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    The Doll's Avatar
    The Doll Posts: 8, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Jul 29, 2009, 07:25 AM
    Tips on Confessions
    Hi all,

    I've known this guy who is very nice to me, for almost a year now. We're together with each other most of the time - Go to work together, work together, go home together, and go out together.

    Recently, I discovered that I actually have feelings for him. Everyone thinks that we're in love with each other, or dating. They often tease us, but his reaction would be only to smile.

    So one day, I confessed to him and he said that he too, had feelings for me. However he said he needed time as he prefers to go slowly and did not want to rush me. Just this week, he said that he would give me an answer soon, because he needs time to prepare and thinks it would be more sincere to do so in real life.

    How should I react when 'the time has come?' Any tips? It seems desperate if he were to ask me for a relationship and I accept straight away. Is it okay? Please help.
    I wish's Avatar
    I wish Posts: 5,296, Reputation: 2030
    Family & People Expert
    		  
    #2

    Jul 29, 2009, 07:27 AM

    There's no way to anticipate what he's going to do. Just wait and see what he does and act accordingly. It's probably better to have a genuine response than preparing yourself! Just respond the way you are most comfortable with. I'm sure he would appreciate an honest response.

    Things sound good so far!
    jmw0713's Avatar
    jmw0713 Posts: 1,012, Reputation: 305
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    #3

    Jul 29, 2009, 07:30 AM

    I don't think it would be desperate if you accepted the relationship right away. You have been good friends for a while. If he wants to take it to the next level, do it. No need to play games.

    If you both feel the same way about each other, then let things progress naturally, like they have been so far.
    kctiger's Avatar
    kctiger Posts: 3,653, Reputation: 1319
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    #4

    Jul 29, 2009, 08:56 AM

    By rushing life you get cheated out of the enjoyment it has to offer. Be calm, relax and just have fun. Things will happen on their own without trying if you just go with the flow.
    Ash123's Avatar
    Ash123 Posts: 1,793, Reputation: 305
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    #5

    Jul 29, 2009, 10:11 AM

    I'd take the pressure off him 100%...

    No strange behavior new plans... just be normal.

    If he wants to date, have a discussion about what you might have to deal with at work and home though. I think you all could have fun and clearly you like each other - but living apart would make it easier than spending 24 hours together! Even another job would help...
    The Doll's Avatar
    The Doll Posts: 8, Reputation: 1
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    #6

    Jul 30, 2009, 04:42 AM

    Well, okay. Thanks, guys. But something's weird, he said he'll give me an answer tomorrow, and he has asked me to go gym with him straight after work.

    Isn't it weird? I don't go to gyms and he knows that. Now I don't know how to reject him as because I don't want to go.

    1) It's expensive.
    2) I don't think it's worth the money.
    3) I feel uneasy working out in public with strangers around.
    4) I'd be too tired after work.
    5) It's so troublesome to bring my shoes and work-out clothes along with me to work.

    Now what?
    kctiger's Avatar
    kctiger Posts: 3,653, Reputation: 1319
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    #7

    Jul 30, 2009, 05:41 AM

    Now what?? You either go or don't go, not big deal. Make a choice and stick with it, this isn't life or death.
    I wish's Avatar
    I wish Posts: 5,296, Reputation: 2030
    Family & People Expert
    		  
    #8

    Jul 30, 2009, 06:01 AM

    If you like him and you end up with him, you'll probably have to compromise even more in the future. Going to the gym is a really small thing.

    You just have to ask yourself how much you like him.
    Ash123's Avatar
    Ash123 Posts: 1,793, Reputation: 305
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    #9

    Jul 30, 2009, 06:23 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by The Doll View Post
    Well, okay. Thanks, guys. But something's weird, he said he'll give me an answer tomorrow, and he has asked me to go gym with him straight after work.

    Isn't it weird? I don't go to gyms and he knows that. Now I don't know how to reject him as because I don't wanna go.

    1) It's expensive.
    2) I don't think it's worth the money.
    3) I feel uneasy working out in public with strangers around.
    4) I'd be too tired after work.
    5) It's so troublesome to bring my shoes and work-out clothes along with me to work.

    Now what?
    Relax. He said a gym not a firing range...
    U think it was a way to get rid of you?
    Maybe suggest you talk over a smoothie first...

    A
    N0help4u's Avatar
    N0help4u Posts: 19,823, Reputation: 2035
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    #10

    Jul 30, 2009, 06:28 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by The Doll View Post
    Well, okay. Thanks, guys. But something's weird, he said he'll give me an answer tomorrow, and he has asked me to go gym with him straight after work.

    Isn't it weird? I don't go to gyms and he knows that. Now I don't know how to reject him as because I don't wanna go.

    1) It's expensive.
    2) I don't think it's worth the money.
    3) I feel uneasy working out in public with strangers around.
    4) I'd be too tired after work.
    5) It's so troublesome to bring my shoes and work-out clothes along with me to work.

    Now what?
    If it is a one time free to his guest thing I would maybe take him up on it but
    To decline simply say I am not into the gym scene maybe something else someday.

    That way you leave it open to the fact that it is not him you are turning down and you are willing to still go somewhere with him.

    KCT stole my words go with the flow
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