[jvilla0713]

One of my closest friends, of about 3 years, has recently graduated college. For the last year or so she and I have been really close. We talked almost every day. For hours on end, about anything and everything. Sometimes to the point of sillyness... We've had our ups and downs but that's only natural, right? Since she lives in another state, where she went to school, we really only communicate via phone, email or I'm.

For the last couple of months, leading up to her graduation, and since then. We rarely talk. I figured she's been very busy with school, preparing for graduation and finding a job which she wasn't too thrilled about, so I hadn't really read too much into it plus I know she tends to get depressed easily. But over these few months, when we do talk. She's very short with me and sometimes snippy. And it hurts my feelings but I feel like if I say something she'll just get upset so I let her be. Our last few conversations have been less than pleasant and so I've been keeping my distance to avoid getting my feelings hurt further. I haven't done anything to her (that I can think of) for her to just decide she doesn't want to talk to me anymore but its hard to read people when it's a long distance friendship. I was supposed to visit her earlier this month but I had to cancel plans due to work conflicts. When I told her I couldn't make it, it seemed like she didn't even care. I mentioned doing something later in the year and her response was less than enthused. We've never had any major fights or conflicts just some minor bumps and butting of heads. I just don't know what to make of it. I've given her space, which has been good for me because I focus my time and energy on my own life and problems. At the same time, as a friend, if she's going through stuff I want her to know I'm here for her... its just hard to be a friend to someone who is, quite frankly, pushing you away. Do I just let her be and see if she comes around? Or should I talk to her?

[talaniman]

It's a fact of life that people change and go in there own directions, and live there own life. Happens to us all. Trying to hold on to what you had yesterday seldom works, so enjoy the memories and hope your friend does to. You may never know what they are going through at the time, so don't take it personally when they are preoccupied or distracted by their own personal business. Understand and keep it moving for yourself.

[I wish]

Sounds like a few of my friends from college. I've accepted that they have changed and they're probably never going to be the person they were before.

Accept that they are a different person, treat them accordingly and don't live in the past anymore. Time to move forward in life.

[davett]

You have to let her go. I split up with my ex after her mom died from a long illness. I think it made her assess what she wants at the moment and unfortunately that didn't include me in the plans. I tried to get close to her but she kepts her distance and eventually we split up. People sometimes grow apart and move in different directions.

If you have recently left college then there will be plenty more fish in the sea. Go out and enjoy life and experiencing the opposite sex. You don't have to settle down until your 30s. You have time on your hands