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    Iceman74MJD's Avatar
    Iceman74MJD Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Aug 13, 2009, 03:42 PM
    Stopping Child Support
    I just saw my daughter after not seeing or having any contact with her after about 10 years or so. My daughter came down here, I spent close to a thousand dollars on her while she was here, and the whole time she was here, no matter what we did, she was texting with her friends and boyfriend back home. Now that she is home again, she wants nothing to do with me. She made the statement at one time that if I wanted to stop paying child support, that she didn't have a problem with it and I could. My daughter, who is 16, lives with her mother in NY and has about $15,000 dollars in the bank from all the child support over the years. Her mother and I never got married, because her mother took off when my daughter was 10 months old. My wife now is experiencing major medical issues, and I need all the money I make for that. Would the court see this as a hardship and how would I go about it? On top of that, she has made it clear that she doesn't want anything to do with me, and would that play a part of terminating the child support order? I do not even know where to start. Help.
    N0help4u's Avatar
    N0help4u Posts: 19,823, Reputation: 2035
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    #2

    Aug 13, 2009, 03:47 PM

    No you can't stop child support
    No it doesn't matter how much they have in the bank.
    No it doesn't matter if you see her or not
    -visitation and support are two separate things.
    No it doesn't matter how much you spent on her while she was there.

    You CAN go back to court and get the support modified if your income has decreased from what it originally was when the support was determined.
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
    Computer Expert and Renaissance Man
     
    #3

    Aug 13, 2009, 06:03 PM

    Your daughter has absolutely no say in whether you pay support or not. Assuming the support is court ordered only a court can stop it and they are unlikely to.

    As to not seeing her for 10 years, weren't you awarded visitation? Did you pursue visitation?
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #4

    Aug 13, 2009, 06:35 PM

    You can not stop child support, child has no say. All 16 year old do nothing but text friends
    stinawords's Avatar
    stinawords Posts: 2,071, Reputation: 150
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    #5

    Aug 13, 2009, 11:09 PM

    I agree with all the above posts. The child is the one that the money is to be spent on per how the custodial parent sees fit. If the custodial parent is lucky enough to earn enough money that the support can accumulate in a separate account for the child later in life great. However, it isn't up to the child it isn't their money it is money to help cover their costs. Also, I wouldn't want all that much to do with you if I hadn't seen or heard from you in ten years (provided you were my father) and I'm not even a teenager anymore didn't you pursue your visitation rights? You can ask for a support modification but keep in mind that it won't always go down it can also go up if there were changes to cause it to increase rather than decrease.
    nikosmom's Avatar
    nikosmom Posts: 1,611, Reputation: 488
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    #6

    Aug 14, 2009, 12:22 AM

    How do you know how much money she has in the bank? Not that it matters, because that's not going to be used as a basis for reducing the support.

    Also the fact that you chose not to see your child for the last 10 years doesn't have anything to do with support. Nor does the fact that you spent money on her while she visited.
    Synnen's Avatar
    Synnen Posts: 7,927, Reputation: 2443
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    #7

    Aug 14, 2009, 08:08 AM

    I'm sorry to hear about your wife.

    HOWEVER--that does not stop your responsibilities (like child support) towards your daughter.
    twinkiedooter's Avatar
    twinkiedooter Posts: 12,172, Reputation: 1054
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    #8

    Aug 14, 2009, 01:11 PM

    Child support can only be stopped or reduced by court order and not a 16 year old spoiled brat's say so. (Gosh if it was that easy everyone would do it).

    The money in the bank unfortunately is technically not yours any longer. It was to be used toward your daughter's benefit. The fact your present wife is ill has no bearing on the money in the bank.

    Sorry she was so ungrateful during her visits. Looks like she doesn't need you in her life at this point but she may later on in life. Just be sure she doesn't want to "borrow" money from you as she won't be paying it back.

    Petition the judge for a reduction in support. It just might be granted due to hardship but I wouldn't hold my breath on that one.

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