[Refentsez momi]

I''m 14 weeks 3 days pregnant and I hardly ask my boyfriend for anything (well financially which is my personal choice). I am moody and tend to be needy emotionally though. I find that the smallest thing he does or doesn' t do makes me cry and he always seems to achieve that. I'm aware I can be difficult but isn't that a result of my pregnancy? Anyway whenever I ask him to get me something it's always a mission so I end up getting frustrated and pissed and tell him to forget it. As mentioned earlier I've basically taken care of all of the finances needed in the pregnancy until now so it does upset me if he can't satisfy my simple craving. I know he doesn't mean to hurt me and he will start getting more involved financially because he is going to handle our cultural and marriage expenses but until then can't he help out a bit now and be more sensitive to my emotions? Please don't get me wrong, he is a great man who loves me an I love him (infact my friends even say I'm lucky to have him and I'm too demanding) but I'm the one who is pregnant here and until I give birth to our healthy baby and my hormones calm down he should do everything to keep my stress levels down and keep me happy right?

[N0help4u]

You need to ask him why is it so difficult to help you out.
Is all this since your pregnancy or have things been this pattern all along?
Are you wanting pampered and attention when maybe you really don't need it?
Does he help around the house at all?
Are you using your pregnancy as a crutch to get more attention?
Maybe you are stressing yourself by expecting too much

You need to make a check list of pro's and con's and figure out where you are being a little unreasonable and what is realistic.

Other than not pampering you what are his other faults?

[Alty]

I'm sorry, but expecting special treatment because you're pregnant, doesn't sit well with me.

I've had two kids. I was extremely ill with the second one.

My husband did what he could, but not because I expected him to.

The whole

I'm aware I can be difficult but isn't that a result of my pregnancy

just sounds like an excuse to me.

[frostybabygurl]

Have you tried talking with him about how you feel? Perhaps wording things in a certain way may put him on the defensive. I am a mother of 2, I just gave birth to my son 2 months ago, I can sympathize in regards to the hormones and mood swings, however pregnancy isn't an excuse, whenever I felt like I was in a mood or feeling irrational, I tried to keep to myself. My man offered to do things all the time and it actually made me crazy. As much as you feel like you want special treatment, if you were getting it you would probably complain that you don't need to be doted on, and you can carry things etc...
I agree that he should help you be as stress free as possible, however cravings don't fall into that category. Aside from him loving you and being a great guy, the only thing you should be expecting is his support, whether it be financial, emotional, physical etc...
Pregnancy isn't like the movies or romance novels and neither are the people that it happens to.
You should be happy that you have in you words such a great and wonderful guy, think of all the women out there who get beat down, dumped or cheated on while they are pregnant and count your lucky stars.

[J_9]

I am not with the whole sympathy thing either... and I'm a labor and delivery nurse!
This "satisfy a simple craving..." Is it like getting up and going to the kitchen for something to eat or drink? Get up and get it for yourself, you need the exercise.

As a nurse, I understand the hormone fluctuations and how they work, how they influence our bodies. But you can't use that as an excuse.

[tashie1245]

I think he should understand that your pregnant and that little things like getting you a cupcake or something mean a lot to you... I know when I was pregnant and I asked my boyfriend for something and he acted like I was asking him for the world when in reality it was as simple as a tissue it irratated me. I think he should be a little bit more understand and realize that right now you need him emotionally and physically.

[N0help4u]

Guys and girls are wired different and often when you want to be 'bothering' them with little things it can get them annoyed with you because they do not see it that way.
Some guys like girls that can fend for themselves especially over little things.

The way they see it is what would you be doing if I weren't here to be helping you?

My x never helped me. I had to pack and move at least twice with my pregnancies and I even drove myself 20 miles to the hospital in labor with my second.

[mamaof2boys]

Being pregnant and all that comes with it is to prepare you for how it will be once you give birth. You never stop going. With both of my kids I was on bed rest and did most things for myself. Not because my husband didn't want to help, but because I'm a grown woman and can do things for myself. When my second son came home from the hospital (he was in the nicu) my husband had to work so I went to the hospital with my 2 yr old and picked up my son by myself and came home by myself on the first night of having 2 kids at home. You just hae to grow up and do it. And yes he should be understanding but if you become too demanding you are going to push him away and have a very irritated first time father on your hands.

[Refentsez momi]

I'm sorry ladies but I certainly don't agree with most of what you are saying. You make it sound like I'm asking my boyfriend to get me a piece of the moon! When I say simple craving I mean just that, SIMPLE. I'm talking going to the get me popcorn during the day when the shop is in walking distance. I haven't had a painfree pregnancy so NO I'm not keen on doing it myself as most of you are so quick to say. Besides I wasn't doing it myself when this baby was conceived. Thankfully I took the advice to really talk to him and being such a great man as said he now understands and gets me little things he knows I like without me even asking him. I don't care what anyone says but if your partner loves you he shouldn't be irritated by your small requests.

[mudweiser]

I'm sorry ladies but I certainly don't agree with most of what you are saying. You make it sound like I'm asking my boyfriend to get me a piece of the moon! When I say simple craving I mean just that, SIMPLE. I'm talking going to the get me popcorn during the day when the shop is in walking distance. I haven't had a painfree pregnancy so NO I'm not keen on doing it myself as most of you are so quick to say. Besides I wasn't doing it myself when this baby was concieved. Thankfully I took the advice to really talk to him and being such a great man as said he now understands and gets me little things he knows I like without me even asking him. I don't care what anyone says but if your partner loves you he shouldn't be irritated by your small requests.

I don't believe anyone experiences a pain free pregnancy.

I understand the part where you want your partner to help you, however if it's popcorn from a store that's walking distance you should get it yourself. You do need exercise when pregnant.

Right now your sounding out to be one of those pregnant drama queens. Sorry darlin' but women have been giving birth for centuries, your not the only one ;)

I'm glad you spoke to your partner- communication is key to a healthy relationship.

Your right, if your partner loves you he shouldn't be irritated with your small requests, however, asking for one often will get to you no matter how much you love the person.

Right now your carrying his child, you're the one going through the body changes, yadda yadda yadda. Ever think that he could go be going through some stuff as well? Maybe he's worried about being a father, about the medical bills, how his dream car will be put on hold, how sex is going to be like after birth--- may not seem like big things to you but I'm sure it is to him.

If you can do it, do it. You should make your pregnancy a memorable one for the both of you. Not one that is "honey could you---".

Sarah

[Refentsez momi]

I used to be a choreographer/ dancer so trust me when I say I know all about exercise and I'm having plenty of it. I'm also hard at work at University so its not like I'm loafing around all day. I have a very small frame- short and tiny- and when I say I haven't had a painfree pregnancy I mean something out of the ordinary. Anyway, I know he has his own worries and he knows I'm always there for him when he needs to talk about them but I don't understand why you would bring them up mudweiser because I don't ask him to neglect his worries in any way.

[mudweiser]

...he is a great man who loves me an I love him (infact my friends even say I'm lucky to have him and I'm too demanding)

Your lucky to have him.

Is he lucky to have you? Someone whom is demanding.

I brought those things up because from what I read it seemed to me that you were just concerned about your needs and your needs only.

Sarah