Check out some similar questions!

troyda · Jul 21, 2009, 04:49 AM

Ok, so I met this girl at this place I work about 3 months ago, I texted her about a week after I met her for the first time, and from then on we were best of friends, then 2 weeks later.. she told me she had a boyfriend, and that she didn't know why she didn't want to tell me, by then I was deeply in love with her already... so now she has been blowing me off all the time to hang out with him but when he goes on his church trips she wants to hang out all the time, it was OK as friends, but about the 4th time I told her I bought her a swim suit cause we were going to go swimming at my grandma's house and her sister had hers. She told her boyfriend over the phone that she got a new swimsuit, he asked where and she told him I bought it for her. So now he is mad and told her she can't hang out or talk to me.. and she is listening to him, but she still gives me this adorable smile at work and tells me how much she cares about me.. another reason he won't let her talkt o me is because she called him my name when they were eating.. I need help, is this going anywhere? :( I'm 18 and this is the first girl I've ever paid any attention at all too.. its weird I know.

troyda · Jul 21, 2009, 04:51 AM

She has called him my name about 3 times is what she told me last I heard from her, does it mean she thinks about me as much as I do her?

danielnoahsmommy · Jul 21, 2009, 04:52 AM

She is playing with you. Unfortunately she does not think for herself. Until she can think for herself and figure out what she wants, she is not available.

kctiger · Jul 21, 2009, 05:31 AM

I am not really sure how you fell so "in love" with her and how you became best friends? I can't imagine you hung out with her outside of work that often considering she had a boyfriend to deal with as well. Here is a really good rule of thumb when it comes to girls:

1. Do not and I repeat, DO NOT fall in love with them after a couple months. Especially fall "hard" for them.

2. If they have a boyfriend and you have developed feelings for them, disappear from their life completely. It is only fair to you that you end the confusion and false hope of getting her.

So, opt for #2 and make yourself scarce.

troyda · Jul 21, 2009, 05:35 AM

Originally Posted by kctiger

I am not really sure how you fell so "in love" with her and how you became best friends? I can't imagine you hung out with her outside of work that often considering she had a boyfriend to deal with as well. Here is a really good rule of thumb when it comes to girls:

1. Do not and I repeat, DO NOT fall in love with them after a couple months. Especially fall "hard" for them.

2. If they have a boyfriend and you have developed feelings for them, disappear from their life completely. It is only fair to you that you end the confusion and false hope of getting her.

So, opt for #2 and make yourself scarce.

I think he was out of town or something, I know she spent like every day with me though before she told me that, I think he might have been out of town on a trip because he goes on them a lot, thanks for the answer though, I had my appendics out during this time too and she stayed at the hospitol all night with me, I think that had a big role in it :/

kctiger · Jul 21, 2009, 05:36 AM

Sounds to me like she used you to fill an emotional void while her boyfriend was out of town. NEVER get used by a female (in most cases) as it just really lowers yourself value. Carry on and end contact with her.

troyda · Jul 21, 2009, 05:42 AM

Why does she call him my name? I know she does it because he has texted me about it

kctiger · Jul 21, 2009, 05:47 AM

It doesn't matter... bottome line, she has a boyfriend. She can put a picture of you taped to his face while she has sex with him, and it will not matter! She is not an option for you right now... do you really want to date a female that would do this to her boyfriend?

I wish · Jul 21, 2009, 06:14 AM

You're reading too much into this. I know that when you really fall for someone, you try to analyse every single detail. But since you're here and we have no idea who that person is, we can give you objective advice.

Here's a few more observations:

1) She's has a boyfriend so she's off limits nor matter what else you say.

2) She's used to having a guy to hang around with all the time. So when her boyfriend was on vacation, she felt something missing, so she found you to fill that hole temporarily until her boyfriend comes back.

3) Saying your name or his name doesn't mean anything. My dad always mixes up names between me and my siblings or with his siblings. Some people just aren't good with names. It's a personality issue, not a feelings issues.

I suggest that you leave her alone. The more you talk to her, the more you will over-analyse the signs. But the bottom line is, she has a boyfriend and nor matter what you do, she's still off-limits.

You don't want to be that guy that she cheats with. You don't want to be the guy that fills her emotional void when he's gone. You don't want to be the rebound.

Find someone else who's actually available.