[redhed35]

I've read this thread from start to finish.. and I've come to the conclusion that sex ed should be taught,by schools and parents.. but we as adults cannot supervise nor police teenagers every second of every day,they fall to the pressures of their peers,boyfriends/girlfriends and the media.

Our hope as parents and taxpayers is that the majority listen and use protection... sadly I feel I'm taking a very pollyanna outlook here.

There are 12 and 13 year olds having sex,and getting pregnant.
When I was that age I didn't know what a willie looked like,when I was 15/16 I would not let a penis within 10feet of my vagina for fear of pregnancy.

I just think teenagers think it won't happen to them,only the girl up the road.

In saying all this,I do feel if we at least inform our teens about sex,it gives them a better chance to make choices.

[N0help4u]

But it would work if it were taught correctly.

THAT IS the whole entire problem it is not taught correctly
It is taught like something that sounds so glamorous that they HAVE to have it or else they think there is something wrong with them. They are not taught the side where the guy can be tricked into getting her pregnant because she wants a baby so bad. They are not taught that the guy will be paying child support for years to come depending on how many girls he gets pregnant. They are not taught about how the more sex partners they have their oxytocin can diminish and then they are wondering why the guy (or girl) is bonding with the porn or the video game instead of wanting them any more. They are not taught that many teen age girls get tired of the novelity of having a baby and then expect their mom to raise it. There are so many things like responsibility and reality of sex they do not cover. Instead they teach its your body do what you want just make sure you wear a condom and accept homosexuality.

[N0help4u]

You know we keep going around and around about this issue and I bet none of you know what many schools teach in sex ed on a day to day basis. I think it would be a good idea to get the facts by maybe posting a question in the teen section so the teens here can answer what things they are taught about in sex ed.

[Wondergirl]

THAT IS the whole entire problem it is not taught correctly
It is taught like something that sounds so glamorous that they HAVE to have it or else they think there is something wrong with them. They are not taught the side where the guy can be tricked into getting her pregnant because she wants a baby so bad. They are not taught that the guy will be paying child support for years to come depending on how many girls he gets pregnant. They are not taught about how the more sex partners they have their oxytocin can diminish and then they are wondering why the guy (or girl) is bonding with the porn or the video game instead of wanting them any more.

From what I've gathered from the teens I deal with at the library where I work, sex ed is a big joke. Who listens to such crap?? The teens know it all and sit through classes smirking and passing notes to each other. The guys have been carrying around condoms for years, but more as a fun, status-y thing to do. (Heck, who uses a condom? That's sissy stuff!) The teens KNOW (from students who've survived the course) that the teacher is going to hold up colorful pictures of body parts (*giggle*) or tell you to turn to certain pages in the textbook. Once that happens, class attention doesn't exist. Inside jokes and humorous comments abound. Embarrassed students think about England. The sex ed class itself is a joke.

Sex ed should begin in preschool.

[450donn]

SO, why is it that the education system, the one who claims to never have enough money are spending millions of tax payer dollars on a class that does not work? Could it be to support the Teachers unions membership?

[N0help4u]

So what good is the sex ed then?

Where I live it is more like I described. They are taught about sex and they think it is the thing you are suppose to do because you are a teen. Then girl 14 wants baby. Guy wants girl. Girl gets pregnant...
Girl is pregnant with baby #4 by her 21st birthday.
They are taught that being gay or bi is natural so they think it is something they should try just because it is 'natural'.

All they are doing is planting these things in kids heads and the media backs it up. Instead of just presenting facts in a responsible way they make it out to be something teens need to do or else they feel ostrisized. Like I said look at all the kids that come here asking what is wrong with them because they are still a virgin.
That in itself tells me something is wrong with the way sex ed is handled.

[N0help4u]

SO, why is it that the education system, the one who claims to never have enough money are spending millions of tax payer dollars on a class that does not work? could it be to support the Teachers unions membership?

Yeah something like that! It doesn't work end of story!
It needs fixed. I am all for sex ed IF they would restructure it in an effective way.

[Wondergirl]

so what good is the sex ed then?

Where I live it is more like I described. They are taught about sex and they think it is the thing you are suppose to do because you are a teen. Then girl 14 wants baby. Guy wants girl. Girl gets pregnant.......
Girl is pregnant with baby #4 by her 21st birthday.
They are taught that being gay or bi is natural so they think it is something they should try just because it is 'natural'.

All they are doing is planting these things in kids heads and the media backs it up. Instead of just presenting facts in a responsible way they make it out to be something teens need to do or else they feel ostrisized. Like I said look at all the kids that come here asking what is wrong with them because they are still a virgin.
That in itself tells me something is wrong with the way sex ed is handled.

Have you sat in on sex ed classes? Have you talked with the teens yourself, or are you just reporting your impressions and suppositions based on observation? They got the virgin thing from sex ed class or from somewhere else? You KNOW they are taught that being gay or bi is natural?

[N0help4u]

Yeah I talk to teens and young adults all the time. They get it from school and the media.
One guy that is in law and in his 20's told me he laid on his bed with a 12 yr old boy and showed him how to mastrabate and he didn't see a thing wrong with it.
I am not saying it is entirely the sex ed but something isn't right

I also read news articles and listen to parents calling radio stations saying what their kids are being taught. Also read articles like this Gay books at daycare 'inappropriate' - National - smh.com.au

Because these things are not mandated but picked out from a variety of things the school board can choose parents don't think these things are being taught at many schools.

In Massachusetts, students in kindergarten in some schools are being read the gay children's book "King & King''.

Daycares read books to the kids like The Rainbow Cubby House

I wonder why they laugh and giggle like you say. I guess learning to put a condom on a pickle in the 6th grade just does something to them.

[Wondergirl]

something isn't right

That's it in a nutshell. Now, let's make a list of what isn't right--and start with the family.

[kaseyatim]

And it should stay there.



Oh, that's easy. Just stop teaching sex ed in schools. It's not the government's job, it's not the school's job. It is the job of parents. Regardless of whether the parents do the job well or not, schools should stay out of it. It ain't the public school's job to fix the failings of parents.

THAT is how you remedy it so that it doesn't fall to the schools. You simply leave them out of it.

Elliot

You cannot punish the children for something they knew no much better to do if their parents are not teaching them it is not their fault that their parents suck... and I think that it is GREAT that the schools pick up the parents slack... I for one took my sex ed serious I am now 20 yo with an infant but I have a career (Army) a house, and 2 card.. I had a father who said I don't care what you do condom or a casket.. never explain to me the results and at school they did and it spooked, I am now very successful and glad that I listened

[N0help4u]

That's it in a nutshell. Now, let's make a list of what isn't right--and start with the family.

I agree that too many parents either do not want to get into the subject with their kids or they think it is the schools job. Many parents don't even give a care about where their kids are from after school until bedtime. So maybe the question is how to get parents to get involved in teaching their kids. I don't see our great society going in that direction though.
I really don't know that there is an answer because they even say that schools that teach abstinence with sex ed have just as high a rate of pregnancy as any other program.

IDK but all I can say is what we have is broke and needs fixed... somehow.

[Alty]

I was born to two Lutherans, sent to a Catholic school where we were taught sex ed. My parents were great, they did talk about sex with me as well, but figured hearing it from two sources was a good idea.

My godson was born 2 months after we graduated to a very good friend. She was 17 at the time, an Italian Catholic, very strict upbringing, her parents wouldn't let her take sex ed, and they taught her nothing at home. I guess that backfired on them.

I teach sex education to my kids, because I don't want them learning it from their friends. I also teach them to be wary because I was molested as a child, from the age of 5 on by a cousin. My parents never knew. I was also raped at the age of 18, again, my parents never knew. I don't want my children to be prey, so I make sure they know what's out there.

It's a scary world out there, they should be armed with all the knowledge they can get, and they will be taking sex ed in school. In fact, my son starts next year in grade 5, but he already knows the basics.

I'm all for sex ed in schools, because sadly, there are too many parents out there that won't teach their children what they need to know.

Look at the teen boards here, some of the questions we get from 16, 17, 18 year olds plus. Simple basic knowledge, and they don't have a clue.

That's my opinion. :)

[N0help4u]

Look at the teen boards here, some of the questions we get from 16, 17, 18 year olds plus. Simple basic knowledge, and they don't have a clue.

That's my opinion. :)

That is the problem even with the sex education in schools they haven't got a clue they know go out and have sex because it is the thing teens are suppose to do and get pregnant and have babies that's about it. Then if they weren't trying to get pregnant they use abortion as a means of birth control.

[Wondergirl]

have sex because it is the thing teens are suppose to do

No, it's because they have an overabundance of hormones churning through their bodies, few if any restraints, and poor judgment. And opportunities galore!

[cozyk]

THAT IS the whole entire problem it is not taught correctly
It is taught like something that sounds so glamorous that they HAVE to have it or else they think there is something wrong with them. They are not taught the side where the guy can be tricked into getting her pregnant because she wants a baby so bad. They are not taught that the guy will be paying child support for years to come depending on how many girls he gets pregnant. They are not taught about how the more sex partners they have their oxytocin can diminish and then they are wondering why the guy (or girl) is bonding with the porn or the video game instead of wanting them any more. They are not taught that many teen age girls get tired of the novelity of having a baby and then expect their mom to raise it. There are so many things like responsibility and reality of sex they do not cover. Instead they teach its your body do what you want just make sure you wear a condom and accept homosexuality.

How do you know what and how they are teaching? Do you sit in on the classes?

[Wondergirl]

How do you know what and how they are teaching? Do you sit in on the classes?

Did you see her answer to me (same questions) earlier in this thread?

"yeah I talk to teens and young adults all the time. They get it from school and the media.
One guy that is in law and in his 20's told me he laid on his bed with a 12 yr old boy and showed him how to mastrabate and he didn't see a thing wrong with it.
I am not saying it is entirely the sex ed but something isn't right

I also read news articles and listen to parents calling radio stations saying what their kids are being taught. Also read articles like this Gay books at daycare 'inappropriate' - National - smh.com.au

Because these things are not mandated but picked out from a variety of things the school board can choose parents don't think these things are being taught at many schools.

In Massachusetts, students in kindergarten in some schools are being read the gay children's book "King & King''.

Daycares read books to the kids like The Rainbow Cubby House

I wonder why they laugh and giggle like you say. I guess learning to put a condom on a pickle in the 6th grade just does something to them."

[N0help4u]

No, it's because they have an overabundance of hormones churning through their bodies, few if any restraints, and poor judgment. And opportunities galore!

Yeah opportunities galore and hormones is right so what good is the sex education when even you say they ignore it and giggle about it.
But even teens on these boards have said that it is the teen thing to do. So how are you saying no when they make that claim themselves?

[Wondergirl]

yeah opportunities galore and hormones is right so what good is the sex education when even you say they ignore it and giggle about it.
But even teens on these boards have said that it is the teen thing to do. so how are you saying no when they make that claim their self?

That's where parents come into the picture. We need to get parents trained to start sex ed when the kids are little.

[kaseyatim]

yeah opportunities galore and hormones is right so what good is the sex education when even you say they ignore it and giggle about it.
But even teens on these boards have said that it is the teen thing to do. so how are you saying no when they make that claim their self?

Sex is a choice that ANY person has and THAT is what needs to be taught; while it may seem like the "teen thing" to do it's going to take teens talking to teens and peers agreeing thatits good to wait and it takes ADULT INFLUENCE (no matter where it comes from school or home) and depending on who those teens feel is telling them the truthb/c some teens don't listen to there parents but feel like the teachers are more realistic or the counselors at school or whoever I am twenty years old and to this day there is a girl I went to high school with is STILL a virgin and she is 3 years my elder there was someone who's words touched her and meant something to her her and NO its not going to work for all the teens but damn if we as adults young adults peer teens and parents could touch at least one or two people in the adolescent community I know I would be very proud of myself and if all adults felt that way I think america would have a brighter future on the subject matter or tee pregnancy... I also as a young child was raped by a family friend and for a very long time was scared that if I said no to a man that he was going to take it either way so I may as well just give it to him and if some one older than me would have ever told me that there was other options then I think life would have been simpler for me growing up as a teenager.. so I am and will always be a firm believer that children and teens need INFLUENCE from adults to do the right things. And every adult is not compatible with every child but if we as parents don't try and then then have reinforcement at the schools and even rec centers and out of school classes and places children can go without fear of being judged s/a school counselors then... who can they go to their friends and as I read in the bible (dont remember which verse) It's like the blind leading the blind, and they fall into a ditch.