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    sbahr94's Avatar
    sbahr94 Posts: 11, Reputation: 2
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    #1

    Jul 25, 2009, 02:06 PM
    Marriage for a 16 & 21 to get married
    I want to get married one day, but I was wondering where I could get married in what state for me and my fiancée to get marry in. Without him getting in trouble.

    My mother is in jail, and my grandma said she would give me concent if needed.


    But is there a state I don't need it?

    Me 16 & him 21
    sbahr94's Avatar
    sbahr94 Posts: 11, Reputation: 2
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    #2

    Jul 25, 2009, 02:08 PM
    Marriage for a 16 & 21 to get married
    Marriage for a 16 & 21 to get married
    I want to get married one day, but I was wondering where I could get married in what state for me and my fiancée to get marry in. Without him getting in trouble.

    My mother is in jail, and my grandma said she would give me concent if needed.


    But is there a state I don't need it?

    Me 16 & him 21
    N0help4u's Avatar
    N0help4u Posts: 19,823, Reputation: 2035
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    #3

    Jul 25, 2009, 02:09 PM

    What state do you live in?
    N0help4u's Avatar
    N0help4u Posts: 19,823, Reputation: 2035
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    #4

    Jul 25, 2009, 02:10 PM

    Please don't start double posts
    Stick to one.
    sbahr94's Avatar
    sbahr94 Posts: 11, Reputation: 2
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    #5

    Jul 25, 2009, 02:12 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by N0help4u View Post
    What state do you live in?

    IL,
    And sorry.
    N0help4u's Avatar
    N0help4u Posts: 19,823, Reputation: 2035
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    #6

    Jul 25, 2009, 02:25 PM

    Why don't you want your grandmother to sign?

    Illinois: If you are 16 or 17 years of age, you will have to provide a copy of your birth certificate along with some other sort of identification showing your date of birth. You will also need to have the sworn consent from each parent, each legal guardian or a judge - in person - before the county clerk at the time of application. If your parent is deceased, you will need to show a death certificate or proof of guardianship, or a court order waiving consent. A legal guardian will also need to show a certified copy of the guardianship papers. If you are under 16 years of age, you cannot get married

    Marriage Laws in the US by Age

    Age of sexual consent is 17 but some states say with a 4 yr difference. Meaning 17 can be with up to 21.
    AK lawyer's Avatar
    AK lawyer Posts: 12,592, Reputation: 977
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    #7

    Jul 25, 2009, 03:49 PM
    The question is whether there is any state in which a 16 YO doesn't need parental consent.

    The answer is "no".

    Quote Originally Posted by N0help4u View Post
    But Florida seems to come close:

    Florida: If an individual is under 18 years of age, but older than 16 years of age, a marriage license can be obtained with parental consent. If a minor's parents are both deceased and there is not an appointed guardian, he/she may apply for a marriage license. A minor who has been previously married may also apply for a license. A minor who swears that they have a child or are expecting a baby, can apply for a license if the pregnancy has been verified by a written statement from a licensed physician.
    Easy work-around: get pregnant.

    Just kidding. Don't, please.
    jenniepepsi's Avatar
    jenniepepsi Posts: 4,042, Reputation: 533
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    #8

    Jul 25, 2009, 03:58 PM

    Everyone is absolutely right.

    But if you love each other, is there really any rush? Is there a specific reason that you want/need to be married now? Or can you wait until your 18?

    I'm not judging no worries :) just asking :)
    mugger's Avatar
    mugger Posts: 191, Reputation: 26
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    #9

    Jul 25, 2009, 04:34 PM

    What is a 21 year old guy doing with a 16 year old girl- that is very, very wrong. Why would you want to get married at such a young age?
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
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    #10

    Jul 25, 2009, 06:00 PM

    Threads merged.
    hheath541's Avatar
    hheath541 Posts: 2,762, Reputation: 584
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    #11

    Jul 25, 2009, 06:11 PM

    If you can't manage to get a marriage license in your state one of the worst things you could do is go across state lines to get married. Since you are a minor it's illegal for him to take you across state lines and he would risk imprisonment for kidnapping if you tried applying for a marriage license in another state.

    I would suggest waiting the year or two it will take for you to turn 18 to get married. If you are truly in love then your relationship will last until then, and be the stronger for allowing both of you AND the relationship to grow and mature.
    stevetcg's Avatar
    stevetcg Posts: 3,693, Reputation: 353
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    #12

    Jul 25, 2009, 06:41 PM

    Incidentally, the age of consent in IL appears to be 17 so your 'fiance' is also 'felon'

    http://www.moraloutrage.net/staticpa...?page=Illinois
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    stinawords Posts: 2,071, Reputation: 150
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    #13

    Jul 25, 2009, 06:55 PM

    I would strongly suggest waiting until you are 18 and keep your mouth shut if you don't want your "fiance" to end up in jail. In IL the age of concent is 17 (which you are not yet) so that alone can land him in jail. Also as mentioned if he took you across state lines to get married that is kidnapping. Don't rush the marriage thing too many end up in divorce anyway it is okay to wait until you are legal to marry and see if you still want to marry him.
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
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    #14

    Jul 25, 2009, 07:00 PM

    Even if you were to find a state that allowed you to marry, there are residency requirements so you couldn't just go there and tie the knot.

    We are assuming you have already had sex with this guy. If you have, then he has borken the law and committed statutory rape. If your guardians press charges he could wind up in jail.
    N0help4u's Avatar
    N0help4u Posts: 19,823, Reputation: 2035
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    #15

    Jul 25, 2009, 07:04 PM

    Yeah I was thinking about the residency after I left.
    Looks like the closest thing she can do is wait until 17 and have grandma sign for her to get married.
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    jenniepepsi Posts: 4,042, Reputation: 533
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    #16

    Jul 26, 2009, 12:51 AM

    Not trying to argue or anything, but I see a lot of posts about statitiory rape and the legal age of her state. But has the OP even said they have had sex? I mean its not IMPOSSIBLE for a 16 year old and 21 year old to not have sex and simply date. And tahts not illigal.

    Although the chances are slim ;)
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
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    #17

    Jul 26, 2009, 04:06 AM

    Quote Originally Posted by jenniepepsi View Post
    not trying to argue or anything, but i see alot of posts about statitiory rape and the legal age of her state. but has the OP even said they have had sex? i mean its not IMPOSSIBLE for a 16 year old and 21 year old to not have sex and simply date. and tahts not illigal.

    although the chances are slim ;)
    I agree, there is certainly the possibility that they haven't had sex yet. That's why I said we are assuming they have.

    What I'm afraid of here is that this guy is a predator, taking advantage of a girl from a bad home situation (mom in jail, grandma not caring if her granddaughter is involved with a 21 yr old) who wants to get out on her own. I do not see a good future for this marriage.
    N0help4u's Avatar
    N0help4u Posts: 19,823, Reputation: 2035
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    #18

    Jul 26, 2009, 04:10 AM

    Yeah it is not illegal for them to date.
    It is against the law for sex, but then again if somebody wants to press charges like a parent they have to prove it or the girl would have to be pregnant or press charges herself.

    OP needs to just wait until she turns 17 and her grandma can sign for her.
    She can't leave the state because of her age
    She can't get married in another state anyway because of residency laws.
    sbahr94's Avatar
    sbahr94 Posts: 11, Reputation: 2
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    #19

    Jul 26, 2009, 08:42 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by jenniepepsi View Post
    everyone is absolutely right.

    but if you love eachother, is there really any rush? is there a specific reason that you want/need to be married now? or can you wait untill your 18?

    im not judging no worries :) just asking :)

    Well there was before. My mom is an alcoholic lost everything. Words can't explain what she has put me through. She been in and out of the hospital 6 times in just this year of detox! She stop caring for me in the last year. No food , clothes etc. I had to make it on my own. When she saw me doing good she knew she has the parental right to say I have to be with her. Even though she let me live with my boyfriend for the last 8 months. & he been taking care of me too. Cause I am doing school and trying to get a job. & just this weekend she went to jail. On 4 accounts of alcohol & drugs. Plus she has a court date this weds from a different case that includes alcohol. I just don't want her to have any right for being a parent. Cause she hasn't for a year. & Well she is going to face prison time. Now. Well maybe good chance. So my boyfriend ask me to marry him & I said yes. I am so happy. But I am thinking I may just get emancipated instead. & Marriage in a couple of years. I was just wondering. I just don't want to be briought down more with my mom. I want to be happy again. (:
    sbahr94's Avatar
    sbahr94 Posts: 11, Reputation: 2
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    #20

    Jul 26, 2009, 08:47 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by ScottGem View Post
    I agree, there is certainly the possiblity that they haven't had sex yet. That's why I said we are assuming they have.

    What I'm afraid of here is that this guy is a predator, taking advantage of a girl from a bad home situation (mom in jail, grandma not caring if her granddaughter is involved with a 21 yr old) who wants to get out on her own. I do not see a good future for this marriage.


    I know scott, I always keep that in the back of my head. I am the loving person. Who loves to be loved. I never got it from my parents. I fell in love with this guy. & I want a great future for us. But there are always the chances it won't happen. So I am thinking emancipation is the way to go.

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