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    Chocice's Avatar
    Chocice Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Jun 20, 2009, 03:38 PM
    Jelous woman
    Confused:
    Hi, well I have ben with my fiancé for 4 years. He has raised my son since a baby when the bio ran away. Hes a fantastic dad and provider. And in general he is a great man.
    But to be very blunt, he has wore me in to the ground. He is cold and uncarring towards me.he swears that he loves me and declairs his love for me to everyone. But this is not what I see.I Hes sharp, nasty, moody towards me. He never shows me any attention, and when I try to discuss it he tells to 'just stop it'. He says very hurtful things about me and then says sorry after. He just never seems intersrested. I used to be very confident and stable. But over the past few years I have become parnoid, anxiuos and jelous. Im jelous of every woman I see, and I'm a model!
    I don't think I have to be jelous of any woman, but I am. I get so stressed at the thought of him looking at other women. Its not really the looking, its what he's thinking in his head when he looks at another woman. What started this is when he told me all the women who he likes from TV. And I'm mixed race and all the women he likes are white. This makes me crazy at least once a day! I cause so many arguments by setting fiction scenes and asking him what he would do. I watch his eyes everywhere we go. I just feel like I'm going insane!! I think I'm making him feel like this towards me, because of my stressing, but I can't feel better unless I get the better love and attention from him. And we just go round and round. The question is.. whats going on here, what do I do? What's wrong with me?
    jenniepepsi's Avatar
    jenniepepsi Posts: 4,042, Reputation: 533
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    #2

    Jun 20, 2009, 03:40 PM

    Sounds like you could stand some marriage counseling, and individual counceling for both of you as well.

    These are common marriage problems, and CAN be over come, but they will eat away at your marriage until there is nothing left, and it all falls apart.

    Good luck hon.

    *hugs*


    *edit* I understand your not married yet, but the concept still applies :)
    Chocice's Avatar
    Chocice Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #3

    Jun 20, 2009, 03:42 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by jenniepepsi View Post
    sounds like you could stand some marriage councelling, and individual counceling for both of you as well.

    these are common marriage problems, and CAN be over come, but they will eat away at your marriage untill there is nothing left, and it all falls apart.

    good luck hon.

    *hugs*


    *edit* i understand your not married yet, but the concept still applies :)
    Thank you xxx
    Gemini54's Avatar
    Gemini54 Posts: 2,871, Reputation: 1116
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    #4

    Jun 23, 2009, 11:37 PM
    I think that you could really benefit from going to counselling on your own.

    Firstly, it will assist you to deal with a difficult relationship and to learn to be assertive in the face of what is potentially abusive behavior. Secondly, it will assist you to deal with your own obsessive thinking/behavior and your increasing lack of self confidence.

    Relationships should add value to your life and make you feel happy. But first, you must be happy with yourself. Once you're feeling more confident you may not want to stay in what seems, a dysfunctional partnership. But, only you can decide that!

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