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    shanny_2006's Avatar
    shanny_2006 Posts: 61, Reputation: 0
    Junior Member
     
    #1

    Oct 25, 2006, 05:49 PM
    Should I still be friends with him?
    My boyfriend broke up with me a couple a weeks ago but he wants to be friends with me. Do u think I should forgive him and just be friends?
    Ace High's Avatar
    Ace High Posts: 191, Reputation: 22
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    #2

    Oct 25, 2006, 06:09 PM
    Shanny,
    Depends on your feelings for him. If you can let go and move on, then that should be no problem. But if every time you are around him and his next potential mate, will it bother you?? If yes, then I would try to make a clean break and not hang around with him. --Ace
    s_cianci's Avatar
    s_cianci Posts: 5,472, Reputation: 760
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    #3

    Oct 25, 2006, 07:01 PM
    You can forgive him but I wouldn't be friends. It's virtually impossible to be friends with an ex. Forgive and forget is the best way to go in this case - forgive him then forget all about him. Get on with your life and do the things you enjoy. Keep busy ; that's the best way to get over an ex.
    Skell's Avatar
    Skell Posts: 1,863, Reputation: 514
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    #4

    Oct 25, 2006, 07:24 PM
    This was posted on another thread with a similar question. I think it is so true. I have just broken up with a long term girlfriend and I think these words below are so true.

    Besides, I think its human nature that unless there is a big exterior motive like children or mutual employment, most people are not capable of setting aside enough of what happened to make friendship really possible. It totally denies the sense of hurt, disappointment and loss that stays with you for a far longer time than you might realise -- it just gets more and more muted. At best we seem to strike a kind of oddly once-intimate but now distant or guarded acquaintanceship with each other as ex's. And that's a long way from friendship, in my book. That and most people, I think, decide that this is someone who got to their heart, it didn't work out and it never will. Another shot at it will make the same outcome, so that makes a lot of motive for guarding their hearts too. Friends are not people you have good reason to guard your heart from. This in not to say an ex is an enemy nor should they be treated badly. Trashing an ex is an copperplate engraved invitation to bad karma LOL. Its just there are friends, there are lovers and well, there are ex's. Capice?

    Sorry to quote you again val, but I couldn't offer anything better than this!
    Skell's Avatar
    Skell Posts: 1,863, Reputation: 514
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    #5

    Oct 25, 2006, 07:26 PM
    In saying that every situation is different.

    If you are young and you didn't invest too much time in one another then perhaps you can be friends with him.

    Only you will know whether this is possible for you or not.

    And if it isn't then there is nothing wrong with that. It just means that you aren't capable of offering your friendship to him in return.

    That is fine and your choice to make and one that many will agree with!

    Good luck!
    Ace High's Avatar
    Ace High Posts: 191, Reputation: 22
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    #6

    Oct 26, 2006, 03:23 AM
    Also if you do try to be friends with him, what happens when you meet the next girl? Do you start comparing yourself to her to find out what he was looking for? It would just be a hurt inside you that you may never find the answers too. Do you start becoming the one that starts bad-talking behind peoples back about things you don't like about her? If you have mutual friends, they may find it uncomfortable to be around if the feeling in the air is unpleasant. Make a clean break and start fresh. Ace
    wap's Avatar
    wap Posts: 177, Reputation: 54
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    #7

    Oct 26, 2006, 03:47 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by shanny_2006
    My boyfriend broke up with me a couple a weeks ago but he wants to be friends with me. Do u think i should forgive him and just be friends?
    My ex said to me we could still be friends, I don't think we would be able to, it would hurt far too much. Do you really want to see him around - making it bring back memories? It might be easier for you if you don't be friends. Someone said to me that when my ex said that, what he meant was if we bump into each other we would still say hello. We were friends before we went out with each other but I would be even more torn up inside than I am now if he treated me like one of his friends. If you feel that you don't have any feelings getting in the way then you may be able to be friends. Everyone is different.
    Krs's Avatar
    Krs Posts: 2,906, Reputation: 320
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    #8

    Oct 26, 2006, 03:57 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by shanny_2006
    My boyfriend broke up with me a couple a weeks ago but he wants to be friends with me. Do u think i should forgive him and just be friends?
    Could YOU handle being JUST friends with him?
    That's what you have to consider.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #9

    Oct 26, 2006, 11:56 AM
    Wait a minute here, you didn't even know why you broke up, and now you want to be friends? I missed a whole lot, or I'm too old for this.
    https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relati...-me-39075.html

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