 AM

Keep that good brain working!:-)

bswc · Oct 6, 2009, 03:48 AM

Thanks for all the sharing ladies and gentlemen on the board! This place have got me thinking like a man, be like a man :)

DevilNam · Oct 6, 2009, 04:15 AM

Yeah, love makes your brain really blind xD, I'm blind right now... really I admire your strength. Omg, I love to read the person's developments on this site...

bswc · Oct 7, 2009, 02:41 AM

Thank you there, if u know u're blind then u better don't look or imagine stuffs that u can't see for the moment wait till the moment your eyes OPENED :)

bswc · Nov 14, 2009, 04:37 AM

I'm back with updates. I've been watching movies lately. Almost everyday and some motivates me, and some reminds me of my life. I've been making progress, but I know there's still a long way to go.

I have a question, if u did become a friend of your ex in the future and he/she ask u about things that happened after the breakup and how did u feel and what did u do. What would u say? I have 2 versions in my head:
1.Lie
2.Painful truth

bswc · Jan 11, 2010, 02:22 AM

Update:
After so many months, I've been doing fine. Guess my ex has got partner(s). I don't wan to have any comment on this. It stings I have to admit this. Just trying to accept the fact that I'm growing and learning and I couldn't help her with her part. I don't know why it hurts to say this, perhaps it's the little part that hasn't fully healed + the flashbacks when I got back to my hometown.

amicon · Jan 11, 2010, 02:37 AM

Complete healing takes time and those little stabs of pain are normal I'd say. Just acknowledge the emotion and then let it go.
You'll continue growing stronger and your life will go on regardless.

bswc · Jan 11, 2010, 02:55 AM

Yes, thank you for your response. I just roughly covered my own post, and I couldn't believe this. My ex killed the old me. It's the new me now,I was so immature. Right now that I have learnt from all you people and experiences from all around the world, I find it hard to live in my place, my "closed" culture.

amicon · Jan 11, 2010, 03:16 AM

I don't know where in the world you are-somewhere on the Asian continent? I can only add that we all,here,learn so much from each other and that your own experiences will help others.