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crisluvsu731 · Aug 25, 2009, 02:19 PM

So, I have been thinking, me and my boyfriend of 2 years use to have great sex, now it's getting rocky. Well, I use to feel him inside me really well, now it seems that I can hardly feel him and it's hard for me to get off. He has put some weight on since we first got together and I am wondering if him gaining weight could have made his penis a little smaller, because I notice that there is quite a bit of meat around his area. Am I just overthinking this?

mugger · Aug 25, 2009, 02:37 PM

Yes a man's size will change. Weight gain will decrease his size because there is more fat around the pubic area hindering length.
Also, the older a man gets it will decrease in size.
Tell him his penis will get longer if he looses weight. Don't quote me on this, but I believe the ratio is 1/2" gain for every 30 lbs. lost.

twinkiedooter · Aug 25, 2009, 02:37 PM

No, this is not your imagination working overtime here. It's the truth. When men gain weight, their penis shape and size does change. The more weight they gain the smaller the member becomes. Why do you think the skinny dudes all have long, big penises? Not your imagination here.

crisluvsu731 · Aug 25, 2009, 02:44 PM

Ok, that's a releif (how ever you spell it). He is only about 3 1/2" right now. The guy I was with before him was 7" and I got off every time and I feel horrible that I can't get off with my boyfriend now. I know I am not loose, he tells me how tight I am and how good it feels, but that is him, not me. Does that make me a horrible person?

kp2171 · Aug 25, 2009, 02:49 PM

Well, how did you "feel" him? Is he not as hard? Don't feel him as deep? Do you tend to have "clitoral" orgasms or "g spot" (a lot of controversy about this, 50 years after it was first talked about, but still)...

Weight gain can add to area around the base of the penis. Also, weight gain/lack of exercise/stressors might make him not as "hard" as he was before... there are a TON of things that alone, or in little bits, can tie into ED issues... such as him not being as hard as he once was.

Also... you are also "used to the routine"... do you need more time and more sensitization? Do you need more control over position?

I guess lets start with the basics...

When you were with him before, or other lovers, were you able to reach orgasm? I know this seems really detailed, but the more you can talk, the better we can understand your situation.

Were you able to reach orgasm with him? What positions seemed to work best for you (with him or others)?

Does he seem not as hard? Are there other stressors going on? Financial? Relationship? Hit a plateau (even if that means a "comfort level)?

More info please...

I know the question was about him, but I think we need to look at both of you to understand what's going on...

kp2171 · Aug 25, 2009, 02:52 PM

You are not a bad person for feeling what you feel.

The other lover was longer... any chance he might have hit against your cervix when he thrusted? Some women perceive this as pain, but some perceive this as pleasure.

But you've said things were OK at the beginning of the relationship, right?

crisluvsu731 · Aug 25, 2009, 03:02 PM

He is still just as hard as before. He just seems shorter. A little stress but he initiates it every time. He wants it 2 or 3 times a day if I will. I reached orgasm every time with other guys and a few times when me and my boyfriend now got together. He has talked about adding a female into the picture and I am totally against it. Then I started thinking, maybe I will let another girl be added if he allows another guy to be added. I think it is only fair. Right?

crisluvsu731 · Aug 25, 2009, 03:03 PM

Yea, things were great at first. I just feel like a horrible girlfriend for having these thoughts.

Gemini54 · Aug 25, 2009, 03:48 PM

Originally Posted by crisluvsu731

He is still just as hard as before. he just seems shorter. A little stress but he initiates it everytime. He wants it 2 or 3 times a day if I will. I reached orgasm everytime with other guys and a few times when me and my boyfriend now got together. He has talked about adding a female into the picture and I am totally against it. Then I started thinking, maybe I will let another girl be added if he allows another guy to be added. I think it is only fair. Right?

My alarm bells are ringing her. If there are issues in your sexual relationship, the worse thing you can do is add another person to the equation.

Weight gain will add some meat to the base of the penis which will impact on the length and the amount of penetration you feel, but does not affect the girth.

You two need to be talking to each other about improving the connection between you and using positions where you can feel his penis better. Talk about how you might improve your capacity to orgasm and experiment with some different moves. Doggy position is always good for feeling a man's penis.

I'd also suggest that you work on your relationship outside of the bedroom. It sounds as if some walking and exercise might help him and get you doing something else together!