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    elizabeth11's Avatar
    elizabeth11 Posts: 14, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Jul 7, 2009, 09:29 PM
    Has my ex boyfriends really miss me or is he just lonely?
    OK so here is my situation. I fell in love with this guy and we dated for 6 months and they were the best times of my life. (he broke up with me once for a few days.. no biggie) then a few days after our 6 months he said he needed "space" so we broke up and a few days later he was dating one of his best friends.. who I had trusted him with. And he spent a year with her and he never talked to me. Well me and his new girlfriend fought all the time through Facebook and it got ot of control because she was accusing me of things I didn't do and my ex would stick up for her. I never got over hi no matter how rude they both of them were to me.

    A few months ago he "accidently" texted me and he just so happened to be in the neighborhood when I was out playing soccer and so we hung out. It was nice... then he broke up with his girlfriend. And started talking to me. And we have hung out a few times

    But here my problem... none of my friends like him but they say they will support me. His parents don't like me because of how I treated his girlfriend and so he hasn't told him and I'm absolutely 100% sure I'm in love with him. Does he really want me? Or is he just loenly? What do I do? Help
    elizabeth11's Avatar
    elizabeth11 Posts: 14, Reputation: 1
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    #2

    Jul 7, 2009, 09:34 PM
    Do I forget?
    Do you ever forget your first love?
    ChihuahuaMomma's Avatar
    ChihuahuaMomma Posts: 7,378, Reputation: 608
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    #3

    Jul 7, 2009, 09:36 PM

    Nope. Every experience is a learning and growing experience. Most of people's first loves are just that.
    elizabeth11's Avatar
    elizabeth11 Posts: 14, Reputation: 1
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    #4

    Jul 7, 2009, 09:38 PM

    Do I ever get over him... or will it be the same feeling every time I see him.
    ChihuahuaMomma's Avatar
    ChihuahuaMomma Posts: 7,378, Reputation: 608
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    #5

    Jul 7, 2009, 09:39 PM

    He's made a stupid decision to end a relationship to sow wilds oats with an ex. You made a stupid decision to jump back into his games.

    I suggest not talking to him, and telling him your heart can't bear to do this again. And leave it at that.
    Torrid13's Avatar
    Torrid13 Posts: 637, Reputation: 149
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    #6

    Jul 7, 2009, 09:39 PM

    Step 1.) Run away.
    Step 2.) Don't look back. Ever.
    Step 3.) Find someone else who is worth your time. Do you really want someone who is so fickle?


    Nah, didn't think so.
    elizabeth11's Avatar
    elizabeth11 Posts: 14, Reputation: 1
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    #7

    Jul 7, 2009, 09:40 PM

    But its so hard! He said he wants to date me for a while and see what happens.
    Torrid13's Avatar
    Torrid13 Posts: 637, Reputation: 149
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    #8

    Jul 7, 2009, 09:42 PM

    If you keep exposing yourself to him and the pain, you'll NEVER get over him.

    My suggestion? Block the girl and his sorry butt on FB, and oh, never hang out or talk to him again.

    Like I said, if you never give yourself time to heal, you'll be MISERABLE. And no one wants that.

    Sure, you'll probably always remember him, but at least when you remember him it won't feel like someone's breaking your arms off.
    Torrid13's Avatar
    Torrid13 Posts: 637, Reputation: 149
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    #9

    Jul 7, 2009, 09:44 PM

    Girl, he's just going to poke you in the head. You're going to get hurt. Don't fall for his crap again.

    It hurts, and you're right, it IS hard. But your heart and sanity is worth it. Let him go, Sweetheart.

    If he's fickle today, he'll be fickle tomorrow, next month, and next year. Don't set yourself up for inevitable pain.
    ChihuahuaMomma's Avatar
    ChihuahuaMomma Posts: 7,378, Reputation: 608
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    #10

    Jul 7, 2009, 09:44 PM

    I agree (for the most part) that you'll never get over him unless you cut him from your life. In my experience they need to be a memory, and not a fixture in your life to fully heal.
    Torrid13's Avatar
    Torrid13 Posts: 637, Reputation: 149
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    #11

    Jul 7, 2009, 09:46 PM

    Maybe eventually have a conversation with him, but for right now, I definitely think it's best to just sever the ties.

    Worked for me.

    But of course, everyone is different.
    elizabeth11's Avatar
    elizabeth11 Posts: 14, Reputation: 1
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    #12

    Jul 7, 2009, 09:48 PM

    Thanks. I'm going to try to starting tomorrow
    elizabeth11's Avatar
    elizabeth11 Posts: 14, Reputation: 1
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    #13

    Jul 7, 2009, 09:51 PM

    Thanks you so much
    ChihuahuaMomma's Avatar
    ChihuahuaMomma Posts: 7,378, Reputation: 608
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    #14

    Jul 7, 2009, 09:51 PM

    Leave him alone and HEAL.

    OR

    Goof around with him until he finds someone new, and get HURT.

    The choice is yours, it seems obvious to me.
    ChihuahuaMomma's Avatar
    ChihuahuaMomma Posts: 7,378, Reputation: 608
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    #15

    Jul 7, 2009, 09:53 PM

    Please don't post two posts about the same subject, it confuses people.
    ChihuahuaMomma's Avatar
    ChihuahuaMomma Posts: 7,378, Reputation: 608
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    #16

    Jul 7, 2009, 09:54 PM

    You won't ever get over him if you are dating him.
    friend4u178's Avatar
    friend4u178 Posts: 3,349, Reputation: 1584
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    #17

    Jul 7, 2009, 09:54 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by elizabeth11 View Post
    do you ever forget your first love?
    Probably not forget as there will always be the memories , good and bad.

    Quote Originally Posted by elizabeth11 View Post
    do i ever get over him...or will it be the same feeling everytime i see him.
    Here's the good news , YES you do get over him with time. How much time depends on you and as long as you let go of the thought of getting back with him the quicker it will be.

    Good Luck :)
    elizabeth11's Avatar
    elizabeth11 Posts: 14, Reputation: 1
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    #18

    Jul 7, 2009, 09:55 PM

    Yea. I live in denial. I'm scared that if I don't take the chanc I'm going to miss out on something. And its been a year since we talked and I'm still not over him and every time I go on a date with a new guy it just doesn't seem right and it doesn't feel right. It just plain out sucks
    friend4u178's Avatar
    friend4u178 Posts: 3,349, Reputation: 1584
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    #19

    Jul 7, 2009, 10:11 PM

    So he broke up with you to date someone else only a few days later the last time. What makes you think he won't do it again.
    Don't put up with someone you can't ever trust.

    Believe someone else will come along that's not going to be a good BF to you , just takes time. A usually happens when you least expect it.
    nikosmom's Avatar
    nikosmom Posts: 1,611, Reputation: 488
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    #20

    Jul 7, 2009, 10:19 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by elizabeth11 View Post
    does he really want me? or is he just loenly? wat do i do? help
    He's lonely. If he really wanted you, he wouldn't keep needing "space". He'd treat you like you matter to him. He wouldn't continue to dangle his affections in front of you like a carrot. You'd know how he feels. When a man is into you- he will let you know. He will make sure of it.

    Do not let him continue to play on your emotions because he will do it as long as you allow it.
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