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EmilyQ · Jul 19, 2009, 09:55 AM

So I have been going out with this guy for about 3 or 4 months now.. We moved rather quickly. He moved in with me 3 weeks after being together. Things at first were very rocky. We never really had a sex life, It happened but not very often. We fought all of the time for one thing or another. When I try to inatmate sex ( kissing his upper body, rubbing him,cuddling him or trying to makeout with him) he pushes me away. He always says he's to tired from work. Hes told me a couple of times before that' He feels obligated to have sex with me, like its expected or he knows that I want it and makes him not want it and turns him off." The only time we do have sex is either when he has been drinking or when he is high. I feel like he is not attracted to me, but at times he talks about my body and he gets hard "or so he says". I want to have sex with him all of the time, i am very sexually attracted to him, but we only have sex once every week or every few weeks..
How do I Bring sex into our relationship? I have brought up my concerns to him and all he says is "this is why, the way you talk makes me not want you or it." HOW DO I MAKE HIM WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH ME?

roxypox · Jul 19, 2009, 01:16 PM

Something tells me that this is not really a relationship worth perusing.

He moved in after 3 weeks and you've been together for 3-4 months? Did I read this correctly? Why did he move in so fast? Didn't he have a place of his own?

artlady · Jul 19, 2009, 01:23 PM

I think he is not committed to you or your relationship and his attitude is abusive and I think he is using you for a place to stay.

If this is what you have after three months,your future together looks very bleak.

I would seriously rethink this relationship.I see nothing positive about it and chances are it will only get worse.

I wish · Jul 19, 2009, 05:00 PM

The others were spot on. Just to add what to what they were saying.

Relationships are suppose to be much more natural and much happier. If after 3-4 months you had so many problems, imagine if you continue. It sounds like the longer you stay together, the more problems arise, instead of fixing problems together.

You deserve a much healthier relationship than this. So don't settle for less.

Gemini54 · Jul 19, 2009, 05:14 PM

This sounds really unhealthy to me. You moved in together after 3 weeks, so clearly you hardly know each other. You argue, he's got drug issues, and you rarely have sex.

There are way too many red flags here. Let's face it, it sounds as if you hardly even talk.

You can't MAKE someone want you. You can however make some healthy decisions for yourself.

Get out and have a good think about the way that you approach relationships - if you continue like this you're destined for use and abuse in your connections with men.

Romefalls19 · Jul 19, 2009, 05:23 PM

He sounds like he is living off you, he needed a place to stay, you gave him that. Now he has you and a roof over his head, pretty solid deal to me.

Drop him like the bad habit he really is