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    Haylow_16's Avatar
    Haylow_16 Posts: 16, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Jun 5, 2009, 08:05 PM
    Dad to be behavior while your pregnant.
    Im 6 months pregnant and my boyfriend acts so strange compared to his usual behavior. Hes controlling now more than ever, he doesn't want any part of my body showing which can be good but he never wanted to pick out my clothes before, He wants me to to do everything by the book the walks and everything but he and I both know that the doctor told me I'm doing good, I eat from every food group and everything. I feel like he's worried I'm doing something wrong. He wants to be out more than ever visiting his family and friends but mostly enrolling himself in school and finding a job which is so good but sometimes I want to be selfish because I want attention. Is that wrong? Why do you think he wants to be gone so much? And what's this behavior mean? Its kind of driving me craxy...
    mudweiser's Avatar
    mudweiser Posts: 2,750, Reputation: 707
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    #2

    Jun 5, 2009, 08:10 PM

    How old are you?
    Do you live together?

    In my opinion this is normal behavior. Although he is being quite controlling, he seems to be worried about the future.

    Try sitting him down and talking to him.

    Sarah
    bizygurl's Avatar
    bizygurl Posts: 522, Reputation: 110
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    #3

    Jun 5, 2009, 08:40 PM

    He defenitly sounds a little bit controlling. It may be in a way because everything is new and he's just trying to do the right thing the best way he knows how. Just as woman for the first time, men go through similar feelings and anxieties about what's to come with being a new parent. I think you should give him some credit for being responsible in finding a job. But if it bothers you a lot and you really feel neglected defenitly bring it to his attention. Start communicating, you have a little miracle on the way.. that in itself is going to have to make you two start communicating. Good luck!
    jmjoseph's Avatar
    jmjoseph Posts: 2,727, Reputation: 1244
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    #4

    Jun 5, 2009, 09:02 PM
    Things change for BOTH sexes when there's a baby on the way. He's just "nesting" like you ladies do. He sounds responsible, but controlling. Lay out clothes for him to wear and see how much he likes it . I don't know about being away from you, he may be stressing out too much. He DOES need to understand you need to be pampered some , and make you feel pretty and sexy. Is he afraid to have sex with you too? I married a flight attendant who flies to EUROPE on the weekends. Imagine the stressing out I was doing when children were coming into the picture. It's not like I could call her when something went wrong, like the best way to clean poop out the bubble bath, or how to extract cheerios from nostrils. Anyway tell him things are going to be fine. My wife's in Moscow right now , and I just got my 4 and 7 year old boys to sleep without incident. Good luck and GOD bless you and your family.
    Haylow_16's Avatar
    Haylow_16 Posts: 16, Reputation: 1
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    #5

    Jun 6, 2009, 12:53 PM

    Im 18 he and I both, We have been together a year and a half. We have talked about getting married even before I was pregnant, but more now that I am pregnant.. his family and my own are very excited and bring that idea up a lot which I think overwhelms the both of us a bit because we have a lot to prepare for already, but we have talked about that. He is more controllong now and shows that he's jealous which I never seen that side before. He's more affectionate which is good and tells me how much he loves me and how he thinks Im beautiful. But it kind of upsets me that he seems so worried I don't want him to have doubts because it makes me worry too.
    mudweiser's Avatar
    mudweiser Posts: 2,750, Reputation: 707
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    #6

    Jun 6, 2009, 01:24 PM

    A shotgun wedding is never a good idea. Especially when your partner's claws start to come out.

    You do need to talk to him. Tell him how you feel and what his actions may seem caring but come out the wrong way. It would be great if you went to go see a councilor, I know pregnancy centers have people available to help you talk to your partner. Maybe even a pastor [if your religious].

    First deal with the behavior, and put your foot down. Seriously- sometimes an inch becomes a mile.

    Marriage shouldn't be your focus right now. It's really hard to get out of. Imagine if your boyfriend turns or well actually shows his true colors after a few months or even mere weeks of marriage. You won't like it.

    AskMeHelpDesk is here for support.

    Sarah
    babwgreen123's Avatar
    babwgreen123 Posts: 15, Reputation: 1
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    #7

    Jun 8, 2009, 06:17 PM

    Hi there I think I have the right answer to why your boyfriend is behaving differnetly if this is your bfs frist child then he could be going threw shock that relity hasn't kicked in yet both female and male go threw emoctional change its his body telling him aw no you have to change its him been a dad really he's trying to make sure his babes OK that your eating healthy keeping it healthy an us woman no what were doing but men react to feelings differently I wouldn't worry too much with your boyfriend been the way he is it just shows he's going to be a great dad as he's trying to better himself to provide he's making sure both of you are OK I'm a parnet to one and I exactly no what me an my ex went threw been our frist child if you have anymore questions to ask me email me [email protected]
    scott_1976's Avatar
    scott_1976 Posts: 96, Reputation: 19
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    #8

    Jun 8, 2009, 06:23 PM

    Sounds to me that he is scared. Guys natural instinct is to fix and protect. He sounds freaked out to me. I would sit down with him and get him talking, I bet he is just scared. Is this his first child?
    Haylow_16's Avatar
    Haylow_16 Posts: 16, Reputation: 1
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    #9

    Jun 10, 2009, 04:29 PM

    This is our first child no children for either of us before this.. I never said that I was rushing into marriage, I said we've talked about it.. I think its normal to talk about and/or plan the future we both know that marriage right this instant would be too much for us. I mean it's our first child, of course you think of what the future holds right. But Yes its our fisrt baby and he seems so excited and I guess you could say scared all at once but I don't blame him, I know I'm moody I can feel it myself and I get irritated easily and evrything, He says he's just ready for his little boy to be here so I can go back to normal, lol. Everyone tells him don't worry it's only the hormones you're half way there... Im not sure what's making him act so crazy..

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