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Jake291980 · Sep 7, 2009, 11:00 AM

I've been going to this strip club lately and its only been like once a week. I have a couple friends that work there and that's why I go. Lately I have been talking to this one stripper. We talk just about every time I'm there and she seems really nice. She has only been dancing for a month she told me and she did have a real job before stripping. She said that she worked at a restaurant as a server but, they shut down. I've heard of the restaurant before and I know they did shut down. She doesn't really seem like she just wants my money since she will come up from time to time just to talk. She has asked to see if I wanted a lap dance but, I told her that I don't buy them. She said that that is cool and we still talked for a little bit. We don't talk all night because I know she has to work. She has already told me her real name and I didn't have to ask her. I was at the club last Friday and we talked for a little bit. I did tip her on stage like $2 and when she came up to me I told her that she doesn't have to do any special type of dance for me. I just tipped her and I just thought that that might make her think that I'm not like any of the other people there who just wants to give them money to see them naked. It seems like this is a safe club to work at because I think the staff is good and they also have cameras in the VIP rooms to where they give lap dances. They just don't want people touching the girls I guess. So anyway I wouldn't mind getting to know this stripper. She seems like she doesn't want my money she just likes to talk. I was just hoping I could get some good answers or some advice. Thanks

ITstudent2006 · Sep 7, 2009, 11:07 AM

Here's one thing you have to keep in mind. At the end of the day no matter what she's says and/or how she acts, she is a stripper. They get paid for being sexy, passionate and intrigueing. Now I am not saying that she's lying to you, I am just saying take what she says with a grain of salt. Be intrigued, be interested but be aware and stay focused because thinking with the wrong head will only get you into a huge mess.

Here's my thought. She is a stripper. She gets paid to be that way. To see what she is really like, ask her to socialize in a more professional atmoshpere. Ie: take her out to eat, go to a movie, standard date things. This will show you who she really is and how she really is.

Good Luck but stay focused!

Rick

talaniman · Sep 7, 2009, 11:35 AM

Not to be harsh, but she makes a living getting guys to like her. Having said that, it takes a really confident secure male to date a stripper, just because the jealousy will drive you crazy. Happens to the best of us, we fall hard for their charms, and let what she does for a living get the best of us.

Yes its easy to get carried away by her, but trust me, if you think you can handle what she does, and is probably good at it, think again, and real hard, because all you will see is the competition, and there will be a lot of that. (at least that's what your fears, and insecurities, will tell you.)

I know the first thing you'll think is she can get another job, and no more lap dances with strange guys for money. NOT happening guy.

Quit hanging around strip clubs so much fella, your an easy target. Thats the real deal, as they see guys like you coming.

artlady · Sep 7, 2009, 11:42 AM

You have already been given expert advice.

I would only add that strip clubs are very expensive,even though your tipping seems to be rather cheap.

Repeat customers is the name of the game so if you sees you as someone who will return,she will give you all kinds of false signals.

It's a business and you are a client.

Save your money for something with a better return.

Catsmine · Sep 7, 2009, 11:50 AM

See if she'd like to hang with you and your friends, away from work like ITstudent says. If that works, maybe a coffee before work, then breakfast after work, THEN a movie or a show.

Jake291980 · Sep 7, 2009, 08:00 PM

I was just wondering if it is OK to go to a strip club once a week. As long as your not spending so much on the dancers. Like lets say your there just spending $10 or $20 when your there. I was just hoping if that could be OK for a single guy. Thanks hope to get some answers

devilicious24 · Sep 7, 2009, 08:03 PM

Ya it's OK.. Everyone has needs. Just don't get carried away..

Jake291980 · Sep 8, 2009, 09:27 PM

I just got out of a relationship 8 months ago and I'm ready to be in another one. I just moved to this college town and there is like 6 colleges here. I'm going to some college bars this weekend that are down town. I've always been one of them shy guys to approach a girl to talk to. I'm not shy if they start talking to me first. So I'm just asking about how to aproach someone and start a good conversation. Sometimes when I'm at a bar I get some girls that will smile at me. I usually don't say anything to them though. I have a good job and I have my own place. I don't think I will have trouble finding another girl. I just need some advice about how to aproach someone and start a good conversation. Hope to get some good answers. Thanks

shian109 · Sep 8, 2009, 11:36 PM

No matter what, girls like feel nice...
U nice, even u shy or bad. They still like.

babycakes 19 · Sep 8, 2009, 11:39 PM

It all depends... I mean me personally I'm a fool for bad boys just because there fun and easy to get... but if your the type of shy guy that talks to people then that' ite too. I know this guy Marcus and he doesn't really talk to anyone and he is really hot which is a shame because if you try to approach him he is always eally quite... so it really depends

kctiger · Sep 9, 2009, 05:45 AM

Girls like bad BOYS... WOMEN like MEN whow are confident in themselves and know how to listen and treat them with the respect they deserve. Know the difference.

Read my thread on this subject:

Guys afraid of talking to girls (Click)

zippit · Sep 9, 2009, 06:03 AM

Any GIRL that is worth talking too will ONLY like REAL guys,if your not being yourself your bieng fake.
Nice guys who try to act bad fail
visa-versa
Be yourself ALWAYS

I wish · Sep 9, 2009, 06:09 AM

Try meeting girls in other locations. Girls at a bar will have their guard up because lots of guys will hit on them. For example, join a club(s) in school that you're interested in, that way you will be able to meet someone with at least something in common, which makes it easier to talk.

Most important part is to be yourself and be confident about it. Being good or bad won't make a difference, the girl will eventually find out who you really are anyway. So it's better to just be yourself.

Jake291980 · Sep 9, 2009, 08:09 PM

I work at this big store and there's a few girls that I'm interested in. I talk to them sometimes and they seem nice. They don't work in my department they all work in different departments. I know that there is some people that are dating each other from where I work. If I do date them we won't be around each other all the time so, I don't think it would be to bad. I know that the bars or strip clubs are not the right place to meet a good girl. Besides I am getting sick of the bar scenes. I am one of them shy guys but, since I see the girls that I'm interested in at work all the time I'm not that shy since I see them all the time. So I just want to know if there are any people out there that have dated people that they worked with and I would like to know if it would be a good idea for me to date one. By the way the general manager of the store is dating one also so, I don't think I will get fired if I decide to ask one of them out. Like I said before we won't be around each other all the time since we work in different departments. I hope to get some good advice.

Scleros · Sep 9, 2009, 08:35 PM

Personally, I think it is a bad idea for these reasons:

It may be against company policy...regardless of what the boss does.
If the relationship blows up, each of you may still have to see each other. Plus then,
- Do you date someone else at work in full view of the prior person you were dating? That's just cruel, particularly if the breakup wasn't mutual and one party still harbors feelings.
If the relationship doesn't blow up, you see each other nonstop at work and at home which can be its own type of challenge.

Overall, I think the ease of accessibility to available people is outweighed by the additional challenges. But then again, I'd never say never if that cute honey in the next cubicle just had to have me. :rolleyes:

More food for thought:
AskMen.com - Dating a Coworker

Clough · Sep 9, 2009, 08:45 PM

Hi, Jake291980!

Scleros has made some outstanding points! I would just like to add that, if it were me, I wouldn't take the risk. We're not talking about meeting people at church or private parties in peoples' homes. You would be having a potentially close and intimate relationship with someone in the place where you're getting paid to do a job.

To me, it's risky enough just trying to keep a job without adding any other "playing pieces" to it.

Thanks!

I wish · Sep 10, 2009, 06:06 AM

Might I suggest that you become regular friends. If you start hanging out outside of work, then maybe they can "introduce you" or "set you up" with other girls who don't work at the same place as you. That would probably be more appropriate.

Jake291980 · Sep 13, 2009, 07:49 PM

I've been going to this strip club once a week and I don't really spend a lot of money there. I say no more then $60 when I'm there. I was just wondering if strippers ever date there custormers. I've heard of some of them dancers that have or are right now. I am interested in a couple and I do talk to them a lot and they are going to school right now. There not just trying to strip for the rest of there life. I guess I wouldn't mind asking one of them out on a date and I was just wondering if anyone out there know if they ever do date there custermors. The ones that I talk to don't really ask me for money all the time when I'm there. They seem like they just like talking. So I hope I can get some good advice. Thanks.

DerelictHerds · Sep 13, 2009, 07:56 PM

Their job is to talk and be friendly to you. It'll keep you coming back.

You got more class than that, come on. Don't date a stripper.

excon · Sep 13, 2009, 08:00 PM

Originally Posted by Jake291980

Is it ok for a single guy to go to a strip club once a week?

Hello Jake:

Is it OK with WHO? Me?? Sure. Have a good time. Your momma? I don't know. Your girlfriend? I don't know. Anybody?? I don't know. Who do you have to please out there besides yourself? If you like going, go. Screw what other people think.

excon