[k_irene]

I have been living with my boyfriend for the last year. We got along very well, had a very compatible lifestyle with lots of mutual affection. I was very happy. He has been under a lot of stress lately with being laid off from his high-tech job and unable to find anything, and I was doing my best to be supportive. One day he said he wanted to move to another city to work during the week and commute back on weekends. I objected, and all of a sudden everything blew up. First he said he couldn't count on me, then when I objected to that, he said that HE wasn't committed to ME, and that there were some things about me and our relationship that bothered him. I was utterly devastated, as all of this came totally out of the blue; I had believed our relationship to be secure and stable and safe. So I ended up moving out that very day, and have been shifting from one girlfriend's to another for the last month while he "thinks". We have had a few conversations by phone and in person while he works out what he wants. It has all been very shattering for me, as I feel I have been left hanging in limbo, and without a home. He gives conflicting, confusing messages. Last night was our most open, calm conversation yet. We talked about what we each wanted in a relationship; and then he said he wasn't able to have a relationship right now. So I thought, it's over. Then he says he wants to talk next weekend when he isn't so tired, he wants to hear more of what I have to say, and he wants us to have a "date", go out to our usual pub or something. Should I go? I loved our life together, and I loved the guy (can I still?), but I feel very abused by all this. Each day is a torment to get through when I'm just waiting for a chance to talk to him. Part of me wants to tell him where to go, part of me knows he's confused and hopes he'll realize he cherishes me as a loving loyal partner, a gift. How can I understand him better? Can I persuade him he should take me back? Please advise!

[BattleAngel14745]

Oh my God, it's guys like this that fu*king piss me off so much! They need to fu*king grow up and act like an adult. My advise is to move on and focus on yourself. Be "friends" with him not "friends with benifits" only friends. He's very insecure and unstable. He's obviously not ready for a "grown up" relationship. He losses his job and takes it out on you. What a sad little boy. God, I'm so pissed right now. Who the fu*k does he think he is hurting you because he can't handle his own sh*t! He's totally "playing" you don't let him! You obviously can't count on him for sh*t and he's an irresponsible selfish child. Work on you and focus on you. I can't stress that enough. Find a real man or some one that you can count on. That won't fall a part and take it every thing out on you because he can't handle his own sh*t. What the heck obviously he's a fu*king insecure unstable irresponsible selfish bastard! You are so much better then that and you know it. Sh*t I don't even know you and I know it. He's a loser. Don't let his drag you down too.