[have questions]

Thanks for the help in advace! I need it!
We are both in our mid 20's and have had an on and off relasionship. More on than off, but it hasn't been easy. About 2 month ago she was acting a bit distant and then she dumped me. She told me she was talking to another guy. She has always been unsure of what she wants. We both agree we are closer to each other than anyone ever before. We are very good friends. We quit talking all together. I wanted to give her time and space. She always comes back. We talk and work out the issues, useually dumd stuff. Well, she is back and wants us to be friends, good friends but she still is seeing the new guy. We had a very long talk and I told her just how strongly I feel about her. She feels the same. I told her I intended to marry he someday. She didn't realize I was that serious about marriage. Now we are as close as ever but she doesn't think she can leave her new relationship. She says he is nice and they get along very well. She doesn't see the future with him that she does with me. She doesn't want to leave something that is working but she still loves me too. Her words that come from her hart say we should go for it but she won't actually do it. I don't now how to get her to let it go and come back to me. I want her to do it on her own anyway, not because I told her to. We both think it's different this time and it will work for the long term. I am having trouble with being friends when I love her. I don't know if I should quit talking to her or not. She will keep missing me if I stay away. She needs to make a desission but I don't think she will if she don't have to. What do I do? She has 2 yuong kids and we all do very well together, they love me. I love her and feel like she is the one! What should I do?

[N0help4u]

She was already confused enough with just the two of you. Now she is in a relationship with someone else so that complicates it even more so most likely if you continue friends with her it is just going to confuse and complicate things more. I would tell her LATER.

[redhed35]

She is with someone else,but keeping you on the back burner in case it does not work out.

She is treating you like a fool,and your letting her.

Give her all the freedom she wants,start no contact and leave this women to her new relationship.

She does not love you!

Are you now a friends with benefits?

Is that what you want?
She is disrespecting you,let her to find another chump cause your done.

[kctiger]

Thanks for the help in advace! I need it!
We are both in our mid 20's and have had an on and off relasionship. More on than off, but it hasn't been easy. About 2 mounth ago she was acting a bit distant and then she dumped me. She told me she was talking to another guy. ?

Nuff said... lack of respect for you and complete disregard for your feelings...

Translation:

Should I waint for her and still be friends?

Hell NO!! :cool:

[I wish]

You're become her "backup plan".

She's trying things out with this new guy first while keeping you around just in case it doesn't work out with this new guy. If she breaks up with him, she can always go back to you.

If she ever does come back to you, how long do you think she will take before she breaks up again to try it out with another guy.

Stop letting her drag you around and move on with your life. Stop talking to her, otherwise, you will just keep over-analyzing everything she says. She's taken now, so she's off limits nor matter how you see it. Furthermore, she's cheating on her boyfriend by talking to you the way she does.

All these red flags are only based on what you told us, I'm sure there are more if you continued your story.

[N0help4u]

I don't think you are exactly her back up plan but in effect you are.

Her + you=
Much chemistry X Toxic relationship=
crazy about each other but 2 explosive

Her + her current bf=
get along +everything runs smooth=
a 'normal' relationship

she is weighing and leaning toward the normal and not sure she can deal with the TNT

I really don't see her coming back
but she likes the idea of you being in the back ground for the back up plan.

Here is a search engine on toxic relationships

Toxic relationships - Yahoo! Search Results

If you give me your and her birthday month/date/year
I can see if I can give you more insight on this.